dont want to lose girl over sex, any suggestions?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by quamen, Mar 6, 2005.

  1. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    Well i havent had sex with my girl since Nov, because it is all my fault. I was extremely nervous and paranoid after we had sex, that she might become pregnant. She wont take the pill, cause she is scared she might get cancer since her family has a history of uterus cancer.

    So it came down to use just having sex with a condom. Ill admit im not man enough to raise a kid, so i dont think im man enough to have sex. So i please her every other way possible, and she seems to enjoy it very well. I enjoy sex myself, but I dont need it at all. By no means is she bad, she is great at sex, but i guess im just a abnormal guy who just enjoys other stuff besides sex like oral.

    She has been really pushing the issue as she needs me to have sex with her, and i dont know how to tell her that im still worried. She says she will take the pill the Emergency one if the condom breaks, but i dont know im just paronoid. Any sugesstions on this issue?
     
  2. shady5

    shady5 Guest

    tell her that youre worried... tell her that youre not ready but still love being with her


    if she wont stick with you because you dont want to have sex, tell her to :gtfo2: , not worth it
     
  3. Ghostaz0r

    Ghostaz0r With my ego, I can stand there in a Speedo, and be

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    Its part of the deal of sex that you HAVE to worry about these things...but you just need to put them aside and have some fun :). You're 23...its not like you're hiding it from your parents.

    You should be fine if she says she'll take the emergency pill...the condom should work all in its own.

    Take it easy...it'll be worth it to put worries aside.
     
  4. Incog91

    Incog91 Guest

    You criticize a person who is responsible and doesn't want someone to have a messed up childhood.

    You need to consult the barrel of a shotgun.
     
  5. Fearan

    Fearan Guest

    Wow, I respect you lot for being man enough to do this. Good stuff.
     
  6. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    Condom with spermicide. Its only like 0.5 percent chance with that type of condom.
     
  7. two30v

    two30v New Member

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    .
     
  8. :smile:

    :smile: New Member

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    i dont think ive ever heard a guy say that before..you must be awesome...but have fun, dont let it bother you just be careful & you can tell if a condom breaks so just keep an eye out
     
  9. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    Thanks guys for all the replies. Well i guess I have so much planned and what my goals to become a reality. With my small business growing, college winding down, and me trying to save so I can have my own place, a kid is the last thing I need.

    I have seen so many people younger than me who got there girlfriend pregnant and are having a really hard time. My mom even said one day to me, if anything happened out of the blue she said this, she was like I would help you out. But i dont feel or dont feel comfortable making a kid If i cant do it on my own, and dont feel like putting her life at a hault either. Right now she is really upset with me because of the sex issue, and always claims nothing will happen.

    She says she will take the pill, but doesnt believe in abortion like after a month or whatever, and I dont believe in abortion either. I rather just please her as much as possible and keep it in my pants till im on my own solid ground and turf. Thanks alot guys.
     
  10. RT/TSI

    RT/TSI New Member

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    I used to be the same way, I had a constant nagging in the back of my mind, I used to picture all of my hopes and dreams being smashed by getting my girl preggo, but after 3-4 months you will realize hey! this shit does work :naughty: time to get busy haha.

    I totally feel you on this man, but you need to relax and just have some fun, you only live once. :)
     
  11. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    Has she consulted a doc about the BC? Maybe a doc can talk to her and calm her worries. I know many girls on BC that members of thier family have had cancer. I think she is just making up an excuse.

    If she wants you to take the risk of sex, then she can take a little risk too.
     
  12. JAME

    JAME New Member

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    There are also other methods of birth control..just a thought. But I think it's great and very mature of you to be concerned. Having a child makes the simplest things in life 10X harder. They are amazing...when the time is right.
     
  13. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    she wont even go to the doctor, she was going to, but then she got to worried and decided not to go. she promised and said if the condom broke, she would take the after morning and if that didnt work the shot and then whatever it took not to have a kid. So i guess im safe, so i assume it is some time to chill out and stop worrying.
     
  14. ImDrunkAgain

    ImDrunkAgain Resident Mental Health Counselor

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    agreed
     
  15. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    And what was her reasoning behind this? Does going to the doc to just ASK about BC also increase your risks of cancer?

    Honestly I think she knows that if she is on BC, she will ahve to take the responcibility every day to take that pill at the same time. Maybe she knows she cant handle that, or maybe she doesnt care enough to try. Also if she goes on BC, and something happens and she DOES get pregnant, there is a HUGE chance that it will be her fault from improperly using the BC. It seems as if she has excuses and not maturity.

    I wouldnt sleep with her until she atleast takes the time to see the doc though. If she doesnt want to make an effort to keep things safe, then why should you make an effort to give her pleasure?
     
  16. sushibug

    sushibug :happysad:

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    i just read my sex ed class section on birth control. and i dont know why she thinks it increases chances for cancer, but its the other way around. it DECREASES it.
     
  17. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    hey i told her that many times before,but iguess since it runs so much in her family, she is really freaked out.
     
  18. Vegasoutkast

    Vegasoutkast New Member

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    at that rate you'll never have sex again bud.

    and just like guys - sex is a important part of a relationship
    and a cause of the downfall of many of them.

    if she is pressuring you that much and you wont give her any
    its just a matter of time before she finds what she needs elsewhere
     
  19. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    well like i said after the long disussion i believe her in her ways if the condom broke of what she would do. We are going to start to have protected sex again cause she needs it in the realationship
     

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