Ok I've been married for a year and a half. I am currently deployed to Iraq and I am planning on getting a divorce when I get home. My wife is not cheating on me or anything and I love her to death but the problem is she has yet held a job. She is young (18) and I have kind of been leaniant with her but she did decide to get married and take responsibility. I am planning on becomeing a doctor one day and she knew before she met me that I was going to aspire to be something that was going to be a hard path. So I was kind of hoping she would be there in the relationship to help out. But she has yet done so. In the first 6 months I was deployed she developed a drinking problem and spent alot of my money and I basically had nothing when I came home for leave. Which she didnt tell me until it had been going on for 5 months. She had told me she wouldnt drink until I came home and could be with her while she did. So she betrayed me on that. When I returned from leave we made a deal that I would reenlist if she would get her GED and enlist that way we could work together. She wanted to enlist in the first place so it was just kind of incentive for her to get on it. She continued to neglect enlisting and she eventually changed her mind and said she wasnt going to do it. So I am stuck in the army 6 more years while she does what she wants. I took that one too. Then she started cutting again and I begged her not to do it a long time ago but she started again and told me she didnt care what I wanted it made her feel better and she wasnt going to quit. So I finally couldnt take it anymore and I told her that this wasnt going to work. With the way she is and me being so positive and pushing her all the time it just causes really bitter fights and I dont think it should be that way and at the same time I have to look out for myself. I will never be able to be a doctor or anything that I aspire to be if I always have to support her so I just had to call it off. I told her I can't do anything from over here so it is basically in her hands until I come home. She can show me that she does care about helping in the relationship and get her GED and start working or going to school or something or shes gonna end up losing me. Nothing is bitter about the divorce though we both still love each other and care about each other we just know we wont ever make a good married couple and we will probly be better friends. I am willing to take her back someday if she does decide to get her life together. I guess I'm just looking for any advice. Am I being selfish in this or am I doing the right thing and looking out for myself? If anyone has any questions I will be glad to answer them. I am heartbroken over this decision but I feel like its the right one.