SRS college lifestyle getting tough..

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Dr. Smooth, Sep 14, 2006.

  1. Dr. Smooth

    Dr. Smooth dazed and confused

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    not the academics, i'm a senior, and i'll be graduating with a decent gpa right on time. i cant do the parties much longer. im sick of random chicks and one night stands. its all unfulfilling

    i've built a reputation for myself that reflects how i used to think. i used to be all about the moment, seeking whatever fun i could find at any given time. now, i have goals for myself, and my day to day lifestyle is making it extremely hard to pursue them. my social life has been such a blur for too long...i dont know what to do besides all the drinking and smoking im used to. i cant deal with girls i really like because im too used to drunk sluts, and the possibilty of getting rejected by someone i actually care about is too scary. i feel like if i leave the friends i have, i wont have anything to do.

    help me out OT, its too unhealthy to keep this up. i want to start going to the gym, work more, meet decent girls and form meaningful relationships with them, but i feel like its impossible in my situation.

    this is mostly venting, makes me feel better just to put it out there, but if anyone has anything valuable to say, i'd much appreciate it.
     
  2. Beezure

    Beezure Go Lightning!! OT Supporter

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    your a product of your enviorment (don't mind the spelling )


    you go to college parties, you sleep with collage chicks, find a woman

    EDIT:, from experience i know how hard it is to get healthy(gym, less drinking ect...) remember ONLY YOU CAN DO IT

    however i suggest finding a friend, motivation goes both ways
     
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2006
  3. Dr. Smooth

    Dr. Smooth dazed and confused

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    true, but i'm kind of stuck in this environment for another year, until i graduate. i guess that's not too long, but i dont want to spend another year generally unhappy
     
  4. Beezure

    Beezure Go Lightning!! OT Supporter

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    keep your nose in your books then, stay away from parties, keep busy other ways:bigthumb:

    what makes you happy? find a hobby? :dunno:
     
  5. Dr. Smooth

    Dr. Smooth dazed and confused

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    quality people make me happy, girls, unusual experiences, great weather, good competition, different places, achievement, speed, concerts, any sort of amazing talent

    really, what makes me most happy are breaks from the norm. whenver i do something i haven't done before, or meet someone i like, go somewhere really cool...etc. college is really regimented, and there really isn't much to do on the weekends except party.
     
  6. whelen1

    whelen1 New Member

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    Coming from a guy who has been through 4 years of college and is now working at a college I can tell you this. Its WAAAY too easy to fall into a rut and become complacent with your surroundings. After a while there just isn't anything NEW to experience and especially with being a senior you pretty much have experienced everything by your Sophmore/Junior year.

    You have to up the distance to drive or the money to spend in order to get the same high. For example, my freshman/soph year I was all about the parties because I didn't have to go anywhere or spend a shitload of money. As time wore on my interest in cars increased, I picked up pistol shooting & paintball, and a few other expensive hobbies.

    Best way to put it.... Gotta pay to play!
     
  7. dano

    dano OT Supporter

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    You have to want to change. If you don't feel ready to pursue women that aren't likely coated in five different STD's, don't try it.

    Surround yourself with people who think like you do. I personally have gone from hanging out with people I called my best friends to a new group of friends and I honestly enjoy the new group better. The friends I've had for years are not on the same path I am; none of them are in professional programs in school. I'm the only one. They love to get stoned and drunk 24/7; I don't smoke and I don't like to get drunk that much. As for the new friends, they drink, but socially, and all of them are goal-oriented.

    I feel better about myself and actually feel more mature beyond my years because of the surroundings I've placed myself in now.
     
  8. whelen1

    whelen1 New Member

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    :bigthumb: Well put
     
  9. dano

    dano OT Supporter

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    I try. :wiggle:
     
  10. not your average

    not your average      ¯¯¯¯ ¯¯¯¯¯ ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ OT Supporter

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    I had the same problem but it affected my grades. I'm now back to square one with my GenEd credits after 2 years. After moving home from college I felt the need to move out after a year and i'm living in an apartment now. I'm at the point where I need to make a decision and either fully commit to school or enter the real world and get a full time job.
     
  11. dano

    dano OT Supporter

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    Why? Move back home or split rent with a friend. Move on campus even. Don't give up school because of money. Saying you don't have money for school is the lamest excuse for not going to school. I'm in debt up to my eyeballs in student loans but I don't care because I know I'm getting a proper education and it's well justified debt.

    And I work full-time as a full-time student. It sucks but it can be done, don't give up man.
     
  12. whelen1

    whelen1 New Member

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    To build on what Dano said. If you surround yourself with good people who have the same interests as you, even the "normal" things are fulfilling. Especially when you move out and your on your own, those friends will be the ones to keep your ass outta trouble, or bail you out one of the two.

    I was never big into the party scene at school, though I occasionally went to ones my friends were throwing, and I have NEVER smoked weed... been baked into a room but still. After a certain time drinking/drugs/rampant sex gets old, though any type of sex after college is good!
     
  13. dano

    dano OT Supporter

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    I had my fun freshman year. Undecided between two majors, I rushed a fraternity. I was drunk every single night, but because of well instilled study habits I still got 3.5+ both semesters.

    I just got tired of that entire scene and got out of it. I'm now dual majoring in nursing and biochemistry and I plan on being a trauma surgeon some years down the road. If you met me 3 years ago you'd never expect someone like that to do something with their life. It's all about changing your attitude and being in an environment that will aid you along.
     
  14. not your average

    not your average      ¯¯¯¯ ¯¯¯¯¯ ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ OT Supporter

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    It's not the money and i'm already splitting rent but still pay over $600 per month after utilties. The problem is that I had it pretty good my 1st two years of college and no good excuse for my poor grades. I decided to take some elective classes at a community and lived home for a semester. Unfortunately I didn't follow the guidelines for what I was doing and they denied my request when I re applied. It's been about 2 years now though so it is possible that i'll try again.
     
  15. dano

    dano OT Supporter

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    What do you want to go to school for? If you want to go into a trade or something minor, keep chugging along at a CC. If you want to actually make it in this world, look at going to a larger university because I can tell you the education you get at both is NOT the same regardless of what crap they forcefeed you at orientations for CC.
     
  16. Dr. Smooth

    Dr. Smooth dazed and confused

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    this is extremely well put. thank you

    only problem is, i had to sign a lease for my current house last october (student housing is so fucking lame :ugh:) and, though i live with 7 great guys, i'm kind of locked in for the rest of the year.

    oh well, i bought myself a laptop this summer so i could do work outside of my house, and i guess that's what i'm gonna have to do. pick up extra shifts at work, do all my reading, etc. basically, i'll have to make myself scarce. i wish that wouldn't interfere with meeting people (girls) though.
     
  17. Dr. Smooth

    Dr. Smooth dazed and confused

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    i hear ya man....only problem is, my old car just broke down and i had to take a loan for a new one (gotta drive to work). i'm brooooke now
     
  18. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    To the OP, you sound like you're growing up and looking forward to adult life outside of college. We have all had to go through that....well most of us anyways. At some point the parties and bars and constant "hanging out" just gets old and other things become more interesting.

    What truly sucks about this growth process is the feeling that you may not be able to share you new found interest with your current set of friends. However, there's no reason to completly ignore them or completly change everything about your life. Just become more selective with the parties you want to attend and the types of women you want to associate with.

    For many, many years I felt like I wasn't in control of my life. That I always just went along with what my frat bros wanted to do...which was either drink at a bar, drink at the house or drink at someones apartment. It was always drinking and partying. After graduation, I decided to change and I took myself out of that scene. It cost me some "friendships" but not really....the good friends stayed, the not-so-good friends just drifted off.

    However, I can assure you that if I could go back in time and do things over...the only thing I'd change is going my own way sooner. It's difficult to change and grow but follow your heart and gut about what path is right for you. IMO that's the only way to truly become an independent thinking adult.
     

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