SRS Dumped Girlfriend, am I doing the right thing?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Roasted, May 10, 2009.

  1. Roasted

    Roasted New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2007
    Messages:
    2,801
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto, Canada
    I met my girlfriend a year and a half ago. The first date was amazing and we hit it off right away, however almost immediately on the second date, once the excitement wore off and with better lighting I realized that physically she wasn't really up to my standards. I'm 6'1, I'm into bodybuilding and I am in pretty damn good shape, her? She's pretty heavy, probably close to my weight (210 lbs) and quite a bit shorter, etc. She's not UGLY, and a lot of my friends said she's not bad but she's certainly nothing to brag about.

    To be honest, I should have stopped it right away at that point. HOWEVER, I had some problems sexually, which I won't go into here, and thought that since she was really into me I could use this opportunity to work through them with her (yes, I know, I'm a selfish dick), which is exactly what I did. However, here I was several months later and I developed a lot of feelings for her, we spent a lot of time together, etc. In fact, it turned into a pretty good relationship but I was always embarrassed to introduce her to friends, family, etc. I also, felt like I couldn't settle down with her cause I would feel like I'm settling big time. She is crazy in love with me though and I know she would do anything for me.

    I tried dumping her after 6 months for exactly the reason's I described but I took her back after only a few days cause I felt like complete shit when I did it and I guess I couldn't handle being without her. For a few months after that I guess my feelings were magnified from that event cause I actually felt really strongly about her for a while. However, those same feelings of settling and me not being happy came creeping back, and she started to want more commitment at the same time.

    So here I am now, and a year and a half has passed by since we started dating. I ended up recently going to a club with some buddies and I ended up making out with some random chick. This made me realize that I really don't care about this relationship and it's not fair to her. So I ended it last night, and once again I feel like shit. She talked me into making this a break, even after I told her I made out with some chick. I agreed to meet up with her in two weeks but I don't have any intention of getting back with her. I really care about her and I love being with her BUT I think if I stayed with her I'd always feel like I settled and I'd eventually end up cheating on her down the line, etc. As painful, as this is, I think I just gotta suck it up and get over her, and let her get over me, cause I will NEVER be happy in this relationship.

    I guess what I'm looking for is some kind of confirmation that I'm thinking straight, and I'm doing the right thing.
     
  2. T-R-T

    T-R-T New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2004
    Messages:
    5,427
    Likes Received:
    0
    If you want to make sure you don't get back together with her then you should not meet her in two weeks....
     
  3. JBunni

    JBunni New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2009
    Messages:
    1,040
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    east of here
    I think you are right in several ways. You are a selfish dick, and you are right for finally letting her go after leading her on for 1.5 years. She deserves someone who loves her for her, body and all.
     
  4. Daria

    Daria New Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2006
    Messages:
    5,529
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Ottawa, Canada
    dot

    quadruple 11ty dot

    you did the right thing
     
  5. Ford4Life

    Ford4Life Guest

    So you developed feelings for her, but you are embarassed to show her off? You sound extremely shallow, she is probably better off without you.
     
  6. Roasted

    Roasted New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2007
    Messages:
    2,801
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto, Canada
    Thanks......this is exactly what I'm thinking. I know I'm a piece of shit for doing this. And I hope she doesn't develop massive trust issues because of me now. When she got mad and started calling me names, saying she hopes I die alone, among other things, I actually felt better. I can deal with anger a lot easier then when she says she loves me, etc.
     
  7. polishillusion

    polishillusion New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2007
    Messages:
    1,319
    Likes Received:
    0
    Why did you let a fatty booty call end up like this?
     
  8. Roasted

    Roasted New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2007
    Messages:
    2,801
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto, Canada
    Personal issues, plus being an idiot
     
  9. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    Yeah, you'd be an idiot to meet up with her again. Move on.
     
  10. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2002
    Messages:
    64,128
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Philly, PA
    That was a dick thing to string her along but oh well such is life, get over it and move on do not meet up with her in 2 weeks or the power of the pussy will overtake you
     
  11. SpectraRedZ

    SpectraRedZ New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,650
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Charleston, SC
    Dont bother meeting up with her, its over. Stop leading her on, and both of you just need to move on with your lives.
     
  12. Roasted

    Roasted New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2007
    Messages:
    2,801
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto, Canada
    Update:

    It's officially over. I spoke to her over msn first time since breakup today ( wanted to know if she did ok on her exams of if the brake up fucked her up hardcore....I know, selfish, I guess I'm trying to feel less guilty) . She says she hates me and never wants to see me again, etc. This actually makes me feel better. I'm never contacting her again, at least not for a solid 6 months, as I know any attempt to communicate will only fuck us both up more.

    She says I shouldn't be with anyone till I figure out my own shit, and she hopes I never do to anyone what I did to her......agreed on all points. On the other hand after a week and a half I actually feel pretty good being single. This actually feels right.
     
  13. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    Wow, she sounds totally reasonable and makes it seem apparent that you were a shithead. Congrats though on getting some sort of closure.

    By the way, you're retarded for actually thinking you should possibly contact her in 6 months. What is wrong with you!? Stop being a selfish prick and let her move on; you do the same.
     
  14. Roasted

    Roasted New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2007
    Messages:
    2,801
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto, Canada
    I figured 6 months is long enough for just about anyone to get over someone.....maybe that's not true judging by the other thread......we did a lot of things together and she is a cool person, I'm just saying that I'm not closing off the possibility of being friends sometime waaaay down the line. Especially since she is the type to stay in contact with a lot of exes.
     
  15. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    Let HER make the decision to be "friends" with you in 6 months.
     
  16. kiri

    kiri New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2006
    Messages:
    25,186
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Miami, FL
    just curious- did you actually tell her the reason why you were dumping her?
     
  17. Dahlia

    Dahlia Active Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2008
    Messages:
    27,527
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lexington, KY
    I want to know this too. And if you said you just used her and shit, thats really sad on your part.
     

Share This Page