Demosnat is celibate

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by demosnat, Jul 30, 2007.

  1. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    I have decided to give up something that I have thoroughly enjoyed over the last six or seven years. I'm no longer having sex.

    The reasons for this are as follows

    1)I have a huge, ginormous, crippling if you will, fear of getting close to people. The reasons for this are partially unknown to me, and numerous at best, so they will not be included.

    1a) I however, like to be in relationships. I have previously, and knowingly, circumvented the nasty issue of emotional attachment by simply leaping into bed as soon as humanly possible, this has given me rudimentary intimacy, and comfort, without fear of getting hurt on a large emotional level.

    2)I am at a point where i would like to have a normal, healthy, emotional relationship. One in which the thought of breaking up with the person stirs something besides anger and a really brief, shallow pain. In short, I would like to be emotionally available/attached to someone.

    Now, I knew all of this, well, pretty much my entire sexual life. I actually went so far as to warn several guys I got serious with that "I will probably just leave one day, for no apparent reason, and when this happens, you will be devastated, and I will barely notice" no one seemed to take that seriously.


    SO: I have decided to give up my sex life for a bit, in the hopes of having an actual relationship, complete with feelings and things.

    Without allowing myself to fall back on old habits, i may be able to change how i view relationships and participate in them.

    Thank you for reading
     
    Last edited: Jul 30, 2007
  2. Buttons

    Buttons OT Supporter

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    Damn ... .there goes my chances.
     
  3. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    :rofl: lucky bastard, did you not just read how nuts I am?
     
  4. HouseLing

    HouseLing When masturbations lost its fun you'r fucking lazy

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    nuts is ok if your hot enough :o

    you killed my dreams too:wtc:
     
  5. Buttons

    Buttons OT Supporter

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    psshh... if you knew my dating history you'd know that i only date crazies. :hsugh::naughty:
     
  6. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    let us know what kind of growth this brings you over time
     
  7. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    yeah, all the really fun rides are with the crazy ones :bigthumb:
     
  8. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    Any guy that finds this out will not stick around.
     
  9. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    i kinda tried that once. however i found out the issue for me had nothing to do with sex, and everything to do with maturity level.


    good luck, regardless.
     
  10. Kalypso

    Kalypso New Member

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    Welcome to the club. Although I'm not so much celebrate as I am people-averse, I've had enough of the dumb bitches my age for awhile.
     
  11. busydoingnothing

    busydoingnothing A broken man too tough to cry

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    Interesting...I'm intrigued...

    I guess I won't be making a trip down to Columbus or vice versa anytime soon...unless it's for dinner and conversation, of course.
     
  12. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Hmmm....very interesting.

    Any reason for this declaration other than to break all the OT boys hearts??
     
  13. VinylButterfly

    VinylButterfly In Utero

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    good on you I say! I have been celebate my whole life because I wait for the emotional connection. I wait for love. I haven't found that yet, but im currently in a ltr so we'll see where that goes.
     
  14. Kalypso

    Kalypso New Member

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    Very poor choice of wording
     
  15. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    This doesn't make to much sense to me, because (depending on your age) it's going to be difficult to find a guy willing to have an actual relationship with you that has no sex. PLUS IMO it's not an actual relationship without the sex. You need both things for an actual relationship.

    Either way good luck to you.
     
  16. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    blow me
     
  17. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    'no guy will stick around' crew see PMs ;)
     
  18. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    I plan of having sex after seeing a guy for awhile big, bolded,while, I'm just trying to not jump into bed with any cute guy that I momentairly desire. I'm trying to be less of a hedonist. :dunno:
     
  19. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    I'm sorry, are you a man or woman?
     
  20. the ground folds

    the ground folds rest your trigger on my finger

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    this makes me sad
     
  21. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    Sex is not the problem, my fear of intimacy is. But sex is allowing me to ignore the problem, hopefully this will force me to address that.
     
  22. liquidPoop

    liquidPoop .........................

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    I dont believe you can have a normal healthy emotional relationship without having a normal healthy sexual relationship

    Its one thing to get to know each other a little before sex but its another to go completely celibate for long periods of time. I dont see that as a good way to cope with other problems.

    Plus why punish a good guy that you want a ltr with

    but thats just my opinion :dunno:
     
  23. Durka Durka

    Durka Durka Guest

    i'm sort of the same way, i don't really want to get involved with anybody new because i know i'm just going to immediately drop them.
     
  24. owenstar

    owenstar New Member

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    Jumping in the sack right away isnt ever a good idea...

    That part about walking away should scare you some...

    The girl I have been seeing for a year walked out on me....she wont explain much....but I know she has a fear of being left so she bails before it can happen to her first....it sucks...I feel lost

    The sad part is, that you could lose someone who is perfect for you and will love you till you die....

    I dont know if sex is the real issue for you....good luck
     
  25. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    What is "normal" tho??

    I mean haven't you had a deep connection with another person, either the same sex or opposite, where you were friends on many different levels?? It's totally possible to put off sex and still develop a relationship...it's just that it's sooo common in todays society to hop in the sack.

    Now I'm not saying I would like that type of relationship but actually, declaring one's celibacy can be liberating in many ways.
    Removing distractions so that one can focus on other issues is actually a very valid way of dealing with any problem. It's why we turn off the TV to study or learn something. It's why golfers want it quiet when they hit their shot....it helps them focus their attention.
    lol punish

    Have you seen her bod and read her posts?? She's got a lot to offer beyond just sex!
     

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