SRS confidence / whoredom dilemma

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by black jesus, Mar 6, 2008.

  1. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    I've learned recently that its been the same story my adult life, I have so little confidence in the ability to "obtain" women, that I inadvertently sabotage my options.

    However, as I've started to practice picking up women, I'm losing respect for them because they fall for the same shit every time, even though its genuine coming from me. So, rather than thinking that I'm just a likable guy who can attract women, I'm thinking they just believe whatever comes out of my mouth, and considering pretty much any other guy could do it...that makes me the same pathetic guy I was when I was sitting around visualizing the woman I want with other men.

    Thoughts?
     
  2. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    Which side of the fence makes you happier/helps you sleep at night? You can play both sides, and the differences are obvious.

    Take your experience and make a judgement on it I think
     
  3. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    I want the girl, but it may already be too late. I essentially have a last shot at freezing her out and communicating that I have some worth other than her. That's what I want, but I've had this problem all my life and I want it to end now.
     
  4. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    You seem like a cool cat, I dont think it's a problem.. it's who you are.. stop trying to be someone else
     
  5. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    No, its different. The girl can tell me she's going to the grocery store, and I think...

    "what does she need? She doesn't need to go to the grocery store. She's probably going to bang that dude who sent her a myspace message 2 months ago. That explains it. She's been having sex with tons of other people, who I don't stack up to, and I'm going to fail miserably. Now I can never go to the grocery store again because I think of the girl."

    It happens like that every time. I understand that the minute I meet a girl, monogamy is not expected or even rational, but I'd be able to swallow that pill if I didn't feel like I lost all the time, like I was the bottom of the bunch with nothing to offer, the provisional entrant who's there by some statistical fluke.

    So, I started reading books and honed my skills at picking up women. Then, although it should embolden me and make me feel like I could do this, I thought, "wow, if its this easy for me, the girl I want doesn't have a chance against the guys who are really good at this, have something to offer, or just generally better than me."
     
  6. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    I feel the same way, which is why I abandoned trying to get chicks through the asshole route. :greddy: Also because if you're an asshole, that tells girls that it's ok for them to be assholes to you, and when they do that it makes me cry...

    So now I look at what I do have to offer. For example, I'm a vampire freak and take it very seriously. There are a lot of wannabes in the community, but I'm the real deal. Vamp chicks love my beady eyes and natural fangs. In the vampire world, I'm the cream of the crop.
     
  7. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    I don't do the asshole thing. I'm genuine, but learned what the fuck to say, and how to say it.
     
  8. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    You must never blame another, else you lose power and the ability to choose. It is important, as I expressed a number of times to remain detached until an individual proves themselves to you over time. Proven through experience, that the individual will live up to their word will bond you, allowing you to gradually connect. Until then, you are to resist connecting.

    If you connect to soon before they've proven themselves, insecurity will bleed from every wound you've ever had from prior relationships, infecting this relationship until it turns septic. The result is death of the relationship.

    That's incorrect, because it's based on the assumption that women aren't capable of choosing to either accept or not accept what is being said to them.

    Remember, I said birds of a feather flock together. You'll attract women who are at the level you are, so in order to attract better women, you must follow my advice and cultivate a stronger character. To do this means setting rules for yourself when interacting with women, and people in general.

    First, always keep your word, two, always remain detached until someone has proven their worthwhile keeping around. Always be kind, compassionate and polite, but inside -- a wall of separation ought to stay partially erect, just high enough for you to see over it and interact, but high enough to prevent yourself from falling head over heels before he feet.

    To remain secure, requires detachment. You must not let yourself emotionally bond until the bond is congruent with the objective facts, of how the person acts and behaves over time.
     
  9. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    wat
     
  10. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Please don't get all depressed again, that's all I ask.
     
  11. black jesus

    black jesus OT Supporter

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    lol.

    I'm looking at personal growth here...I hope. Hopefully the last 3 months weren't a waste. I'm trying to learn and evolve here. Like I said, I can't keep feeling like this for the rest of my life.
     
  12. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    I dont know, on these forums you can talk about the littlest thing and blow it out of proportion. Is it really that much of a problem? I think of it too..

    Example.. yesterday I picked up my lady from the airport.. I was sitting there waiting for her to come out and there was another guy sitting there.. had a nice watch.. cool nice business shoes I wanted. Was about my age and you could tell he was a rich bastard... could fix anything.. owned his own house.. was the perfect guy right..

    ..
    ..
    ..
    .....


    Then I think to myself.. fuck him.. I AM ME and I like that, fuck you brain! STOP DOING THAT


    and occasionally i'll think like that
     

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