Ex married....

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Gregsaidthat, Jan 3, 2007.

  1. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    So my ex girlfriend and I are really really close. We get along very well for some odd reason. Now here is my problem. She is married! She is married to one of my good friends! Now I have feelings for her and I always have and I can't figure out why. I dont know if it is because I can't have her or something along those lines. Well, I know she has feelings for me because she will tell me all time. Right now her and her husband are having some problems with their marriage and they're about about done with each other. They have seeked a marriage consoular and I dont know if that had helped a lot but it has helped out some. Well, here is something that I have stucked in my head and I cant get it out....I just got out of a relationship and before my relationship started she told me that she didnt want to be married anymore to him cuz he is an ass all the time to her and treats her like shit. Well, she told me that she would of loved to have been with me but I found someone else (I think that was a bad part on my side...I could of kicked myself in the ass for it now) and now that I am single I want her bad! I dont know what to do! Any kind of advice would be great! Thanks!
     
  2. StopDrop&LOL

    StopDrop&LOL "Where The Elite Become Champions"

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    Well, this is why you should cut off all contact from the ex right when you two break up. You probably still have feelings for her, because you want something you cant have and plus you two were intimate with each other. Its hard to lose feelings for someone you were close with.

    You guys broke up for a reason, and she moved on and found someone else. How is you finding another girl ''bad on your part?'' Dont get down on yourself. I stay true to the theory, "once an ex, always an ex." Some may agree or disagree, but thats how i feel about past relationships. I feel though, they can work, but majority of the time they dont.

    If i were you, i would not get in the middle of their divorce. It can be a big mess and they dont need another person involved. If you talk to her, i would tell her she needs to get things situated with her husband first. Put yourself in his shoes. How would you feel if her ex kept popping in the picture when you are trying to work things out? You said the guy is one of your good firends too?

    Just tell her she needs to work on her current relationship and get that situated before she worries about another.

    Its probably not what you wanted to hear, but its the truth.
     
  3. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    The reason why we were done in the first place is because she left state for school. It wasn't like we argued or anything like that. I feel like it is unfinished business!

    Thanks for the advice.
     
  4. StopDrop&LOL

    StopDrop&LOL "Where The Elite Become Champions"

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    Well, if it is unfinished business, then let it happen. Let her get things situated with her husband before pursuing her.

    I mean, why pursue her right away? If its unfinished business and its meant to happen, it will.
     
  5. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    Yeah you right...I want to say that there is some sexual tension between us... I can kinda tell by the way she looks at me and some of her actions towards me....Similar to the ones that she gave me while we were dating. I guess I could say that I am stuck between a rock and a hard place...

    Questions.....

    Do I wait around for her?

    Do I kinda do my own thing just hang out with her like we have been?

    Do I look for someone else?
    (Then when the time comes if she did want to continue I'm in a relationship)

    I don't know.... It has been in my head for the past couple of days and I dont know if I'm blowing this up to more then what it really is or if I'm just confused (I think I am!)
     
  6. Reaver2218

    Reaver2218 Active Member

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    first one is hard to awnser cause if they do end up working things out then you will be stuck just being friends. If you two both have a mutual intrest in being together again it will happen when and only when they are not married again, her being married adds to many unknowns to a relationship/friendship. if I was you I would do what Stopdrop&lol said I would just hang back and let them do there thing if it happens (that they do end up working thigs out) oh well you can look for someone else if it doesnt (they end up not working things out) then good for you both then then you can act accordingly, but dont get in the middle.
     
  7. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    Alright.... I have been thinking a lot about not getting in the middle of it to begin with...but there is something inside of me telling me to keep going! I want to let things work its course! I just don't know why I can't like control that feeling... per say
     
  8. swenjj

    swenjj New Member

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    she is married, meaning off limits:hsugh:
     
  9. StopDrop&LOL

    StopDrop&LOL "Where The Elite Become Champions"

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    Thanks captain obvious. What are you trying to say?
     
  10. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    i think hes trying to say shes off limits? :hsugh:
     
  11. TomBrady

    TomBrady New Member

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    DONT GET INVOLVED UNTIL THEY ARE DIVORCED
    EVEN AFTRER THAT...your good friend might destroy u
     
  12. StopDrop&LOL

    StopDrop&LOL "Where The Elite Become Champions"

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    :rofl:

    Thats what i said in my initial post.
     
  13. huntz0r

    huntz0r New Member

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    That something is called "male ego." It's not your friend.
     
  14. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Oh boy.

    First off, before you consider doing ANYTHING with this woman, wait untily she is fully done with her husband. This means that she has to be divorced, not living with him, not relying on him financially, and pretty much out of contact with him.

    Until she gets all that resolved, butting in will do no good. You'll just confuse both of you, and make the process longer and harder for her. Not to mention, you would be interfering with any chance they have of resolving their own issues (her and the husband), and that is not a cool thing to do. How would you like it if someone moved in on a girl that you were having trouble with?

    And the other question to ask yourself is: how long are you willing to wait around for this woman? Think about it. It could conceivably be years before she gets all this fully taken care of. Are you willing to wait that long?

    The absolute best thing you can do is forget about her for now. Live your own life, go after single women who don't have baggage and relationship problems.
     
  15. StopDrop&LOL

    StopDrop&LOL "Where The Elite Become Champions"

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    One other thing. How healthy is it, after just getting out of a marriage, to jump into another relationship? Just because they're divorced doesnt mean she is over him/has him out of her head.

    It sounds like you really like her too. Would you really want to half-ass the relationship?
     
  16. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    if you try to hook up with a chick who just got out of a relationship there is always a decent chance she will fuck him (ex) at LEAST a few times even while you are hitting it.
     
  17. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    Thanks....A lot to think about and I have to rethink my whole thought process!
     

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