SRS don't know just writing out my thoughts

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by di3soft, Mar 18, 2008.

  1. di3soft

    di3soft Guest

    Feels like I post in here way too often, oh well. I'm pretty sure I'm falling into a deep depression, I don't enjoy going out as I once did, I constantly lose track of what day it is because it allblurs together(m-f full time work and full time school). I have a great SO but I constantly feel like she would be better with out me. I need a vacation but can't afford to miss work and school. Today on the way to class I had the most disturbing thought as I was going 80 on the hwy " I want to speed up and ram the car into the devider" :hs: and :wtf: at the same time

    Don't know guess just needed to write out my thoughts.
    for reference I'm 21, healthy, have a decent job ( I guess ), have a gf, have friends
     
  2. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    The issue is the following, You live to work instead of working to live.

    Are you really happy being so tense and overloaded with work all the time?

    A bow cannot be tensed all the time, it wil put too much strain on the string and it will lose its ability to shoot arrows in a proper manner. Life is about living, what good is it if you work all the time, and can't even spend time with your gf in the weekend? What is your life worth if you focus it on everything exept on yourself? You'll lose yourself and that's no fun.

    You are like a steam kettle, if pressure builds up too much and not having an outlet , the kettle will explode and lose its ability to function. That is why people need to release stress, i suggest you make a period of time in which you say 'this is my time' specially dedicated to me in which you can release some steam by playing golf, or exercising in the gym., and our time specially dedicated to your gf and you.

    I had the same problem, i've put a priority on everything and everyone exept myself, up till the point that i had a death experience into which it eventually became clear to me that survival comes first you need to take care of yourself first, before you can help others.

    You have only one body, and can do only so and so much on one day. If you go over that maximum then your body will surely degrade. Its up to YOU to say 'STOP to here and no further', and create boundries.'

    Its better to take one step back and be happy, then becoming all you can be and being dead unhappy. You first, therefore please take proper care of yourself, don't feel ashamed to create an outlet for you to be alive. Learn to say NO against the factors that would make you overexert your life till the point that they shorten your life span, again create boundries PROTECT YOURSELF , because no one is going to do it for you.

    If you die because you overexerted yourself, you will get a kick afterwards and they'll start laughing at you for giving your life away for such a stupid thing. Don't get me wrong i think its good to have ambitions, finishing school, and putting importance in your job, but non of them are worth to the extend that they devestate your life completely.

    Its good to have some steam on the kettle, some decent pressure will help you achieve things in life, its just a matter of adjusting the heat.
     
  3. Mulsanne

    Mulsanne The Man = Funk Fusion Chaos

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    You're great, but canned responses ftl.
     
  4. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    I remember those days in college. I worked many hours and went to school, all while I could not find a decent job in my field of study.

    I can't really offer any tools to help you along the way other than say that life is much easier after college. You'll be bored all the time, and can pursue the finer things in life. I don't know what to say about the girl because I am all thumbs on that topic.
     
  5. di3soft

    di3soft Guest

    thanks for all your input :hs:
     
  6. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    college pushed me to mentally work harder ever than before. You can make it through this, and its much easier afterward.
     
  7. Redbeard

    Redbeard OT Supporter

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    You are stressing yourself out too much. If she is a great SO, do whatever it takes to hold on to her.
     
  8. bimmer318

    bimmer318 I'm out of applesauce

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    The good thing is (hopefully) all of this will be over and you will be doing a job you love
     
  9. 04JETTA

    04JETTA OT Supporter

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    .
     
  10. di3soft

    di3soft Guest


    well here is the latest that just pushed me over the edge, she cheated on me last night, I feel like complete shit I have no motivation do to anything
     
  11. Timdog

    Timdog New Member

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    Doesn't sound like such a great SO to me. I would drop her and allow yourself to feel down for a little bit, but then start doing something else. Take up a new hobby or something. Eventually, those feelings you used to have for her will go away as you "forget" them. Dwelling on them will only make you feel worse.
     
  12. MissingNut

    MissingNut New Member

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    Yeah, I'd say drop the cheating SO. That will help you get back on the track to a happier life. Holding onto her probably only will make you even more miserable in the long run.
     
  13. di3soft

    di3soft Guest

    I know I should let her go but there is something holding me back, I dont fucken understand my brain I dont understand my heart, Im lost
     
  14. Arclight

    Arclight Hypercube

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    Man up and dump her disrespectful ass.

    Don't be such a doormat.
     
  15. di3soft

    di3soft Guest


    im far from a doormat, the only problem is she has my heart completely, and I am lost
     
  16. Timdog

    Timdog New Member

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    I still don't understand. SHE CHEATED ON YOU. I don't care how much she has your "heart", she's done something that has really hurt you. Do you really want to have someone like that in your life anymore? Like I said, DROP HER. Force yourself to drop her. It might hurt like HELL at first, but eventually, you'll feel fine and will probably be wondering WTF you were doing by sticking with her.
     
  17. 2500

    2500 Guest

    Sounds like normal F/T work and school thinking, lol. You don't have alot of time, or energy, so you don't go out as much. You're growing up. And, you wish you could give your GF more of your time, so you end up feeling guilty and like she'd be better with someone else. Not true, or else she would be. And, if I had a nickle for every time I had a weird thought like "Ugh, i wanna shove this tempo off the bridge for trying to pass me" I'd be a rich, rich man, lol. I'd chill and try not over analyzing yourself. Just hang in there, and try enjoying the journey as much as you will enjoy the end result of all your work.

    edit:
    kept reading.

    I'm terrible with cheating talk, cuz, I took my BF back after cheating, and I cheated in the first week of the relationship, and everything is actually great now and it's been 2 years since I did, and almost 6 months since he did. So, I like to believe love can overcome alot, but, most will disagree and say "leave the bitch." In any event..... I think you have alot on your plate, and, maybe time away from the SO would do you some good. I'm sure shes feelin the stress, and, in this situation, I don't really see a "fix" cuz it's prolly driven by a lack of time.
     
  18. Redbeard

    Redbeard OT Supporter

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    Closure will help you. Move on.
     

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