SRS Can't cope with pressure and stress

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Reukie, Mar 21, 2008.

  1. Reukie

    Reukie ...

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2002
    Messages:
    178
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    ...
    3 years ago I failed college because I couldn't handle the pressure of doing projects and making deadlines. It didn't help that I was pretty much alone that time and didn't have anybody to help me.

    Now, I'm in a new school doing surprisingly well... however, when I started doing my thesis everything just started going down the drain. I worked my ass off on one term just to have my paper rejected the next term. They gave me a chance to do it again, but this time I just didn't have the motivation anymore to start over.

    It's two weeks before the deadline and I still haven't done anything for my paper. I keep procrastinating, thinking that I really will fail again like I did in my old school. I don't sleep well. I sleep every 5-6am and wake up at noon feeling like shit. I feel irritated and hopeless all the time. I started eating more than usual and have now gained more weight (which is just great considering I am already obese).

    I even started cutting again; it was something which I did after I failed and got kicked out for the first time. Maybe I just can't handle situations like this.

    Yeah, um thanks for reading (if you did). I just wanted to vent. I'm not really expecting any reply. It's 7am here, I haven't slept and I just can't call and talk to anybody.
     
  2. Simple

    Simple Sexy Beatch

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2001
    Messages:
    68,987
    Likes Received:
    63
    Location:
    Edmonton, Alberta
    develop a plan of attack for doing your paper, schedule time that you are going to devote to it, stick to your plan. execute.
     
  3. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2006
    Messages:
    32,407
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    OKC
    You seem to be looking for a way to just make your paper happen without any effort on your part. In fact, this thread is just another step in a long line of steps, that you have taken that hasn't helped you write your paper yet.

    Look it's not that complicated....you aren't writing your paper for a reason....IMO that reason has more to do with you not enjoying your major. Fine...change majors.

    Don't make the mistake of thinking your past performance has to do with anything other than you. You are making decisions that aren't progressing your through your degree. You are the one cutting class and not doing homework. You are the one that keeps procrastinating.

    So don't say, "Well I just can't pass" or "I can't deal with stress"....bullshit. you don't want to deal with it because IMO you are looking for an easier/softer way. You want something for nothing.

    Now this is either caused by being in the wrong field or you may have come from parents that simply didn't teach you the value of an education....so you don't care about learning....you just want to get through the classes with as little inconvenience as possible.

    That strategy has gotten you shitty grades and that will lead to shitty jobs.....then you'll have a shitty life. Ok....but make no mistake about it....that IS your choice. As the rock band Rush says, "If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice."
     
  4. Reukie

    Reukie ...

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2002
    Messages:
    178
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    ...
    wow, thanks for the replies. I suppose i am looking for a way out. I do realize the value of an education, I just can't seem to get myself to start working. You're right, I don't like my major. But i'm hesitant to switch since i will be starting all over again. I was supposed to graduate at 20. Now I'm 23 and still studying while all my friends have graduated.

    As for shitty grades, it's actually the opposite. I am constantly on the dean's list. Suppose you're right, maybe everything else prior to the paper has been easy, and now that it got a lot harder, maybe I just lost motivation, maybe I just want to give up. It didn't help that I worked my ass off last term for a paper only to have it rejected. But hey, it's my fault ultimately. The blame's on me.

    Um, by cutting, i mean, the "other" cutting. Thanks for the replies again. It's 4am here now, I have no one to talk to.
     
  5. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2006
    Messages:
    32,407
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    OKC
    What other cutting? Cutting yourself with a knife? If that's what you are talking about....you need professional help, immediately. Go find it.

    It doesn't matter what your friends are doing or how they are progressing in life. Shit I knew people growing up that had all their shit together early on. I was a late bloomer. In fact, my first degree took me 8 years to get because I didn't like the work, I wasn't motivated and therefore, I didn't work hard.

    Then I got a job and I was trapped in a life I hated. I couldn't quit my job because I had a mortgage and a car payment and I wasn't qualified for any other type of work. Not only that, I was too chicken shit to decide for myself what I wanted to study.

    Hell I always knew I liked computers and I always knew that I learned that stuff a lot easier than many people. Yet I was too much of a pussy to pursue a degree in that field. However, later in life....when I was in my mid 30s, I realized that unless I grew some balls and made my own decisions about the course of my life....that I would just "end up" somewhere and I may or may not like it. If I didn't....the chances of me changing it were small.

    So I decided to make a choice. I went back to school and pursued a degree that I wanted. I worked my ass off and it was fun. I made excellent grades and just accepted a job that with an excellent company making more money than I've ever made.

    Look...you want to write your paper....write the fucking thing. You're unhappy with your life? Change it. Don't just sit there and cry about it. Make decisions, work hard and pursue your dreams.

    Or...you can just accept a miserable life like so many do. They don't even realize it's well within their power to change their lives.....they just accept that life sucks.

    Well fuck that noise. I don't accept that at all and fuck anyone that tries to convince me of it. I've created a new life for me and my family and it's been some of the hardest, loneliest work I've ever done....but I didn't do it alone. Now I'm going to start reaping the benefits.

    You can too but it isn't easy and it isn't free. You'll have to decide and use your will to keep you on track....no matter what anyone says. It's difficult but you can't imagine the feelings that I'm feeling right now. It's incredible and worth all the effort it took to get me here.

    The choice is yours to make.

    I think it was Shakespeare that said, "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation." Fuck that shit....I ain't most men.
     
  6. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2006
    Messages:
    32,407
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    OKC
    Oh and regarding working your ass off on the last paper only to have it rejected....what do you think that most people in life never experience a set back? HAHAHAHA oh man...yeah there are those who truly sail through life but they are the minority....the majority have to adjust and overcome.

    I've had some very serious set back in my pursuits of a better life. However, I've never let them stop me. I learned from my mistakes and tried to NOT repeat them. It's humbling and difficult work but I've learned a lot about myself and life simply by studying my mistakes and trying to find out why they occurred, so I'll never have to repeat them.

    This is one reason I watch pro golf. When a pro golfer makes a mistake, they don't make it worse by letting it get them down and depressed. They don't cry about a shitty shot and how life sucks and how they'll never accomplish anything. They damned sure don't blame it on their inability to deal with pressure and stress. Everyone has pressure and stress.

    The thing that golfers do.....accept the mistake. Try to learn from it....then let it go and move on, trying to hold those lessons in their mind.

    Very often, if they hit a bad shot....they follow it up with a much better shot and it's that shot that usually keeps them from making matters worse.

    Don't compound mistakes with more mistakes.

    It seems to me that's exactly what you're doing with your paper. You worked hard but they rejected it.....so you'll show them. Kind of like saying,"Fuck me? NO FUCK YOU!" or "I'll show you bastards how stupid you are for rejecting me.....I won't do shit"

    You know....you aren't hurting them at all with that attitude. You're only hurting yourself.
     

Share This Page