SRS dating advice... at what point to ask her out?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Kerpal, Mar 10, 2006.

  1. Kerpal

    Kerpal handlobraes

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    First of all, I hope I'm posting this in the right forum. I just need some pretty basic dating advice, but it seems like the people in here are very helpful and really know what they're talking about so I figured I'd get some quality advice here.

    To make a long story short, I recently met a girl that I'm pretty into. I haven't met anyone worth dating in a very long time, so I'm feeling totally clueless here. Really, it's been such a long time that I've been out with a girl I'd even consider dating on a serious level that I feel like I'm basically starting from scratch again.

    Anyway, (and don't laugh too hard at this) I've been talking with this girl online off and on for a couple months now, and pretty much daily since the beginning of February. She finally cocered me into hanging out with her and a friend exactly one month ago. After that we started talking on the phone quite a bit, like for a couple hours several times a week. I was still really busy with work for the next ~2 weeks after that though, and couldn't see her in person again until late February. All this time that we've been talking she's been pretty flirty, but I couldn't tell if she was interested or just playing since she tends to joke around a lot to begin with.

    When we finally hung out a second time, just the two of us, we seemed to hit it off, even moreso than I was hoping we would. I ended up staying over at her place, and we fooled around a little bit although she didn't want to take things too far. That was only 12 days ago and things have been moving along really fast since then. We've hung out every other day in the past week, three of those I've slept over, and recently we've been intimate. I realize that it's still very early to know for sure if she's right for me, but so far so good, so I definately want to see where this could go.

    My main concern is that in the past I've made the mistake of jumping into relationships way too soon and I really don't want to do that again. It's been my experience that even if someone may be right for you, getting too involved too soon can do more harm than good.

    At the same time, if she feels the same as I do, I don't want to put her off by waiting too long to take things to the next level. I already made her wait quite a while to even meet me in person, and again before we hung out a second time. She's been patient so far, but I feel the ball is in my court and at some point I'll have to shoot, so to speak.

    Any advice you guys can offer? I'm realizing I don't even know how I'm going to phrase things when I ask her if she'd want to see me exclusively. I guess that proves just how long it's been since I've met someone that I'd consider gf material. I've been trying to figure out a smooth way to bring this up with her to try and see if we're feeling the same, but like I said, I'm pretty much clueless.

    Sorry for the novel, and any suggestions would be greatly appreciated... :)
     
  2. Kerpal

    Kerpal handlobraes

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    I guess you could say we are unofficially. We really haven't discussed our status at all or even called them dates when we've hung out, but at this point I think that's basically understood...
     
  3. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Kerpal, let me refer you to a place designed to help you with such things. You could also cut and paste your story there if you would like, but it is worth going to simply to read what others have posted and especially the articles. Go to www.friendzoned.com
     

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