SRS Ex Emotions wont vacate

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by DVS Man, Jan 27, 2008.

  1. DVS Man

    DVS Man Where the fuck is Battle Cat?

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    I haven't vented too much on the matter over the past few days. Holding it in till it's a time bomb isn't what I want in the long-run, so here goes.......

    I was in a relationship with a very attractive girl for a year on the 15th of this month. In august of 07, I had to move about 2 hrs east of where we used to live for a job. It was only for about ~6 months, and she was aware. Around November I was starting to feel a mild disconnect from her b/c for one, I could'nt drive up there to see her as much as she would've wanted me to, and also b/c of women down here that I didn't pursue really, but just knew of their presence. I called her to cut it off, reluctantly, and she pretty much begged/pleaded with me to stay w/ her. Even though she was always the one who said that long distance relationships can't ever work, she told me we can make it through this. I saw a lot of promise in her and our future after she said that, so I decided to give this one more go.

    She visited me for New Years, and I gave her this great gift, She was ecstatic knowing the financial predicament I was in. She saw the fam again, everything was great. After some arguing around Jan 10th, we break up on OUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY b/c she was questioning our commitment to the long distance. After she doesn't say "Happy Birthday" to me on the 18th, I call her, we talk for a bit. I tell her that I'm getting a new car, and making things easier and more reliable for me to make this relationship move more smoothly with me driving to and from. She said "I wish you told me sooner."

    Two days later, she says she has been cheating on me, i am fucking puzzled. She apparently since December has been fucking some guy, who she even put on the phone to talk to me. Now I feel like complete shit, totally disconnected from the world mentally. I'm sorry for this huge story, just felt mildly better to get this on paper or the monitor for that matter. Thanks for whoever reads this....:sadwavey:
     
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2008
  2. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    i don't think monogamy contracts work, but it still makes my skin crawl that people so easily betray each other.

    i'm sorry.
     
  3. 04JETTA

    04JETTA OT Supporter

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    . :sadwavey:
     
  4. DVS Man

    DVS Man Where the fuck is Battle Cat?

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    Yeah I know. I guess I have a huge issue with letting go of things. This would be exhibit A, or a pair of shoes that I've used for years, knowing that I need a new pair, I still choose to keep what is familiar. OK, the second example was bad, but you get the idea :o
     
  5. AlohaRacing

    AlohaRacing Freak that bitch out

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    Sounds typical of long distance, man. It's going to hurt for a while until time does its thing. Stay busy and be with friends as much as possible. What you're feeling now will fade more and more with each day.
     
  6. AlohaRacing

    AlohaRacing Freak that bitch out

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    I just noticed you're in NC. My ex moved from CA (where we met) to NC. :hay:
     
  7. DVS Man

    DVS Man Where the fuck is Battle Cat?

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    I agree bout the hanging out w/ friends thing. The pain in my stomach from all this wasn't lingering when I went out w/ a few guys last night. Where in NC by the way? I've kind of a gypsy in this state, Charlotte, Chapel Hill, New Bern, Havelock, Wilmington, and I hope that is the extent of it till I move. I'm starting to feel like NC is like that island in Escape from LA, minus the huge influx of rapists and murderers.
     
  8. AlohaRacing

    AlohaRacing Freak that bitch out

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    She's in Charlotte.
     
  9. DVS Man

    DVS Man Where the fuck is Battle Cat?

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    He said that she's been w/ him since November. He then told me that he was going to shoot me after he threatened me and I said something back. For one, I think he is a telephone tough guy. Beyond that I don't feel like fighting anyone over someone who turned out to be a hateful and deceiving person. I just want to chalk it up as a loss and move on. Basically if he came down here and wanted to fight (minus the gun), if I ended up dropping him in front of my ex and/or his friends, there would be zero end to what he would do. He doesn't seem to be the type to take an ass beating like a man. Plus he knows where I live. My good friend is an ex cop and could help mediate the situation with his Glock .45, but i don't want it to get to that point.
     
  10. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    Sorry man

    :wtc:
     
  11. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    Chalk it up, move on..


    It's the best thing you can do, in the end this lady will know who cruel she was to you, but only I think if you just move on and let it all go.
     
  12. DVS Man

    DVS Man Where the fuck is Battle Cat?

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    Thanks man. Even though I feel like I should as a man, put him in his place. No good will come out of me publically humiliating him, only ominous nights and looking over my shoulder. Only reason I know this is b/c when I was on the phone w/ him, he sounds like a frustrated Slim Shady. I guess I was too white for her.
     
  13. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    I had this happen to me (with a freind actually) and I went nuts, I am into martial arts and I was actually his instructor.. I wanted to kill him, and he never showed his face to my class again. I also called my lady all the time, being ruthless and mean etc..

    I went overboard and when I look back the meanest thing I could've done and the most impactful was not say anything, no contact nothing.. make them think about what they did..


    Burn in hell so to speak
     
  14. DVS Man

    DVS Man Where the fuck is Battle Cat?

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    I guess it's the concept of backing down when I've been made a fool of that is hard to swallow.
     
  15. AlohaRacing

    AlohaRacing Freak that bitch out

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    Just let it go. Cut ALL future communication (or chance of) with her.
     
  16. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    In situations like this you have to play your man card in my opinion.

    What would the stereotypical man do? Cut off all contact, what she did was inexcusable and why waste your time with it? You have your own life, and there are plenty of women out there in the world who you can fall in love with.

    Right?

    Yeah, i know.. :wtc:
     
  17. Anudist

    Anudist Turnin' Jesus on, one lightswitch at a time.

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    This situation really does suck, and I'm sorry you're having to go through it. But, let me tell you one thing that you may have already decided for yourself, she's not worth the time and effort put into feeling bad about it. She played the desperate card when you were wanting to give her a chance to expand her horizons, and she went pathetic on you because she didn't want to be alone. Meanwhile, she goes out, looks for some one to replace you, does so, and makes you TALK to the fucking jackass moving in on your girl.

    You have every right to be pissed off about it and never talk to her again, it's best not to dwell on it, and move on for yourself.

    You know what she's going to end up doing? She's going to end up having a bad relationship with this other guy, and come crawling back to you. Now's your chance to move on and show her what she missed out on.

    Good luck bro, I know it's rough, but you'll be alright. :hug:
     
  18. DVS Man

    DVS Man Where the fuck is Battle Cat?

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    Yeah, I have thought about her not being worth the time. It just feels good to hear it from all of you too. I am now -2 on the long distance relationships scoreboard. First serious girlfriend of 2.5 yrs through HS, we went to seperate colleges, she cheated on me. Same scenario here. What is with these women I find who can't stand to keep their legs closed after we BOTH know what a long distance has in store for us? How did I see a mirage when they were so ridiculously good to me when we lived together...? :wtcslap:
     
  19. DVS Man

    DVS Man Where the fuck is Battle Cat?

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    Hopefully there are plenty of fish in the sea, b/c I'm starting to think this whole body of water is tainted.
     
  20. Anudist

    Anudist Turnin' Jesus on, one lightswitch at a time.

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    Trust us, there are. Many guys give up hope because they get butt hurt over a couple of bad relationships, once you find a good one though, it makes all of the previous hurt worth it.

    Life goes on my friend, hang out with your buddies and go enjoy the single life for a while.
     
  21. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    Totally unrelated but I love New Bern.. :wiggle:



    To the OP, sorry things didn't work out. It sucks to invest time and feelings into someone to only have them thrown back in your face.. :hs: My advice to you is not to dwell on it, and do what you need to get over it. You'll find someone worthy of your all your great qualities, you just need to be patient. Good things comes to those who wait.. :) Not what you want to hear.. Easier said than done, blah blah blah.. I know, but really, I'm sorry, and things will look up :hug:
     

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