Don't know what to think

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Epiphany, Mar 3, 2006.

  1. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    So I've been crushin on this guy at work for almost a year now. We don't work in the same department. Infact on different floors and there is nothing that we have to work together for. He's 28. I feel like we are on the same level. Something just clicks. We both are extremely sarcastic have the same sense of humor, wise cracks at eachother or towards other people. We've always kind of flirted but he was off limits for the first portion of our friendship.

    Right before Thanksgiving he broke up with his girlfriend of 4 years. It was a long distance relationship I guess for most of their relationship. I think he wanted her to move here and she turned around without talking to him and bought a house where she lived. It kind of fizzled.

    So it's been a few months. He emails me throughout the day every day while working.Just chit chat....since we don't work in the same department. Jokes or funny things that happen. We kind of did this before but I've noticed it's happening more frequently intiated by him. He looks for me when he walks out after work. We had our picture taken together at the company party in January and he kept it. I had to order a second copy from HR :) He asks me to go to lunch every Friday but it's a group lunch. He drove an hour from the city he commutes from to come to my birthday party on the weekend during one of the worst snow storms this winter. My friend who works in his department with him overheard a guy ask who all came and one guy mentioned that he had went and the other guy cut him off laughing and said "well obviously he went, that's a given" and they both chuckled. She also said he's completely quiet all the time except for when I'm around and he never talks to any other females (and there are a lot of hot females where I work.)

    I'm positive he's got a thing for me but I know he's very reserved and kind of on the shy side. He won't make a move! It kind of surprises me because really cute! He makes innocent comments about how I must get hit on all the time ect ect. So last week I sucked it up for the first time ever and made the first move. I gave him my number and told him that we (my cousin, who he met at my birthay a bunch of friends including her husband and his friends and I) were probably going out Saturday and if he was feeling up to it he could come out with his friends if he wanted.

    He shot me an email back within minutes with his phone number but said due to the fact he had his wisdom teeth out the week prior he said he probably wouldn't be doing much crazy that weekend since he was still kind of recouperating... but also said if I wanted to drunk dial him I was more than welcome but I was required to leave funny messages if i got his voicemail so he could use them against me later. :) My friend said he wouldn't even give his number to anyone in their department for emergency calls. Anyway, I didn't drunk dial him. I don't want to lead him to believe that getting trashed and drunk dialing people is normal behavior for me...although it is fun every once and awhile. :rofl:

    So I made the first move. Gave him my number...:noes: Plenty of emails but no calls from him and he hasn't asked me out but he keeps giving me signals that he's interested.... I like a guy who is a little assertive. I think I've made it pretty obvious that I'm interested in him in other ways too. I really really dig this guy... I feel like this is a special one and he's worth allowing for some time and effort but I can't figure out why he's holding back. I'm hesitant to try harder if he's holding back for some reason.
     
    Last edited: Mar 3, 2006
  2. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    He's probably still getting over his ex. 4 months isn't very much time when they dated for 4 years. He probably likes you but doesn't want to get into another relationship right away and that's why he's not making a move.
     
  3. Carpet Liquor

    Carpet Liquor New Member

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    QFT!

    It's difficult to just jump back into the dating scene, especially when you're not sure about signals anymore. Heck they seem to change monthly. LOL

    Also there might be an age thing, you mentioned his age but not yours.

    There's a few other possibilities, like just not wanting anything serious right now, or he might just be shy and unsure, it happens. :hsugh:
     
  4. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    I'm 26
     
  5. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    So lot's of emails today. It was dead at work. Most of the company who work on salary (which he does) tends to take off fridays. He was the only one pretty much that showed up and worked in his department but he said it kind of made him not very motivated. Our department was pretty slow with work and calls.

    The whole day while we were emailing I was hoping maybe he'd ask me to do something this weekend. He kept saying certain things and I was THINKING, "For friggin crying out loud! This is screwing my head up! Why won't you just ask me out!" At the very end of the day he sent me one last one saying he was wrapping up the day and he was going out of town for the weekend. He said, "I should apologize ahead of time, I haven't been out much lately and my tolerance is probably pretty low should you get any drunk dials this weekend. I'm going out of town to visit my buddies I haven't seen in awhile. So just incase ahead of time I'm sorry. :)"

    I just said, "No worries, I'll be looking forward to those. :)" I'm sure they will be very entertaining as he usually is even sober. Maybe he'll gain a little courage along with it?? :dunno:
     
  6. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    ;) after your last email from him, he may use that as an excuse to tell you how he feels when he drunk dials you. ;)

    anyways, this makes me all warm and fuzzy inside :). it really sounds as though he likes you. you know, you could always make another move ;). after being in your shoes a couple of times, i tend to get a little annoyed and start making the moves on my own. :o... yes, it's risky, but it's not gonna kill either one of us :)

    good luck, and keep us posted!
     
  7. moomoo3210

    moomoo3210 Active Member

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    this sounds good.. keep updating us pls.. and all the besT :)
     
  8. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    No calls. :sad2: Hmm... I'm confused. Although...It's not abnormal for them to not go out and just hang out. :dunno:
     
  9. jmezz

    jmezz layin in bed stretchin my pumped quads for hours

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    Armond thread #2 in the making. :)

    Hopin everything works out for you, sounds like you really like him.
     
  10. Kinks

    Kinks Sup. OT Supporter

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    I'd wait a week.. see if he asks you to do anything next weekend. if he doesn't, the following week make another move.
     
  11. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    Thank you for the wishes guys!! I have a really good feeling about this one. He's wonderful. I really hope it works out. Most signs point to yes, I definately think that there is something really there but...I've come to notice that most guys aren't very predictable. I think it will just take some time...I can understand because I know what he's been through. :hs: But he's worth the wait. :)
     
  12. Kinks

    Kinks Sup. OT Supporter

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    I was going to comment on your assertiveness bit before..

    Women LOVE a guy who has the balls to say what he wants, and/or just take what he wants. But the problem is that these guys are often just jerks, they won't make you feel good in the long run.

    Give the shy guy a chance. He might just need a couple of confidence boosters to get the ball rolling. He might even need you to give the ball a couple of nudges and then he can run with it. From there one of two things will happen:

    1) he continues being a pussy. Bugger it, you gave him several chances. Move on. There's a difference between having low confidence through bad luck in the past and flat out having no balls.

    2) he gets his shit together and mans up. Bingo - you just scored a top guy who nobody else was willing to give a go to. And because you did he'll try very hard to make it work.

    good luck with it, it sounds like things are slowly moving in the right direction. you just want to keep that up, without rushing it but don't let things stagnate either! :)
     
  13. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    He's just being shy as fuck, this is a no brainer.

    Can you get him over to my site? To the "Articles" section? There's an article there about how guys *must* ask the woman out.

    Apparently one girl got a guy to come over because they were arguing over if the word "friendzoned" existed or not. They googled it and found my site. Then he apparently read some articles ... yeah, she thanked me later. ;)

    www.Friendzoned.com
     
  14. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    Aww :) I was right. They didn't go out. He sent me this first thing this morning.

    -----Original Message-----
    From: Eric
    Sent: Monday, March 06, 2006
    To: Brooke
    Subject: I wish it was spring.
    Any updates on the Amster? Did you have a good weekend? Mine was alright. I went to Indy and hung out with my buddies. We pretty much hung out at their house the whole time (played a lot of Xbox and had a few beverages, nothing too crazy though evidenced by the lack of drunk dials). Did you go out with Action Jackson?


    Disclaimer: Action Jackson is a girl I've been friends with for a few years. I don't hang out with her often unless it's a group thing because she's known as a little overly wild throughout the company. Got trashed at the company party and tried to sit on the back of our mastadon statue inside the building to get her picture taken. We are very different and he thinks it's hilarious she tries to hang out with me. She asked me to hang out with her Friday.
     
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2006
  15. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    I would have no idea how to get him to your site. :hs: I don't think he really uses internet at home and they monitor it pretty good at work. :p
     
  16. Camron James

    Camron James New Member

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    Just email him the link and tell him to go there, he will go there if you ask him to.
    I am a member there, it's a great site. Informative, yet humorous.
     
  17. Kinks

    Kinks Sup. OT Supporter

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    don't you think that would be a little obvious? I can see that making things a bit awkward if you send him a link to a dating advice site..
     
  18. Achmiel

    Achmiel Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshi

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    have some random person send the link FTW
     
  19. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    :mamoru: yeah I think it would be a little obvious. I'm just afraid of scaring him off completely at this point. If there is a reason he's holding back then maybe it will just take a little time. If he's holding back for any reason then pressure may not be the best thing at this point.
     
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2006
  20. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    It's more than a chance. This guy is great. He is the good guy and to me I feel like he's awesome all around. He's attractive, mature, responsible, we have great coversation, he's hilarious... I just need to know he can step up and take the reigns a little... ya know what I mean?
     
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2006
  21. Kinks

    Kinks Sup. OT Supporter

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    yep, i sure do :)

    i think one technique that might serve you well is a flirtaceous interrogation.. if you jokingly give him "when are you going to...." ultimatums he might get the idea (like "ask me out to lunch" etc..)

    once you get him to yourself you can demand to know whether he finds you attractive and if so, why he hasn't asked you out yet... and when he umms and aaahs you'll just have to be cheeky and say "you'll never get what you want unless you ask for it!". after that if he doesn't ask then yes he's a pussy :p

    anyway, you'll have to play it by ear. can you imagine what our population would be like if there was a single technique that always worked :mamoru:
     
  22. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Most women are looking for a take-charge kind of guy. He's not doing it. Yeah, I totally know what you mean!

    Me, personally, I'd wonder about a guy who plays x-box all weekend. Sounds like he's better at electronic stuff than social skills. I usually recommend women don't date adult children, as evidenced by video game playing ...

    I hope he gets a clue. I think he'll be too shy to do anything unless you make the first move.
     
  23. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    He seems really socially inclined I think. He's very well liked at work. He seems to have an easy time socializing and making friends from what I gathered at my party. He even talked to my family members and seemed to have a great time with them. :dunno:

    My ex husband played video games a lot. We were happy. I'd rather that he did that than jumped at every chance he had to hang out at bars and get trashed. He's got a good solid job, makes a pretty decent living, he lives alone... I think he owns a house. He likes doing things too. He does enjoy going out. I've noticed there are a lot of things we will be able to do together. We have a lot in common. He grew up on a farm. He's not above riding horses, as most guys I've dated are. He likes to. I used to ride. I just see a lot to look forward to. I don't think he's the guy who spends all his free time playing video games at all. He likes to play but I know he's well rounded.

    He did just come out of a 4 year relationship and even though they weren't really together most of the time he hasn't had to date around or worry about this kind of thing for awhile.
     
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2006
  24. Bugginess

    Bugginess New Member

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    haha.... I think this is all crap.

    I think u just said all men should be animals lol.
     
  25. Bugginess

    Bugginess New Member

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    Hmm...................... u italians are freaking creepy.

    I remember this one italian guy who said "you would be dead in italy".....

    He has a point I guess.... but I still think he's crazy
     

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