Did we break up or not?????

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by jond, Apr 27, 2005.

  1. jond

    jond New Member

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    I hate posting this because I feel I'll probably get flamed with a bunch of 'grow some balls' posts, but whatever.

    So friday night she says since her new promotion at work, shes been working 12+ hours a day, plus going to work during the weekend. That basically she doesnt have the time to give me that I want.

    I asked her if shes breaking up with me, and she said its my decission.
    I asked her again at the end of the night friday if we're broken up now, and she said the ball is in my court.

    That was friday. Sunday I emailed her saying how I think if we could just talk for 10-15 minutes a day, and hangout friday night and sat night, it could work.
    She didnt respond to the email, and we havent talked since friday.


    SOOOO.... My question is what to do next?
    - Do I wait until thursday night and call her and ask whats up?
    - Do I wait until friday morning, and email her asking her out?
    - Do I not call and wait for her to make the first move?
    - Do I just never call her again and find someone else?



    Side notes:
    - We just entered into the 5th month together.
    - I like her a LOT.
    - When we hangout we have fun
     
  2. trigger-hippy

    trigger-hippy Made in Scotland

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    grow a bunch of balls!



    But really, sounds like it's over but she would rather it end as a mutual agreement rather than a dumping. So you should call and give the lets call it off but stay friends speech.
     
  3. Jonnie Boomboom

    Jonnie Boomboom New Member

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    She likes you but feels she cant give you the time you deserve, and doesn't want to be the 'bad' person that dumps someone.
     
  4. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    It sounds like she cares a lot more about her career than you. If you were really important to her, she'd make time for you. You wouldn't have to ask for it. It sounds like she doesn't have the guts to tell you how she feels. If you're a bit insecure, tell her you want the truth and whatever she says you can handle it. Whatever she does say, don't argue. Just keep your head up and be strong. Don't say things like "what if we spent x amount of time together" because that'll only put more pressure on her. Agree with what she says and she will respect you forever.
     
  5. LS Boy

    LS Boy OT Supporter

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    shes your gf... so theres no reason for you to wait for certain days to call or how many times you can call. youre not seeing her, youre dating her--- so call her whenever you want.


    on the side note, she sounds like my gf-----how she puts the ball in my court and kinda push me to break up with her---or better yet, she wants me to make the decision to break up with her.
     
  6. laracroft

    laracroft teh croft

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    Sounds like she's hoping that you will dump her.
     
  7. mina

    mina Bra Burner

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    Break up with her, "never call her again and find someone else". You deserve better, otherwise you wouldn't be agonizing over this. Nothing bugs me more than chicks who don't have the guts to be honest with someone they've had a relationship with, that prefer instead to play head games. I mean to each his own, but this chick doesn't even sound like she'd make much of a friend. Again, unless the sex is really incredible-- i say get out and find someone who really likes you. On the other hand, if you like to play games ::evil:: and since you say the two of you have fun when you're together why not leave the door open for her to call you, if she wants. Could be she's just feeling alot of pressure in her life right now, and her relationship with you has come to feel like just another obligation: kinda like working on the weekends and 12 hour days. Maybe by saying you need some space too, but would like her to know she can call you if she wants she'll start seeing your relationship as less of an obligation, feel less pressured, and want to spend her free time with you. Let's face it ambition's a great quality. So yeah, I agree with trigger-hippy.

    Good Luck
     
  8. jond

    jond New Member

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    Thanks for everyones advise.

    I feel like someone on springer where they cant see through the fog to realize who they're with is a waste of time, and not good for them.
    I wanted this to work soo bad. The first few months were so incrediable. I think we both were really in love. Sad...

    I'm thinking about proposing we be 'friends with benifits'. If were both single, why not? What do you guys think?
     
  9. Yotes

    Yotes New Member

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    Bad idea, at least for when a relationship first ends. It just keeps those lingering feelings in place. I say this from experience.
     
  10. sexhaver420

    sexhaver420 Buying stuff I don't need, with money I don't have OT Supporter

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    grow balls. If you have the following conversation then you will find out all you need to know:

    #1 ask her "Do you even care if I break up with you or not?"
    her response will be something like: Well, whatever makes you happy.
    you should then say: A relationship isnt about one person, its about two people.
    she will say: i guess I dont really care then
    you: So what? do you not find me attractive anymore? Is there someone else?
     
  11. mina

    mina Bra Burner

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    Yeah and when you've finished grovelling let us know how it turns out. :)
     
  12. Girder_Shade

    Girder_Shade OT Supporter

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    Just punch her to the ground, tie her up, throw her in your trunk and drive out to the middle of nowhere, dump her ass and go home. :naughty: :bigthumb:
     
  13. P07r0457

    P07r0457 New Member

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    If you have to ask... then you're not together -- because I guarantee if the dumb bitch does anything and you find out, that's gonna be her excuse.
     
  14. ralyks

    ralyks New Member

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    I'd say she's concerned over whether or not you like her anymore, due to her not being able to be with you as much anymore. Be upfront with her but don't just go off and break up with her just yet. She put the ball in your court, you have to call her to see what's going on.
     
  15. jond

    jond New Member

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    Update:
    Okay, so it gets more complex/stupid...

    I email her thurs saying we need to get together fri and finish this up. She calls me that night and says I took things wrong, that she was just saying she would understand if I couldnt take her working so much, but that she doesnt want to breakup. Okay.....

    So we hangout friday night. Saturday she wants to 'talk' again. We go into it, and shes saying how she doesnt feel confident telling me things, how things arent like they used to be, etc.

    Again, I'm asking if she wants to break up then, and she doesnt, but at the same time, shes saying how she wants to think about things.

    WTF... I'm getting tired of this shit. If she cant see how lucky she is to be with someone like me, then f*ck it. I need to heal and find someone whos not f*cked in the head. At the same time, I remember the good times, and how I used to love her so much... Damn this sucks..


    Advise?
     
  16. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    Don't do anything..... wait for her to respond and come to you.
     
  17. mina

    mina Bra Burner

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    The longer you stay together the harder it's going to be to get out and the more tormented you will be staying in, that is if you can't figure out what the problem is. The way i see it: you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. Love stinks, don't it?
     
  18. Amanda Renee

    Amanda Renee New Member

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    from past experiences... i would probably say break it off and if your meant to be together you will. if your not getting what you want out of the relationship its not worth having it whether or not it hurts to make the break.

    youll learn from it and whos to say you wont figure something out in the long run.
     

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