Ex Problems.

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by flip24, Sep 19, 2007.

  1. flip24

    flip24 Active Member

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    Well, I don't really want to call it a problem, but here goes.

    Yesterday, I hung out with my ex, whom I haven't seen in around 6 months or so.

    We just chilled, got some ice cream, talked about things and stuff.

    Laughed a lot, felt good.

    She was telling me how her new boyfriend acts "gayish" with other guys, and that it annoys her.

    Also, he's not affectionate enough with her or w/e, like, she's the one who has to hug/kiss/hold hands with him and all that good stuff.

    I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm starting to have feelings for her...again.

    I know that she doesn't like what her bf is doing, not being affectionate, acting gay with other dudes, etc.

    What could I do to slowly move back into her life, and possibly start over again?

    Halp. :sadwavey:
     
  2. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Why did you guys break up?

    I would recommend against it. You were with her once, it obviously didn't work out the first time...have you or she changed significantly enough that it will work out this time?
     
  3. keysmachine

    keysmachine New Member

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    i refuse to offer advice in situations like this simply because the only reason your haveing these "feelings" is because you don't have any other options. saying you do, would be a lie though and you know that.

    NOW with that said. Don't ever let a girl back into your life after she's left it.. who's idea was it to open up communication again? because if it was her's you may very well be somebody to give her validation and attention. aside from that i'd just advise doing anything like trying to sneak your way back into her life. My guess is she broke up with you

    whatever the case may be just don't, because your in for a world of hurt if you do
     
  4. JustaMeThang

    JustaMeThang New Member

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    So, you have feelings for her. OK.

    Does she have feelings for you?

    Either way, do not pass go until gayish BF is out of the picture. Telling you she is your ex and to stay away is easier said then done, and you wont take that advice anyhow. But do yourself a big favor and dont try to get any closer to her until she is SINGLE and showing definite interest in you, otherwise, you will end up getting hurt.
     
  5. keysmachine

    keysmachine New Member

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    that or she'll just leave you with the feeling of being lonley
     
  6. enfiniti

    enfiniti How firm thy friendship ... OHIO!

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    came in here to post exactly this.

    you dont have feelings for her, you desire feelings you had when you were with her. Stay away from her. If you seperated it was for a reason (whatever it was) stay away and quit doing this to yourself
     
  7. Shadoxity

    Shadoxity New Member

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    good advice given above...

    /thread

    DO NOT get involved again, you broke up for a reason, and my guess is it will come back to that same reason again!
     
  8. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    I dunno what the deal is with everyone else, or me, but my advice is "go for it".

    I think maybe that is because I have always viewed things from an educational perspective. Good outcome / bad outcome, it's still better than no outcome.

    Go get back with her and find out if it was really she you wanted, or just someone to fill the "girlfriend" role in your life, or whatever.

    I don't understand why everyone is so afraid to make a mess
     
  9. Shadoxity

    Shadoxity New Member

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    not afraid to make a mess...

    the point we are on is that he has already "gone for it" so why do it again to wind up int he same heart broken place? if he went for it, it shows that he didnt learn from the out come the first time, what would make you think
    he would learn from it again?
     
  10. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    that's just totally alien to me in terms of where you are coming from... i don't get this obsession with the ending. I play to play, not to "win." That's what what you guys sound like to me, like you are all trying to play to win, build the perfect hand of cards before entering the game. When in fact it has nothing to do with whether you get married or get cheated on or omg get hurt.

    every "go for it" choice i've taken has made me grow as a person, even the ones that ended with heartbreak
     
  11. bobbarker70

    bobbarker70 New Member

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    She has a boyfriend, don't be the lackey. Stop talking to her until shes single and even if shes single again you still shouldnt because your exes for a reason.
     
  12. skurge

    skurge New Member

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    dont let her drag you in, same thing happened to me a month ago.....my X of 3 years


    it wont turn out good trust me
     
  13. muted

    muted New Member

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    I know its shitty advice to givi in the Vaginarium, but dude, seriously, It's the golden rule:

    Never, ever, go back.


    Edit: ^You see?!
     
  14. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    this is the truth. Get the fuck out man. You wanna be the guy that gets tossed around go back to her. You wanna be the guy in charge then you take charge and leave her FAR behind.
     
  15. muted

    muted New Member

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    I talk with some x's once in a while. Meet up for coffee or some excuse to talk about life and shit. We both have SO's, and it's all casual.

    My point is, one can let them back in their lives, you just have to really get over each other and never ever start dating again.
     
  16. Dethfat

    Dethfat New Member

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    dont do it, dont settle. find some new hottie. trust me it'll be worth it.
     
  17. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    If she is interested in you, then I say go for it. Like Johnjohnjohnson I believe that chances need to be taken... If the opportunity presents itself and it is something you want then you mine as well go for it. Better to have attacked an opportunity and fail than to have never attempted it at all; because that hosts feelings of regret.

    Now, the biggest issue I see here is with practicality. She has a b/f and you have no idea if she is interested in you or not. Naturally, it sounds like you were friendzoned and are only going to hurt yourself by continuing this. That being said, if you really like her its not just an issue of being lonely or optionless, then hang with her a few more times and feel her out... she how interested she seems in being with you again.
     
  18. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Why can't people get some balls and get over their ex's before they go back talking to them?
     
  19. keysmachine

    keysmachine New Member

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    my point was don't let a girl back into your life romanticlly.. because its not real and all you'll end up doing is going through a "honeymoon" phase and then it'll be right back in the shitter.

    now once you do get over her or him and you don't view them like that anymore then MAYBE you can start something again friendship or what not still though in the end i always advise against getting back with an ex..

    which reminds me. Why'd you guys break up again?
     
  20. flip24

    flip24 Active Member

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    Stupid reason, she wanted a break, the break turned into a break-up...and yeah.
     
  21. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    AHA! Typical. The girl breaks it off because she thinks she might find better. All of a sudden the next guy she dates isn't that great so she panics and calls you up just "to see how you are doing."
     
  22. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    This is why I feel that people should have the attitude of "if you want to take a break, you will be breaking up with me".

    Because in most cases, this is what happens. The person wants to go after someone else, but is unwilling to be single if it doesn't work out.

    DO NOT GET BACK WITH THIS GIRL. She'll just dump you once she feels better
     
  23. keysmachine

    keysmachine New Member

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    your god damn right here.

    see i knew it had to be her seeking validation and a way to ease her pain and her shattered ego.. once she's feeling better and back on her feet your gonna get the oh so familiar

    i think we should take a break again.
     
  24. keysmachine

    keysmachine New Member

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    you must love pain and suffering. me on the other hand tend to be cold and calculating.. which is why I don't get screwed over anymore. Because I don't give women second chances.

    are you one of those men that gets cheated on by "the love of his life" and she cries to him saying she made a mistake and you take her in only to get cheated on again.

    c'mon dude.. lets be serious here its basic psychology. Everytime you lose something and get heartbroken your not becoming a stronger person your just getting emotionally scarred and then calluses build on that making you immune to emotion eventually it gets to a point where you just shut everything out. Don't be this person.
     
  25. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    if that's how i worked i would also be calculating
     

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