SRS Ex-GF wants me back, considering it *longish*

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by kf4zht, Nov 21, 2007.

  1. kf4zht

    kf4zht New Member

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    Last night I had a talk with my ex. We broke up over a year in a half ago. I was going though a hard time in life, I tried to hide it from her, and when I couldn't anymore, and didn't want her to have to deal with it I broke up with her I figured it would help both of us do what we were holding each other back from. We had a few issues, she was by no means perfect, really pissed me off at times, but I did love her.

    Fast forward to now. I haven't managed to really accomplish anything. I have been seaching for a meaning to life, but only seem to waste time and money. I haven't dated since her, and now I am back at school, but still haven't managed to do anything but just exist. I wasted every good chance I had, and I think karma is catching up to me. My luck has been shit recently, stuff I never even thought I could have to deal with has happened. Most is small, but it is wearing on me.

    On the other side she has been doing great. She finally got her real estate license, is going back to school for a business degree (she couldn't do anything school related before). She is living on her own, making good money, living where she wants to, etc. Apparently when I broke up with her it hit hard and she worked her ass off to fix the problems she had.

    Long story short, she invited me to come live with her if I needed to get away and try living up there. I can tell she wants to get back together with me. And I am actually considering it, but something in the back of my head says no. Anyone had a similar situation that can give me some advice?
     
  2. Bailey

    Bailey OT Supporter

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    She sounds like a nice girl. Don't go live with her though. That would be real stupid. Are you ready for a relationship yet? Sounds like you're in the same position you were in when you broke up. Maybe being with her can lift your spirits?
     
  3. SpectreMatrix

    SpectreMatrix New Member

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    A relationship is the last thing you need to do to sort out the issues you have. Its good to have someone to support you, BUT it comes with too many other things its an emotional nightmare just waiting to happen. You have to find a reason to live and get up in the morning that isn't dependent on another person. Once you find that you will be amazed how much easier things are and how you just stop just exsisting and really live.

    I have been down this road a few times, no good will come of it. I am not saying that you should close that door, just figure out what is holding you back before jumping headfirst into something that will hurt you more.
     
  4. kf4zht

    kf4zht New Member

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    I haven't been avoiding fixing my own problems, I have been working my ass off at it. I got back in school, getting good grades, became a firefighter (always been a goal in life), got away from as many of things that cause problems in my life, started living with no regrets, doing what I want. Started getting in better shape, and so on. But at this point I am just missing that point to keep going, which seems to be a gigantic thing keeping me from being happy. The last time I had it was when I was with her.
     
  5. AlliMae13

    AlliMae13 New Member

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    Im in a sort of similar situation...Im the ex-gf that wants my ex back. We have been getting along great the last month or so and I do want a relationship with him and everything.

    Just take things one day at a time. If you two are meant to be together, than you will be eventually.
     
  6. Redneck Shinobi

    Redneck Shinobi Well Jules, the funny thing about my back is that

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    Viper is right.

    I think you maybe getting defensive, and it's understandable. I think what he's trying to say is you do have issues, or you wouldn't have broke up with her to avoid dragging her down or ran away...etc.

    You sound like you're considering something, so go with it. If its to run away then do it, if it's to stay then stay. You're going to do what you want to do no matter what we say. Good luck with what you get XD
     
  7. ridah626

    ridah626 OT Supporter

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    it seems like both of you are a little more mature than your first relationship. i honestly would never say get back with a ex but you never know. if you broke up on good terms i mean why not? you only have one life to live might as well do it. i mean i got back with my ex and it didnt work out so now we both know that we have a closure finally.
     
  8. Schadenfreude1

    Schadenfreude1 New Member

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    You'd be an emotional liability for her at this point. Get yourself together, and then think about a relationship.
     
  9. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    I say go for it, seems like you have nothing to lose if you yourself say you are currently existing/stagnating.
     

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