SRS confusion/lack of motivation...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by GaveUp, May 2, 2006.

  1. GaveUp

    GaveUp New Member

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    Hrm, please forgive me as this is my first time posting in this section of OT, but lately it seems like my life has taken an odd turn is it's just plateaued, and I feel emotionally drained/dead..and I am not sure if I should feel this way at 23.

    Pretty much started around October of last year, me and my current girlfriend had broken up 2 days after Hurricane Wilma when she left me for a body piercer who lived about 3 hours away. At the time, I acted like it didn't bother me much because it was obvious things weren't going anywhere and such. Of course I was hurt, a lot more than I could ever show, so I pretty much bottled it up and moved on with my life.

    Met someone new and things appeared to be going well. We had pretty much all the attributes of a starting relationship; bring shit to my place, sleeping over, sex and all that normal stuff. Needless to say I fell for this girl pretty quickly, and she appeared to have been doing the same thing. But she remained steady with the fact she wanted to be single and just wanted to be friends from there on....I can imagine this really messed me up (in addition to what the other ex did) and I told her I couldn't talk to her for a while because I can't turn my feelings off with a flick of a switch the everyone from her gender can apparently do.

    I stopped talking to her for a month or so, and we are just casual friends really (but I cant deny after it all I still don't have some feelings for her). But since that I just haven't had much excitement in my life. All I do is work (6 days a week, nightshift), mess around with my car, and band practices. It seems like it has all gotten uniform to me. I have been told by a decent amount of people I bottle up my emotions too much and it is going to backfire and one day I am going to explode and have sort of breakdown.

    Is this normal? Am I supposed to have no desire to be with anyone anymore and be happy with living my life as a "robot", espacially being so young.
     
  2. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    Not normal ,see a counceller and congratulations on that you are finally venting your story here.

    Direction is the keyword here ,

    People often go into circles in their lives , this behaviour has no progress in it and will make people keep repeating the hell that they are in. A progressive upward positive change in life needs to continuesly take place in order for people to grow. You don't want to keep sticking around in that cycle.

    What those gf's depend, never go into a relationship thinking it will work out just because it concerns your 'case' , reality is that a girl can pack her bags and leave any day.

    Tell that other new gf flat out that you want commitment or that you will else move on with your life. You can't build a relationship gf/bf in terms of a friendship. If she is too afraid to commit herself, then you date other girls in the meantime. Life is too short, NEVER wait.
     
  3. deathMiata

    deathMiata New Member

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    Agreed on the whole not normal part with Darketernal, do seek some councelling about it. Heck, if anything, it's not healthy for the mind to stagnate like that.

    As far as the new girl, if she wants to date you then make your intentions clear that you want commitment. If she isn't interested in commitment, then just keep it as friends.

    As far as your perpetual cycle of doing the same thing over again... I can only say maybe you need to break something in your typical cycle and venture a new direction for yourself. It will be a refreshing change and it should be able to maybe give you a new perspective on things.
     
    Last edited: May 5, 2006
  4. GaveUp

    GaveUp New Member

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    How do I go about getting help for this? I obviously have never done this, so who exactly do I have to go and talk to?
     

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