SRS Co-worker has me sprung.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by wicked max, Jan 16, 2007.

  1. wicked max

    wicked max New Member

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    We didn't really talk at all in the year and a half I've been working with her, until maybe november. Anyways december is when we started texting each other..like everyday throughout the day. Now those texts have turned into phone calls. At first i was just sexually attracted to her...now with all this talking has made me feel more I guess. Now I really don't know yet where the hell this is going.. She's 38...I'm 21.. She has 3 daughters (20,16, and 8). I've tried to steer clear actually, but it seems she initiates everything (which I don't mind) She'll be the one to text me or call me. I'll do the same too, but not to the extent she does. I've gotten calls from her at 2am just to talk. Now she has invited me to go out to drink with her, but no real date as been set...just an idea that has been brought up....It seems like an innocent friendship. does seem a little weird though that she picked a "kid" as a friend...maybe I'm putting too much thought into this, maybe it's nothing, but as my title states, I'm fucking sprung. This is so fucking confusing. End Rant :hs:
     
  2. johan

    johan Active Member

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    I'd be surprised if all she has in mind is a platonic friendship.
    Come on. You know that too.
     
  3. Elphaba

    Elphaba New Member

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    WFT.

    However, I also wouldnt be surprised if she's tryin to set you up w/ her daughter.

    What kind of text/conversations are these? Details?
     
  4. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    I agree.

    And usually I'd say 38/21 isn't a problem but she's got a 20 year old daughter............ holy awkward, batman. Have fun but if you're starting to fall for her you better answer some tough questions for yourself right away, starting with "would I be ok dating a woman with a daughter I could have graduated with?"
     
  5. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    I think you should hang out and see where it goes. It might end up being that you will date her daughter!

    I agree. What do some of those messages say?
     
  6. wicked max

    wicked max New Member

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    She's not married. And I do want to date her. As far as her daughter, the 20 year old lives with her bf, and I've never met her. The 16 yr old is a cutie, but too young :o I guess i just want to know if this is more than just a friendship. The problem is I'm so inexperiernce and clueless, so I dunno.
     
  7. wicked max

    wicked max New Member

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    LOL...at first that threw me off too. But now that i think about it, I personally don't have a problem with it at all.
     
  8. wicked max

    wicked max New Member

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    Mostly a lot of how are you...how's your day going. blah blah. She does talk about this other guy she used to be with about a year ago. Now she wants pretty much nothing to do with him. She tells me about how he texts her stupid things like "hello, are you there" or "are you awake". Ironicly she does the same thing...like leaving me text, " are you here yet?" "I got my red pumps on, but they look like sneakers!" "where are you?" "i'm opening up a corona, I see ants, I think they want in my pants" (wtf)lol ..Phone call are pretty much about anything, usually after work lasting about 1-2 hours. She just texted me " I'm sitting at a bar, and there's no one here I know" to which I replied " you need company?" :dunno: Like I said I'm fucking confused, and really don't know what to do.
     
  9. Lateralus

    Lateralus New Member

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    If she's not married I'd say go for it if you're interested, maybe it will turn into something, maybe it won't.
     
  10. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    She wants more than friendship. If you REALLY think you'll be ok with her having a kid who's months younger than you, go for it.

    :fake:edit: expect HUGE amounts of shit from friends and family
     
  11. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    You'd practically be gaining a sister and a daughter at the same time.

    Something to think about.
     
  12. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    I'm My Own Grandpa


    http://www.metacafe.com/watch/54702/im_my_own_grandpa/



    Now many, many years ago, when I was twenty-three,
    I was married to a widow who was pretty as could be.
    This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red.
    My father fell in love with her, and soon they, too, were wed.

    This made my dad my son-in-law and changed my very life,
    My daughter was my mother, cause she was my father's wife.
    To complicate the matter, even though it brought me joy,
    I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy.

    My little baby then became a brother-in-law to Dad,
    And so became my uncle, though it made me very sad.
    For if he was my uncle, then that also made him brother
    Of the widow's grown-up daughter, who, of course, was my stepmother.

    Father's wife then had a son who kept him on the run,
    And he became my grandchild, for he was my daughter's son.
    My wife is now my mother's mother, and it makes me blue,
    Because, although she is my wife, she's my grandmother, too.

    Now if my wife is my grandmother, then I'm her grandchild,
    And everytime I think of it, it nearly drives me wild,
    For now I have become the strangest case you ever saw
    As husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa!
     
  13. wicked max

    wicked max New Member

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    another problem is that recently she has told me that she feels heartbroken, and she has to let go of something, but it's going to be so hard..When I inquire, she doesn't want to talk about it, or changes the subject..WTF SERIOUSLY!!! This is getting complicated. I'm cutting ties here now. I'm not going to put up with fucking games..she either wants to or not. Anyways I'm going to drop it. My last 8 months have been horrible, I don't need to add to the fire. Thanks for the insight guys. This is life.
     
  14. johan

    johan Active Member

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    You're confused, huh? Why? Her intent is pretty clear.
    So if you want it, do it. If you don't want it...stop it.

    But personally, I say you should do it. Wrap it up. No pregnancies.
    The only way you're going to learn about life, is to LIVE IT.

    Just so long as you DO something. Damn simple choice here.
    You're not marrying her. Just don't have any babies with her. (Yet)
    Take care of that, and you're golden.

    Now get going.
     
  15. wicked max

    wicked max New Member

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    Well after I said I was going to stop it with her, she calls me, and i answer :doh: anyways I just got off the phone with her ( 3 hour convo). I did get her to open up about why she was feeling sad.. Pretty much her not actually having a valentine..(her last real one being about 8 yrs ago) Well i guess now I know what to do.. I'm going for it.
     
  16. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    hate to sound harsh...but at the rate you're going, I think you're starting to shift from "possible romantic interest" to "therapist". The more you do this, the more she will rely on you as a friend in a support role.

    Keep this in mind. You don't HAVE to be her therapist. You can certainly recommend to her that if she is going through hard times, and needs someone to talk to, she can go see a professional counselor.

    Otherwise, what could happen/could be happening is that she is valuing your time for therapuetic reasons...and she becomes dependent on it. You might misinterpret this as romantic interest, and start getting attached to her. Then, when she tells you "you're a great friend", or "I think we should just be friends", you're crushed.

    Seriously. Stop being her therapist and escalate things. Do you want to keep having 3 hour phone counseling sessions with her?
     
    Last edited: Jan 18, 2007
  17. wicked max

    wicked max New Member

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    It wasn't really a counseling session i would say. we just talked about what was bothering her for about 5 minutes, the rest of the time, we were just talking pretty much about everything, laughing, cracking jokes. Anyways I think I forgot to mention that we're gonna go out on our next day off, which is this coming tuesday. :wiggle:
     
  18. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    Keep it lighthearted - if she's serially pursuing young guys at work, she may be trying to fill a hole in her life that was created by something else. Where there's a hole, there's usually a pile of dirt.
     
  19. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    So what'd she say back when you're like "you want company?"
     

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