SRS ex - but still friends

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Chelle, Aug 24, 2007.

  1. Chelle

    Chelle New Member

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    My bf of 8 years decided he doesnt want to be with me anymore. He would still like to look after me and be good friends.
    We own a business together and property, cars etc.
    My issue is, I love him so much and am very scared to be alone. I am struggling with just being friends and everytime he reminds me I get upset again. He thinks he can still have sex with me and act like we always did. I let him because im weak. But its hurting so much I cant go on like this. I told him and he ignores me.
    How do I get the strength to break free now?:sadwavey:
     
  2. kEVOgt350

    kEVOgt350 Like a flashlight on but lost, my energy's there b

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    You are making it hard for him because you are still attached and offering sex as a means of keeping him close to you.

    He is making it hard for you because he wants to break free, but knows he can still get sex from you so he does.

    Either have the determination to resist your urges or stop seeing him all together. The only other option would be to get back together, but he has control over that decision now.

    edit: i guess i didn't really answer your question. realize you're just torturing yourself and stop it. you're single now. put it out of your mind. if he realizes he wants to be back with you great, but don't expect it. move on as soon as possible or you're just wasting your time.
     
    Last edited: Aug 25, 2007
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    You are materialistically and emotionally attached to him.

    You must make haste and apply the following knowledge to your life. 1. Love has got to go BOTH ways. 2. You can love someone but you don't own them as a property.

    He doesn't love you, he's simply using you. And you allow him to use you. Break it off with the company and with him. Remember on every lock fits an axe. Make up your mind and leave.
     
  4. crunchy_black

    crunchy_black OT Supporter

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    As above.

    It will be hard, but long term you will see the benefits.
     
  5. mg

    mg OT Supporter

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    :werd:


    also, since you're scared of being alone... start spending time with friends and family :)
     
  6. IHAMWETARDDID

    IHAMWETARDDID "We could make babies and accidental songs..."

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    I am wondering how the whole "let's be friends" deal works out too. I do not think I could do it either without becoming upset everything I saw him. I wish you the best of luck and I also suggest hanging out with friends and family and things will work themselves out.
     
  7. QueenOfHearts

    QueenOfHearts New Member

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    I can completely relate to this, although I feel more for you because this only happened to me for a year.
    You will never be able to be with him as "just friends." If he truly feels like the grass is greener somewhere else he won't realize you feel completely different.
    Stop being there for his sex. Stop being there listening to his latest girl problems or all the parties he's been too.
    Go to your family. Father or mother, possibly both and stay with friends. Eventually you will learn to ignore the phone calls and avoid the meetings.
    It'll never leave you, and some nights when you completely feel a lack of attention you'll call him, but the next morning every thing will go back.

    It gets so much better and it doesn't hurt at all. You have to put your head down sometimes, but have faith, someone will be there to make you smile.
     
  8. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    You need to divide the assets and business 50/50 and move on with your life. 99.9% of the time being friends with someone after a LTR like that doesn't work.
     

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