do girls do my head in, or do I do theirs in?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by SirPidgeon, Sep 18, 2009.

  1. SirPidgeon

    SirPidgeon OT Supporter

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    Bit of wall of text and im actually texting the girl right now still trying to work things out.

    Ok so i met this girl through one of my mates who is good friends with her. He brought her over my place we chilled etc. eventually decided that we both been through some bad relationships so the idea of "cuddle buddies" came about. basically to just be a nice companion for each other while single because it gets lonely.

    only known her about a week or so now. so we tried to organize hanging out again because she lives pretty far away. And i had to cancel on her because of something and she got real upset so i said some things to make her feel better etc.

    So any way tonight she tells me she likes me. now shes had some bad runs with guys usually she says she likes them than they freak out and dont talk to her again. i basically had to tell her that i dont want the relationship thing atm etc etc.

    she got really upset crying etc. ended up saying im just like all the other guys etc. i was really nice about, well tried to be. said i wanna keep being her friend cause i do like her but i went into this without the relationship mindset at all.

    Now neither me or her know what to do with the situation because she doesnt want to talk to me and like me more but she doesnt wanna lose me i want to keep talking to her.

    Does this kinda arrangement ever work out or is it always doomed?

    Cliffs: me and girl friends with benefits she gets feelings for me i have them back but dont want relationship just want companionship a bit. shes upset and now we dont know what to do.
     
  2. Mugen92GS-R

    Mugen92GS-R New Member

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    This is a prime example of why FWB's don't work. One person gets feelings. Sorry that you "feel bad", but she feels worse. Leave her alone now and go your separate ways.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 18, 2009
  3. SirPidgeon

    SirPidgeon OT Supporter

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    I really feel like a relationship will never work with us. at least on my end i dont want one. so best to just completely cut it off and go seperate ways you reckon?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 18, 2009
  4. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    You know what you want and its not what she wants. Whats so hard about it?

    If shes not willing to be your friend unless you are in a relationship with her why even waste your time? You've been adamant and honest about the fact that you want a FWB at most, so why bend now?

    If she doesnt want what you do, dont waste your time and move on. No point in 'stringing' along this overly emotional girl who has had 'bad experiences' and is constantly using that as a leverage point over your head (guilt trip) into making you feel bad for being like "all the other guys"

    Honestly, man up and stick to your guns. You dont want a relationship, she does. You want FWB, she does not. You said you'd continue being a FRIEND and not a FWB/SO, she doesnt want it.
     
  5. SirPidgeon

    SirPidgeon OT Supporter

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    Exactly what i needed to hear i think. Thanks mate. Ive just said to her that i think its best we part ways etc.
     
  6. SirPidgeon

    SirPidgeon OT Supporter

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    Its just so hard for me to be straight up sometimes i never want to hurt these girls. but i guess sometimes you got to do what you want to do. When i was younger i actually said yes to a girl asking me out because i didnt want to reject her lol i know thats bad. but it turned out to be the best gf ive had and we still talk to this day etc.
     
  7. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Do it. :werd:
     
  8. SirPidgeon

    SirPidgeon OT Supporter

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    Its done and she feels like crap i feel a bit like crap. but we will both be fine so i guess its all good.

    Is it my fault girls like who i am so much. argh.
     
  9. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Nope
     
  10. SirPidgeon

    SirPidgeon OT Supporter

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    All good than lol i guess im not as emotionally mature as i thought i was. been ages since ive dated or even delt with a girl quite frankly.

    Cheers heaps mate i actually think i would have just keep tryin to fix things unless you gave me that blunt post there.
     
  11. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Its why we're here. Sometimes honesty hurts but some people are so 'nice' that they dont want to allow the truth interfere with their hearts/emotions. A lot of people have this 'feel bad' complex (as I call it), and when they need to break bad news to someone, they dont simply because they 'dont wanna hurt their feelings'.

    Simply put, you're only lying to yourself and allowing yourself to sink further into a shitty position when you dont speak up against something you dont agree with.
     
  12. SirPidgeon

    SirPidgeon OT Supporter

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    Yeah Im definately like that. Only to a point though. i mean if its something real serious that i know needs to be said ill do it. but like if someone quotes a movie wrong i wont even correct them most the time. You know what i mean right.

    And yeah shes now calling me faggot in her facebook status and acting like im so complete asshole lol sorry for being there for you and making you happy for the last week woman!

    all good its good that she knows it over now so i dont even have to deal with it. all done
     
  13. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    Have you had sex with her?
     
  14. SirPidgeon

    SirPidgeon OT Supporter

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  15. Infection

    Infection Guest

    You aren't wrong. You tell her you are sorry but don't feel the same, and think it's best if you two stop speaking for a bit so you can put some emotional distance between the two. Then, if you feel like talking, you may.
     
  16. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    RUN.
     
  17. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    run for your life, this girl is obviously very fucked in the head :ugh:
     
  18. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    i would say maybe you should tolerate it for a little bit if she was keeping your nuts consistently dry and empty but if shes not fucking you on a regular basis its not worth dealing with a pyscho.
     

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