dont understand the whole long wait ordeal for sex when in relationship

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by quamen, Aug 31, 2006.

  1. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    I really never understood the whole long waiting for sex when you are in a relationship. I was wondering what do most people beleive is a approriate time for someone to be in a relationship before they have sex with each or, or anyhting else sexual in manner such as oral sex? MY current gf of only about a month or so, i know isnt ready which is perfeclty fine. My last gf it took like 8 months or so before we had sex or did anything such as oral. Im a very patient person, i am just wondering what most people think about this issue?
     
  2. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    doesn't matter. 2 days / 2 weeks / 2 months, whatever you want.
     
  3. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    There is that whole issue of women being thought of as whores depending on the number of sexual partners they have had in the past, or how long before they "give it up". Women who have sex very soon are frowned upon in society, in their circle of friends etc. Some people think it indicates a lack of self-respect as well. That doesn't even get into the whole issue of pregnancy and STDs. There are a lot of reasons people have for waiting.

    Personally I don't really care. Whatever works for you, works for you.
     
  4. Miss Red

    Miss Red New Member

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    There is no specific time limit.
     
  5. Ms. UnderStood

    Ms. UnderStood New Member

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    It all depends on the kind of women she is. Some women need to feel a connection, some don't care about that.
     
  6. bandwagon

    bandwagon Copy/Paste

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    That would have been my answer, but I call it Anti-slut defence.
     
  7. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    This is true. I'm a guy, and I like to have a meaningful relationship with a girl before having sex...otherwise, it's just not as good. It's like yeah, it feels good, but it doesn't mean anything.

    To a lot of people, sex is an expression of intimacy. And you can't get that intimacy right away. It takes time to build it, and having sex is a way of showing the intimacy and trust that has been developed between two people.

    Also, some people are probably afraid that they would get dumped after having sex.
     
  8. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    :werd:

    Also, some women feel the connection immediately, and some don't feel diddly squat until later. Someone once said that his most passionate relationship started passionately.

    I would never say "diddly squat" in a r/l conversation
     
  9. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    This is definitely true to a lot of people. To some people, intimacy doesn't come without sex (although this is not a very welcome fact to those who are the other way around).
     
  10. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    i wait until i trust the person, and im sure that the relationship will be one that sticks around. i dont want my numbers getting high, for a few reasons.
     
  11. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    i wait until i see the person naked, and have a condom on. then i do the suitor's dance of courtship and make soft growling noises.
     
  12. -argonaut-

    -argonaut- New Member

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    Timing is indeed everything and it does depend on the people involved and how far/rapidly they've progressed in their comfort level with one another.

    Some have got right at it right off of the bat, initially looking for nothing but a quick fix, but finding something that made it worthwhile to hang around longer to development something more than just initial lust.
    Others have given it a week (a fairly common rule of thumb in todays dating arena), feeling intuitive enough to be able to determine as much about the other as they've felt it necessary, i.e., similar interests, determination of a good work ethic, inter-social compatibility, etc., to feel it necessary to take it to the next level to determine sexual compatibility to see if it's worthwhile to invest anymore of themselves than that which they already have.

    Bottom line is that it's different for everyone, you just have to feel for it, and don't miss the opportunity when it presents itself.
     

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