female basic training experience

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by radfad88, Aug 6, 2009.

  1. radfad88

    radfad88 The Batman-O-Lantern

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    So... I thought I'd write a quick post about the vaginarium effects of army basic training on a girl ("female soldier"). At least in my experience.

    10 weeks of being treated like a completely unisexual soldier took a real toll on me. I came to basic training with a boyfriend and a lot of confidence and I left with a pretty muddled sexual identity (no not in a homo/bisexual/bicurious way).

    I don't know if it was stress or all the PT or marching miles and miles with a ruck sack but for some reason I haven't had a period since the day I was issued my uniform (beginning of May). My hormones have pretty much shut down and I'm still waiting for them to kick back up! I went from being a pretty sexually active person to having absolutely no desire for any kind of touching (myself or others). I can honestly say that sex didn't cross my mind during the entire BCT.

    During training my boyfriend continued to write me and send me packages. I talked to him twice since I was only allowed on the phone 4 times and twice I called my parents. He seemed upbeat about being so far apart and game for coming to graduation. When he got there to see me I tried to fake enthusiasm but the stress of basic had really taken its toll on me and I just wasn't feeling lovey at all. I didn't want to hold hands let alone kiss or fuck. I can understand his frustration with this (10 weeks is a long time for someone to wait and then not get any I guess), but I really could make no excuses for myself.... I was in such a funk. For the next 4 days he didn't talk to me (didn't answer his phone) until I got a facebook message saying I should have my parents come pick up what I left over at his house. So I went 10 weeks without getting a dear jane letter only to get one 3 days into AIT school. Great.

    I'm really not even that upset about it, really. It's kind of a relief because now I am truly the only person I need to worry about right now. I am upset about my general attitude right now though. Basic Training is supposed to instill 'confidence' and assuredness.... I feel 10x's less confident now than I did before. I was always last at basic training in almost everthing I did. They never had my size in any of the equipment and I was always smallest and slowest (45 lb rucks are heavier on a person 5'3" and 100 lbs than on a 6'2" male). I'm trying to relearn how to feel capable and beautiful but all I see when I look in the mirror is a rough looking soldier with not enough sleep and baggy camo clothes.


    I've tried talking to some of the other girls here and they all said that they had no problems getting back into feeling girly and sexy... I'm wondering if this is something that just happens to some people and how I should try getting over it... will it just take time? Anyone have any suggestions?
     
  2. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    The period thing is very common for females if they're pushing their bodies hard. It happens a lot with female figure competitors when getting ready for a show.

    Suggestion: Start lifting weights. It will make dealing with the loads you have to carry a lot easier.


    Other than that, good luck with working through it all.
     
  3. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    Awh! Im sorry to hear about how the break up happened.. but its prob for the best.. like you said you only have to worry about yourself now :hsd:

    About the feeling girly part.. you will prob feel girly soon when you can have your make up and your hair stuff and you can wear girly stuff..
     
  4. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Sorry that you got hurt and are feeling confused and all that, but I'm glad you finally got rid of the boyfriend. That was a long time coming anyway.
     
  5. radfad88

    radfad88 The Batman-O-Lantern

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    Not sure if you were up to date but I dumped the shitty boyfriend back a few months ago... this was a (fairly) new one...
     
  6. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    so then it was nothing serious anyway?
     
  7. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    This was the older dude who was also in the Army right?
     
  8. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Oh, no, I missed that.

    In that case, :hug:
     
  9. radfad88

    radfad88 The Batman-O-Lantern

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    yeah but it still sucks to be dumped via facebook right after basic.

    yes.
     
  10. CorpseStreet

    CorpseStreet New Member

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    How long has it been since you've been done with basic training? Once things start to calm down in your life and your body isn't pushed as much your period should return. I think that having your period come back would probably help you in finding your femininity. Can you take a day to yourself and pamper yourself? Maybe try on your favorite outfit that makes you feel good about yourself and just have fun. You were stressed for several weeks and like you said as a result of basic training your idea of your sexual identity was messed up. Just give yourself time to find your femininity again and become happy with yourself.
     
  11. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    Be extra careful with your feelings right now.. Guys at AIT are going to tell you ANYTHING to get in your pants.

    You will heal over time. Although when I got out of basic all i wanted to do was fuck (guy's perspective). All the girls that were with us were the same way and they were having sex like they had never stopped.

    Focus on school now. I'm sorry for being a dick about your feelings with this but your job is everything. If you fail out, your fucked.

    Good luck.
     
  12. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    lol wut? :mamoru:
     
  13. radfad88

    radfad88 The Batman-O-Lantern

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    unfortunately the army makes you go straight from BCT to AIT school for your job training so I still can't wear any civilian clothes until I "phase up" (about 3 weeks from now). I do have a little more freedom (makeup, computer, cell phones, etc.) and my body isn't nearly as stressed here so hopefully my period will come back and things will get back to normal.

    I am starting to notice a lot more attention from the males here but I'm still not feeling very comfortable flirting. Plus it's not like we're supposed to act on anything, we're technically at work :p
     
  14. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    I assume you were fit before you joined?
     
  15. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    I don't understand your confusion. My post was pretty straight forward.
     
  16. radfad88

    radfad88 The Batman-O-Lantern

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    lol i'm not going to fail. i've been doing this shit since i was 12, i could probably do it sleeping. that is the last of my worries. and as far as guys getting in my pants it's obviously nott going to happen if i couldn't even muster the want for my boyfriend.
     
  17. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    I was pointing out that "you're fucked" is what you should have typed. It's funny because you said to focus on school but then typed "your" instead of "you're."
     
  18. radfad88

    radfad88 The Batman-O-Lantern

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    I was thin but not really "fit" I ran like a 10 minute mile when I came in. Now I run like an 18 min 2 mile (not great but up to standard for a female my age).
     
  19. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    better then I can do :cool:
     
  20. radfad88

    radfad88 The Batman-O-Lantern

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    this is my pet peeve of life. "your" vs. "you're", learn it!


    Gotta go until tomorrow, no wifi in the barracks here and they're kicking me out of the defac :(
     
  21. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    Honestly for your size you should be a lot faster. 9 min mile? Getting it down to 7 min should not be hard at all with some effort.




    edit: I ran cross country in high school and running is 90% mental. 99.9% of people never push their bodies to the limit.
     
  22. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    I don't know what your school/job is or is like, but mine was fucking hard. I was 18 and had a hard time focusing, but made it through just fine.

    You will be amazed at the changes that you are going to go through in the next few months. Girls that would normally not get any attention all of a sudden have guys falling all over them. I have experienced this first hand and still do.

    Military guys are (for the most part) extremely horny and will try to get the easiest catch that they can..AKA girls that are in the barracks. I lived in the barracks for 3 years..I know because I have seen this shit over and over...and over.

    You'll see.
     
  23. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    :rofl:

    I see now :o
     
  24. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    Her most recent Ex was in the Army too....
     
  25. BadKat

    BadKat GIVE ME WINE!!

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    As someone who went through Navy basic (not as physically demanding as Army basic, I admit) I can tell you something that from your posts, you didn't seem to understand.

    Basic Training is NOT for making you feel Confident and in control. In Basic, they are there to tear you apart, rip you down to as blank a slate as possible so that they can build you up how THEY want you to be, so that you come out more "uniform" and in the Military mindset instead of a "me" mindset. They are there to make you feel weak, make you feel incompetent and it's YOUR job to prove them wrong and to prove to them during your training that you ARE a good soldier.

    That said, it took some of my girlfriends a little while to feel pretty and confident and pretty again after Basic. Most were so concerned about just getting through A-School (Navy equivalent to AIT) that they weren't really concerned about it tho. They wanted to focus on getting through A-School and getting to their first Duty Station. It took some time for a few to come around (one said it wasn't until she got OUT that she felt girly again, not that that's what will happen to you).

    I think once you're allowed civvies again, once you're able to go out and do things where you can wear girly clothes, you'll start to feel it again. And being dumped via FB really blows. He was a coward and obviously not very understanding and therefor, not worth the waste of time.
     

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