Dont know what to do need some advice

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Jake The Snake, Apr 11, 2008.

  1. Jake The Snake

    Jake The Snake New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2006
    Messages:
    65
    Likes Received:
    0
    Here it is I have been going out with this girl for almost a year now and we are very close. But she is one of those girls who want to wait till marriage to have sex *sigh* So we havent had sex. Here is where I need help we were talking the other night and got to talking about stuff the bothers us about each other. I told her it bothered me that we have been going out for almost a year and we havent really done anything. SHE FLIPPED OUT!! I dont know what the hell happened cause by doing anything I mean I do things with her but she doesnt return the favor if you get me. We got to talking and she said she might as well go out and fuck some random guy cause she would feel the same way as if she messed around with me. I have no idea what to do I mean I really care about this chick but I mean how much can a guy take. PLEASE help me I need some ideas!!!!
     
  2. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2002
    Messages:
    14,243
    Likes Received:
    10
    Location:
    NYC
    that is not reasonable. She is asking a very very big thing from you and her response to a discussion of the subject shows that she completely does not respect your needs.

    Is she at all considerate or willing to compromise in other ways? How old are you two?
     
  3. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 26, 2006
    Messages:
    4,994
    Likes Received:
    0
    If she wants to wait, thats of course her decision, however her inability to talk about it is NOT okay. Your best bet is to tell her that you need to be able to have adult discussions, that you're not trying ot pressure her but you DO want to talk about it.
     
  4. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

    Joined:
    May 29, 2000
    Messages:
    49,189
    Likes Received:
    6
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    It sucks she's being so immature about it but you really shouldn't have gotten yourself into this situation in the first place. It's obvious that you do not want to wait for marriage to have sex so why would you spend a year dating someone who does? I'm guessing you went into this hoping that you could change her or talk her out of it which isn't a good way to start a relationship.
     
  5. Actvs Dei

    Actvs Dei OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2002
    Messages:
    3,693
    Likes Received:
    13
    Location:
    Austin
    wow
     
  6. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    I'm going to take a guess you are young...in which case, move on.

    It's one thing to be with a girl who holds her virgnity in high standards, but when she refuses to pleasure you in any way yet you give her things in return she is just being a selfish bitch.

    Stop wasting your time with her, you're not going to marry her.
     
  7. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2006
    Messages:
    8,752
    Likes Received:
    0
    Saying what has already been said..if you want sex, and she's not giving it, break up with her and go get. The whole "you doing things to her, but her not doing anything for you" is a HUGE FUCKING RED FLAG!!!

    She's a spoiled, stuck up bitch, sexually. Who wants to be with someone like that?
     
  8. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,467
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    the streets
    if she's not willing to take care of your needs now, do you think that will change when you get married?
     
  9. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,467
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    the streets
    :wtf:
     
  10. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2006
    Messages:
    8,752
    Likes Received:
    0
    To add to this: Do you realize what she just told you?

    You are not significant/important enough for her to consider fooling around with. Somehow, you are down on the same level as a random stranger.

    The spiteful part of me wants to tell you to break up with her, and tell her that "fooling around with her is no more special than fooling around with someone you picked up off the street." That would be in an emotional tone that she could understand/relate/respond to.

    The more mature part of me wants to tell you to break up, don't even bother telling her why, and move the fuck on to a normal woman.
     
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2008
  11. Jake The Snake

    Jake The Snake New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2006
    Messages:
    65
    Likes Received:
    0
    No she isnt willing to compromise at all I am 20 and she is 19
     
  12. Diesel66

    Diesel66 My standards for women is like rent-a-centers stan OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2005
    Messages:
    124,890
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    Kc
    walk away. Not only is she on a complete different page as you, but she just insulted your relationship.

    You are 20, go bang some college slut.
     
  13. sapient

    sapient New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2007
    Messages:
    268
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yeah she dissed you pretty hard man. I don't think I'd leave her right then and there, but I would definitely have a SERIOUS discussion about how out of line and how much of a bitch she was for saying that, and how she's insensitive to your needs, selfish, how you'd like sex to play an important role in your intimacy, and how you're not sure you can stay with her if at least most of these things don't change. If she STILL doesn't want to listen, or says another one of those bitchy remarks, then I'd leave her for someone better. No sense spending your youth miserable, my friend.
     
  14. aim2kill

    aim2kill New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2008
    Messages:
    631
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    deployed.
    :werd:

    your being completly reasonable, she is not ^
     
  15. NCS

    NCS Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2002
    Messages:
    5,777
    Likes Received:
    0
    yeah she's very immature and not putting you high on her priorities. lets say you were OK with her no sex belief, she should fucking BEND OVER BACKWARDS to make you happy sexually in other ways.

    ditch her.
     
  16. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    Ugh, cut your losses and move on man.

    At this point I'm willing to bet anythng you are only staying with her because you keep thinking if you've stayed with her this long...maybe if you stay with her a little longer she'll change...but she probably wont. Meanwhile you could be dating around enjoying your youth. Learn from this.
     
  17. Elphaba

    Elphaba New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2006
    Messages:
    1,002
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Raleigh, NC

    So you've done things sexually to her, and she has done NOTHING sexual to you in return?
    Doesnt she see how hypocritical that is? If it were nothing either way, that might even be better b/c she wasnt taking what she wasnt willing to give...
     
  18. razi

    razi New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2007
    Messages:
    1,061
    Likes Received:
    0
    She's not handling this very maturely (and I'm going to suspect that neither are you). She might be scared about your reactions, or whatever, but you both need to learn to COMMUNICATE.
     
  19. Ep

    Ep Guest

    yeahhhhh.. total cunt
     
  20. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2004
    Messages:
    13,491
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    PINKBOW
    Well.... you should never enter in to a relationship hoping to change them #1. most of the other people responding has been dead on regarding her putting her needs before yours...


    break it off and make it quite clear that it was not the fact she would not give you sex... but because she compaired you to some stranger.
     
  21. Ladybug

    Ladybug Guest

    I'd be really insulted by her closing arguement. It was disrespectful and I'd probably be heartbroken.

    Talk to her about it, maybe lead into it asking why she doesn't think of you as a legitimate sexual partner above a complete stranger.
     
  22. SRT910

    SRT910 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2005
    Messages:
    114
    Likes Received:
    0
    Abort mission.
    Another person they said they assume you are young, i will as well. This is some advice i think really holds true. No matter how much you think you like her, just leave her if your not getting what you want. Move on. I see so many young guys in serious long relationships early in the piece and when it goes down hill they try hang onto it because you "have come this far" or "been through so much" it never ends up any good and you will be happier with someone that you get what you want from.
     

Share This Page