Dating Nice Girls: When do they put out?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by ChipOnShoulder, May 19, 2009.

  1. ChipOnShoulder

    ChipOnShoulder New Member

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    Hey All.

    I've dated 7 girls in the past, 5 in college, and two afterwards. All of them put out within the first two dates, some on the first.

    Anyway, i just met a cute redhead who's a bit reserved and conservative. She is a nice girl, and we are very compatible. I'm honestly thinking of trying to go the distance with her, she is the first girl i've ever thought of trying to do so with.

    Anyway, we've known each other for like 1.1 weeks, and have gone on 3 marathon dates, and have made out on the last two. I made the mistake of letting her know I was willing to go as slow as she was willing.

    She's only had 1 serious boyfriend before, but flings are unknown.

    How long do i have to hold out? 50% of my last relationship was long distance, so i'm now the zen master of holding out. My lady friends tell me nice girls either put out on the first date, or they wait a reaaaaaaaaaaally long time to be sure. The whole "look before you jump thing". I guess I wouldn't really know, as i've only dated nice girls in college (different rules apply) or crazy girls after. The girl i'm interested in now is still in college, i've been out for a few years.

    I'm just glad i'm not friend-zoned, as I've made it clear my intentions from the first second i met her. I asked her out literally 5 minutes after meeting her. I've also demonstrated lots of social proof, as I have a decent number of cool friends, some of whom are attractive females.

    Just curious what a "reasonable" time would be before I bring it up.
     
  2. wolfskymoon

    wolfskymoon Guest

    What does put out mean? serious question.
     
  3. ChipOnShoulder

    ChipOnShoulder New Member

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    Vaginal intercourse.
     
  4. Nomad

    Nomad Active Member

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    if you're saying she's the first girl you want to go to the distance with, why does it matter when she puts out? seems contradicting to me tbh
     
  5. Deborah

    Deborah Seeing is believing, but I don't want to know.

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    every one is different! They put out when they feel comfortable enough with you and trust you enough I imagine, it can be 2 weeks, 2 months, hopefully not two years tho. At least this is how I am:mamoru:
     
  6. ww_Crimson

    ww_Crimson New Member

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    Don't fucking play the waiting game if sex has any importance to you man. My last GF was completely happy making out and fooling around a bit until we had been dating for like 6 weeks. Then she got all religious and started going to church every week, youth group during the week, etc.. That lasted for about a month before she got normal again but she never put out. Needless to say it ended.
     
  7. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    1. A week? You're freaking out because you've known this girl a week and haven't fucked her? Seriously?
    2. How is that a mistake?
    3. This is complete and utter bullshit. Life is not black and white.
    4. Reasonable is whatever two people are comfortable with.

    1.5 weeks, man? That blows my mind that you're already freaking out about it. You're obviously nowhere near as patient as you think you are. If you really want to be with this girl then talk to her about it and be honest with your feelings instead of saying what you think she wants to hear.
     
  8. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    yeah dude, fucking talk to her. but before you try that, just turn her on, tease her, she should want it as bad as you
     
  9. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    There will be a long post from me later, but in my experience...

    A girl who is interested and sexually on the same page will try to give me an orgasm within 4 dates. Points are awarded for effort.

    saying ill wait/dont worry about it...etc is a mistake. It puts girls into this frame where they will hold out more because if they think you think its ok to wait 6 months then you are clearly the kind of guy who wouldnt respect them if they didnt make you wait 2 months. They have a bunch of different ways of thinking about this and none of them are good for you. Ooooh. this guy is a serious relationship, i have to guard my heart from hurt and not just jump into bed like i do with all the guys that treat me like shit. :rolleyes:
     
  10. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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  11. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    Seriously, you actually want him to start a conversation about how long she plans to make him wait for sex? :ugh:

    :down: hell no.
     
  12. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    nice girls usually put out on the 13th date. wtf kind of question is that?
     
  13. D7

    D7 OT Supporter

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    You found this to be the case when you were his age? Just curious.
     
  14. PcH

    PcH Guest

    :werd: IMO, it doesn't matter when they do. It's all about progression. But if they put out the first night it's kinda different.
     
  15. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    :rofl: Yes, I expect him to ask her for an exact date and time. Wtf are you thinking? Of course not. I do expect him to be able to communicate his wants and needs effectively though. In my opinion, if you aren't mature enough to talk about sex, you shouldn't be having it.
     
  16. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    when they are attracted to you.
     
  17. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    I am not saying that it's the absolute truth, im saying that it's is my criteria.

    I have absolutely no idea what happens if you date a girl 5+ times with no gratification, because I simply wouldn't do that. I simply don't know how anyone can ignore the fact that it becomes this huge unfun adversarial elephant in the room.

    Sex should be something that two people who are attracted to each other want to happily and freely give to one another. Thats not a universal truth, just my personal opinion and I will seek out those who are like minded and not waste my time on people who are incompatible.
     
  18. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    Sometimes the best things in life are worth waiting for.
     
  19. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    and the best girls won't make you wait

    and the same girl who will make one guy wait 3 months will give it up to another guy on the first encounter
     
  20. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    you don't bring it up unless absolutely necessary

    your job is to escalate physically. so do your job.

    don't attempt to get verbal approval from her before you make a move
     
  21. ChipOnShoulder

    ChipOnShoulder New Member

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    Thanks for the responses.

    Based on the responses, i'm thinking of just staying the course. I think some of you are assuming that i'm a pimply virgin or something. Or sexual imbecile. This is not the case, it's just i'm usually the dominant one in a relationship, as a result can get things to go fast. A risky modus operandi, but i'm not usually a patient guy. The fact i've got a three week business trip to Canada coming up is also messing with my head. My female friends advise me to throw the idea of getting laid before I leave, right out the window.

    Normally, i'd have had the sex conversation, as initiated through indirect banter about previous sexual history or preferences with regards to sex. But like I said, I really like this girl and wanna go far. Seems that she had a bad breakup last year, and i'm her first serious relationship potential since. Her personality type also doesn't want me to risk running my usual MO.

    So i'll just stay the course and be patient, and pretend i'm a pleasure delayer like Tom Cruise in Vanilla Sky. I'd imagine waiting for the girl to make the move instead of it all being me would be a nice change. The reason i'm freaking out is I've never really yielded control, so, this is kinda new to me.

    PS: I also like how this forum immediately jumps to the worst possible conclusion and people project their worst onto others. At least now I'll know what to expect. :mamoru:
     
  22. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    :rofl:

    She only makes him wait 3 months because she likes him... she doesn't care for the other guy which is why she gives it up so fast...
     
  23. ChipOnShoulder

    ChipOnShoulder New Member

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    :)

    I hope this is the case. Except for the 3 month thing.
     
  24. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    .


    .
     
  25. 1979TA

    1979TA OT Supporter

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    There is no set time limit, whenever it feels right for the BOTH of you.
     

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