First real encouter with a girl

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by muchepicfail, Jan 19, 2009.

  1. muchepicfail

    muchepicfail Member

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    The story: This past friday, me and some friends of mine went to another friend's house for a kick-back. Everyone was just chillin and a lil bit later into the night, "the girl" was helping our friend, the kick-back host, into bed cuz he was pretty shit-faced. So I go over and help her out. We started talking a lil bit in the hallway. When ppl started crowding in the hallway, we went to take a seat on the couch. So it's me, the girl, and 2 of my guy friends on the couch now. We're all just laughing and making small talk with the host's friends and she moved her hand onto my leg. At this point, I could tell she was really drunk so I didn't really make anything of it. But when she started grabbing for my hand, I took it as a sign that maybe she liked me so i grabbed back. Throughout the rest of the night, we were pretty much always together; she was leaning on me. Sadly, it never went anywhere else. It was mostly me being hesitant/too nice because I'm pretty sure she would've been down. Even then, I probably wouldn't have done much. I do regret not at least making out with her a little.

    Ok some background info: I'm sophmore in college (UCSB) and she's same year but goes to UCI. I've got her number and we've been IM'ing for the past two days. I'm really unsure of my next plan of action. I don't mind just being friends with her but something inside me wants to see if this might go anywhere (unlikely due to the long distance). So yea, I'd like some opinions/advice on how i handled this, my first encounter and on what I should do next.
     
  2. ware_ru

    ware_ru I know, I know, I'm amazing

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    try to have sex with her.
     
  3. knucks

    knucks Active Member

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    I would've tried to make out.
    Encounters like that, especially when one or both are drunk, are..tough..and you say that you go to two different schools.

    Don't make a big deal of it, but maybe if you ever visit her campus or she yours, you guys could meet up somewhere :dunno:
     
  4. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    the distance means a real relationship is probably not gonna happen/not a good idea.

    just try to arrange to be at the same party or bar as her, and this time move things forward physically.
     
  5. Zot

    Zot OT Supporter

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    Name? :naughty: haha jk

    You have nothing to lose, so just make plans to meet up sometime. Worst case, it doesn't work out and you're in the same spot you're in right now. :bigthumb:
     
  6. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    you should have suggested she return with you to your room for some mutual exploration
     
  7. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    quit IM'ing her

    make a date plan

    invite her on the date

    go on the date

    or if you don't want to date just have her come over to watch a movie and try to nail her

    either way all this chit chat will get you nothing other than a female friend
     
  8. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    the im'ing is going to get our broseph here in the friendzone pretty fast as I am assuming there are no sexual undertones in the conversation :rofl:
     
  9. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    :werd:

    A.B.E.

    Always Be Escalating.

    He got to this point which is good, but now for some reason he is content to stay there.

    He hopes if he keeps talking to her long enough that at some point she will make the physical stuff happen but the reality is that its the man's job to escalate the relationship physically (this isn't an insult - I know this from first-hand experience).
     
  10. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    Also be aware that she is looking for her Prince Charming.

    Prince Charming is busy out in the world doing important stuff everyday and certainly isn't available by instant messenger.

    He's a man's man. Men want to be like him and women want to be with him.

    Constant availability sends her a message that is not consistent with how her Prince Charming would behave.
     
  11. Ideotique

    Ideotique Drinking on monday nights does not make me an alco

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    As someone who has been there and fucked up

    Get the hell off that computer, call her, arrange a date. And call it a Date. Don't say "lets hang out" and then go for gold son. Then don't call her again until you need to set up the date.

    Phone calls are only good in a LDR, and then only if you are having phone sex with her.
     
  12. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    excellent advice above

    personally I would solidify all the details on the invitation phone call so you don't have to call back again. but if its going to be like 5 days between the invitation and the date you should call back a couple of days before so she knows it still on

    also never accept a confirmation call (she'll agree then say something like "ok i'll go but call me before so i can confirm). the confirmation call means she is just agreeing now but then when you call to confirm she either won't answer or she will tell you something came up

    and don't accept anything other than an enthusiastic "yes" from her when you make the invitation. If she is unsure or makes excuses just say "Ok, maybe another time" and get off the phone.

    When she accepts and you work out the details of when and where to meet, say goodbye and get off the phone, don't hang around on the phone chatting

    oh and call early in the week for a weekend date. if you call her on Thursday or Friday you are basically putting her in a position where she has to admit she's a loser by revealing that she has no plans, so even if she doesn't have plans she will tell you she does. But if you call Tuesday or early Wednesday you are good to go.
     
  13. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    very important
     
  14. GammaRadiation

    GammaRadiation Active Member

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    Fuck IMing. Keep non-in person contact short and sweet. Preferably by calling or the occasional text. Make sure to call, though.

    Set up a date plan or invite her to another get together where you'll be able to devote attention to oneanother.
     
  15. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    She's most likely being nice. Odds are she was attracted to you at the party and was looking for a random party make out or hook up session.

    You should have fooled around when you had the chance and seen where it went from there. Stop being hesitant, and stop being nice. You wont get any hookups when you're like that.

    You don't have much time left in college. Hookup with girls now as it is harder to hookup with them after college. And for fuck's sake, make sure you wear a rubber.
     
  16. GammaRadiation

    GammaRadiation Active Member

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    A thick one so you dont bust 5 sec after penetration. :rofl:
     
  17. muchepicfail

    muchepicfail Member

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    Alright guess I've got a general idea of my next course of action. On a side note, wanted to mention that the girl had a fucken 6'7'' friend with her who gave me the dirtiest looks. That kinda played a big part in me not jumping at chances to make out... :ugh:
     
  18. GammaRadiation

    GammaRadiation Active Member

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    All girls have the fat/tall/manly/ogre friend they take with them to make sure they dont go home with the wrong guy. Fact of the matter is, she is just a bitch with pent up man hate because she cant get laid by her idealistic sort of guys.
     
  19. D7

    D7 OT Supporter

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    This

    And always have more than 1 rubber. You never know about breaks, what type she prefers, how many you need :naughty:
     
  20. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    so you both have a mutual friend, who's important enough to hang out with on a fri night.... but a relationship is too much trouble due to distance?


    quit making excuses.
     
  21. muchepicfail

    muchepicfail Member

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    Well I'm willing to make it work if she is but iono hard to say if'd ibe secure enough to handle it..
     
  22. Bob Brown

    Bob Brown bewshit, bewshit, bewshit

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    JUST DO IT !!!!

    quit thinking about the future when there isn't even a present yet.
     
  23. muchepicfail

    muchepicfail Member

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    Lol yea I guess im jumping the gun thinking so far off... So far, it's been her who've initiated conversions with me. She said she might be coming back up for a visit in a few weeks. I'm not sure if I should wait that long or just go down myself. Fucken shit ton of school work not helping make this go any smoother either...
     
  24. knucks

    knucks Active Member

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    just let it ride and do go out of your way.
    you can find out when she's coming and maybe hit her up on that date and see what's up :dunno:
     
  25. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Its obvious you have no idea what YOU want :).

    Just go for the gold. Call her and tell her you're coming down for dinner and drinks, and she has no choice
     

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