FRK Does he think he is going to hurt me?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by OoOlAlA, Oct 10, 2006.

  1. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    First I had asked or told my boyfriend to pull my hair during sex. I think the first time we were in the middle of the act and he kind of had a little laugh and did it. After that I had told him to do it. Now if he does it its not really that hard. He is getting better about it. Its not just a tug tug anymore, he wraps it around his hands finally so he is getting better about that. I wish I wouldnt have to tell him when to do it to. I finally did the reverse cowgirl position (I didnt do it before because I thought it would be weird) but turns out I like it A LOT and it would have been a perfect time for him to pull it and jerk my head back:wtc: . I also have asked him to spank me. But during sex he wont spank me hard. When we are just sitting around he will pin me down and spank me until I am beat red. I would really love to have a big beautiful bruise left on my ass after sex, but again I think he is scared he is going to hurt me. Another problem is he thinks this stuff is "freaky" and to me its not, there is stuff that I would like to try, but I dont know how to get him to open up. Some cum got on my hand after he finished off in my mouth and I showed him, and he made a slurping noise so of course me being me I licked it off and then he made a "ugh" noise so I asked if he thought that was sick or something and he said yeah kind of so I laughed and went into the bathroom.

    So my question(s)..How do I get him to open up and get to where I want us to be? This is nothing to me but it seems like something to him so... and Other than saying your not hurting me is there any other way to assure him thats what I really want?
     
  2. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    time.. lol its not an everyday thing that they are born knowing! lol he has to get a feel for it.. like whats too hard.. whats not enough.. lol maybe get a safty word
     
  3. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    also showing him how to wrap the hair around his hand and then pulling
     
  4. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    He has got the wrapping part down, I get so excited when I feel him wrapping it around his hands, now if only he opens up to it more:x:
     
  5. Vixxen

    Vixxen New Member

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    practice and lots of it :naughty:
     
  6. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    ehh give it time.. i like being choaked too :) you sould try that one too
     
  7. BlueSVS

    BlueSVS New Member

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    damn...... i wish my girl liked the hair pulling
     
  8. Vixxen

    Vixxen New Member

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    .
     
  9. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    All in good time yeah...Just having my hair pulled and being spanked sends jolts threw my body and its just...so great..and now I am sitting here alone while he is out of town..thinking about it...oh shit
     
  10. whitecouch

    whitecouch spendin' our golden years in OT Supporter

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    Just let him work up to it. Sometimes these things take baby steps. There are probably things he wants to do that you are not okay with just yet either. Just tell him how much you want to try it and how much it turns you on thinking about it.
     
  11. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    I made sure to tell him I am willing to do whatever he wishes, he just has to say the word.
     
  12. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    and to answer the topic of the question hopefully ;) am i right?
     
  13. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    :) right you are
     
  14. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    he'll open up when you open up.
     
  15. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    I am trying to but sometimes I think he thinks I am crazy...
     
  16. Phantom Empress

    Phantom Empress mmmmmm tasty!!!

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    if he's not comfy trying new things for you after you two have talked about it and communicated then there isn't much you can do. Have you talked about this OUTSIDE the sexual situation? Why doesn't he want to explore this, what are his perceptions on eploring these avenues of play? Bring these things up when you guys talk and maybe it'll give you some insight into how you can open him up to these new things. If not, move on if it becomes a deal breaker for you.
     

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