SRS Confused in college.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Finesse, Apr 18, 2010.

  1. Finesse

    Finesse Back for the First Time

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2005
    Messages:
    10,413
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    FedExForum
    I'm about to finish my 2nd undergraduate year of college at my 3rd university. When I graduated high school I was really set on leaving home and going to a school where I knew no one so I could see if I could establish myself away from home. I ended up pledging a fraternity, making a ton of great friends and connections, and overall great grades in school. But still I felt so homesick that all I wanted to do was move back home and go to the local university, which I ended up doing for my second semester.

    I felt like moving back into security would give me a more positive outlook on college and ended up hating it even more. I moved into an apartment with a buddy from high school and ended up only hanging out with high school people, who I realized I didn't even like that much anymore. I still made good grades but at the end of the school year decided it was best for me to transfer again to get away from home.

    Now I've spent a year at this university, which is definitely the biggest/most well established in the state and still have only hung out with people from high school. My grades have dropped tremendously and its not even because I go out all the time, I just feel super depressed and as much as I try to fight it and stay busy it feels like this black cloud follows me wherever I go. Now I'm having thoughts about transferring again but have no idea where I'd even go. Or if I even have that charisma and ability to make friends and acquaintances again. I feel like I've just lost that spark in life. I'm so confused I'm even considering just taking a year from school off, but the last place I want to be is back at home.

    I'm sure a lot of college students go through this, but the depression is eating at me so bad that I've even had thoughts that life just isn't even worth it anymore. Does anyone have any advice? I feel like I can't bring my problems to my friends because no one likes depressed people so I just hide it, and my parents just want me to move back in with them. I just don't know what to do anymore and feel like I'm just not made out for college. Plus everyone talks about how bad life gets after school, and I don't even know what to think. Life doesn't feel "right" even now.

    Sorry if this is tl;dr
     
  2. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Messages:
    18,783
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lansing, MI USA
    The college you're at should have counseling services; you need to pursue them ASAP especially if you're having suicidal thoughts.
     
  3. Finesse

    Finesse Back for the First Time

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2005
    Messages:
    10,413
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    FedExForum
    Its not like that anymore.. I'm totally hopeful now for the best I just don't know when it'll come
     
  4. Clancer

    Clancer New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    21,979
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Seattle
    A lot of people go through this I would think. I started college in 2007 and Im in my 3rd year of my degree but I'll be super senior and wont graduate until 2012. Ive been doing a lot of soul searching and I really hate school. No matter how hard I try I just cant bring myself to sit down and study since I have almost no motivation.

    All I can say is that you still have a lot of life ahead of you. Sit down and make realistic goals for yourself. Dont sit around thinking about doing things, go out and force yourself to reach your goals. Thats helped me a lot and made a light at the end of the tunnel.
     
  5. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2005
    Messages:
    97,795
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Calgary, AB
    It's not uncommon... it's basically called growing up.

    Up until this point, you always had someone to 'guide' you (read: tell you what to do... but make you think it was your idea)

    Now you've started having freedom, and you're starting to wonder what you actually want out of life.

    There's little harm in taking a few years off of school and working, getting a taste of the real world, that is unless you have scholarships which require you to do XXX
     
  6. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,498
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    My advice is to go 2 or 1 time in the year back for a couple of weeks to your family, that way you can regenerate and feel at home, while you can remain your focus on your study. You are suffocating from the restrictions, so you have to set yourself free at some times, so you can relax, and then go ahead with your studies again, knowing that you are not eternally bound to this study, there will be an end to it, it is simular to track and field, the runner can't stop until they reach the finish line, but maby you can apply some short pit stops , i wouldn't make it too long because life is too short to wait. You have to go thru your study as fast as possible because the sooner you get rid of it, the faster you set yourself free.
     
  7. TokenBlackGuy

    TokenBlackGuy New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2008
    Messages:
    34
    Likes Received:
    0
    OP I know exactly what you're going through because Im going through it too. Unfortunately I dont have an answer for you because Im still trying to figure it out myself. Right now Im about to transfer back home to a local university and see how that works out for me. Let me know if you find the answer before me.
     
  8. Jester

    Jester OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2004
    Messages:
    106,286
    Likes Received:
    29
    Location:
    Chiburbia
    it sounds like you guys are looking for answers, but you don't even know the right questions yet

    this might sound a little cheesy but if you can't figure out a destination, then just take it a day or a week at a time and figure out how to enjoy the journey without completely disregarding prudence
     
  9. Jester

    Jester OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2004
    Messages:
    106,286
    Likes Received:
    29
    Location:
    Chiburbia
    also life DOES NOT go to shit after college
     

Share This Page