Can you enter a relationship knowing that person has cheated?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by dan7532, Aug 15, 2008.

  1. dan7532

    dan7532 New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    387
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    St. Louis, MO
    Can you enter into a committed relationship with a person who you know has cheated on people in the past?
     
  2. vodkacollins

    vodkacollins New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2008
    Messages:
    1,816
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    CdM, CA
    yep. ive done it twice. once ended horribly (and he cheated on me too), the other is going just fine
     
  3. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2004
    Messages:
    65,631
    Likes Received:
    486
    Location:
    In a van down by the river
    Time to change the name of the Vag to the "Cheatanarium" :rofl:

    I'll repost this:

     
  4. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2006
    Messages:
    65,506
    Likes Received:
    1
    No.

    There are a lot of reasons for this but the short answer is no.

    I even asked my gf near the beginning of our relationship if she'd ever cheated before. Granted she could have been lying, but I was doing my due diligence.
     
  5. SirBoss7

    SirBoss7 Life is a tragedy to those who feel and a comedy t

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2008
    Messages:
    936
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    College Station, TX
    It's hard to keep feeling and rationality separated in this case, but I'd probably find myself being hard-pressed to risk the pain of entering a relationship with someone who'd cheated before.
     
  6. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    Have to know the exact cheating situation first to determine. I was cheated on in the past so in all honesty if it comes out that the guy I am dating cheated like a real douche on a past gf I'm most likely going to be skeptical about staying with him.
     
  7. Joybang

    Joybang New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2007
    Messages:
    3,553
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    216
    That really seems like an awkward question to ask someone, unless you kinda know them already.

    Edit: By kinda know I mean you already have knowledge they cheated on someone.
     
  8. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2004
    Messages:
    65,631
    Likes Received:
    486
    Location:
    In a van down by the river
    No, it's not awkward at all.

    It's not something you ask on a first date, but it's something you find out (much like the other stuff you should be finding out to check compatibility).
     
  9. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    Well it's not something to ask on a first date, I was more picturng asking a guy I had been dating a few weeks or whatever.
     
  10. dan7532

    dan7532 New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    387
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    St. Louis, MO
    Please post your counter-point. You said it depends on the situation, then gave a situation where you'd feel like leaving. What situation of past cheating would you accept?
     
  11. Jarg0n

    Jarg0n New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2007
    Messages:
    197
    Likes Received:
    0
    Nope.
     
  12. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2004
    Messages:
    14,518
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Chi-Town
    Generally no.

    It depends on the situation though. If I am really into her and she cheated on a guy she had only been dating a month or so then I might consider it.

    If she ever cheated on a guy she was in a serious relationship with though, there's no way in hell.
     
  13. Diesel66

    Diesel66 My standards for women is like rent-a-centers stan OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2005
    Messages:
    124,888
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    Kc
    had one girl admit to cheating on her bf with her boss in his office. ON THE FIRST DATE.


    yeah, that got her marked down from possible gf to just a fuck toy.
     
  14. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2006
    Messages:
    65,506
    Likes Received:
    1
    It's like some girls just carry around giant signs that say "I'M A WHORE" in big bold letters.
     
  15. dan7532

    dan7532 New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    387
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    St. Louis, MO
    That's funny
     
  16. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2004
    Messages:
    65,631
    Likes Received:
    486
    Location:
    In a van down by the river
    Yeah, some of them literally.

    I mean, whenever you see a girl wearing those pants with the letters on the butt, she might as well just be stamping "I'M A WHORE" on her forhead.
     
  17. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2006
    Messages:
    65,506
    Likes Received:
    1
    I was referring to a girl telling a guy on their first date that she cheated on her bf by fucking her boss in his office.

    I'm sure "it felt good at the time," tho.
     
  18. TuopaT2008

    TuopaT2008 New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 30, 2008
    Messages:
    350
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Nevada
    All humans who are not ASEXUAL are capable of cheating, given the right set of circumstances. So, if you are so high and mighty that you believe this could never happen to you or to someone you love...then you are setting yourself and your beloved up for failure. Life is a bitch and sometimes people cheat on you and sometimes you cheat, too. Sooner or later, it will happen.

    So...what you need to do is make sure you are entering into relationships that are worth it and then give the relationship all you've got. There's nothing more you can ask than to give it your best every day. If someone loves you enough to stay faithful for the long haul, then you are blessed!
     
  19. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2006
    Messages:
    65,506
    Likes Received:
    1
    ^ It's a probability game.

    Someone who has cheated is more likely to cheat again.

    By removing those people from your potential relationship pool, you are lessening the chances that you are cheated on.
     
  20. TuopaT2008

    TuopaT2008 New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 30, 2008
    Messages:
    350
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Nevada
    Okay, well I'm nearly 40 and it is damned near impossible to find anyone at my age (who's honest) who has not had some experience with having been cheated upon or cheated.

    So...I'm just saying LIFE EXPERIENCE says the probability is there.
    (And I don't think you lessen the chances of being cheated on...that's like saying saying that every time you get in a car, you have a chance to get in a car accident, and that it makes sense to drive less often to decrease the odds. The truth is that you are working with the exact same odds every time you get in a car and drive. See what I mean? You start at even odds each time.)

    Please don't think that my point means that I condone this behavior. It is not okay in my book.

    There are character flaws that some have and in other cases, there's some understandable reasons for the affair (e.g., sick spouse, extreme abuse, etc.) What's important to know is: is this person honest about their own behavior? honest in a way that would mean they've learned from their mistakes? or are do they justify and blame, meaning that the behavior is likely to happen again?
     
  21. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    Put it this way-most likely no matter what the situation was I'm most likely going to look at him differently. Cheating shows a sign of weakness in morality and loyalty IMO. Unless the story was something along the lines of he and his ex were on the outs, breaking up already and both parties knew and she had also cheated....then yeah, I might overlook it. OR, if he cheated one night with some girl he didn't know (drunk) and then told and broke up with his gf the next day I'd at least appreciate that more than him dragging out his relationship and keeping the cheatng a secret :mamoru: I don't know.
     
  22. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2006
    Messages:
    65,506
    Likes Received:
    1
    Someone having been cheated on isn't a disqualification (except in rare cases when it's indicative of having psychological issues that manifest themselves through relationships, such as women who only date abusive men and somehow each guy they date beats them worse and cheats on them more than the last one because they're subconsciously seeking out these kinds of men. In that case it is a disqualification because it's not worth your time to date such a woman and honestly even if you did, because of her psychological makeup she would leave you if you treated her well, but that's another thread).

    Your premise is flawed. In a relationship you do not have the same odds of being cheated on each time. If you date one person with a history of cheating and one person who has never cheated, your odds are greater of being cheated on in the former case. It's not like flipping a coin and each time you have a 50/50 chance of getting heads. Coin flipping is an independent event. Human's propensity to repeat the same behaviors over and over again is not.

    It's ok to cheat cuz your spouse gets sick? :wtf:
     
  23. jmezz

    jmezz layin in bed stretchin my pumped quads for hours

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2004
    Messages:
    11,130
    Likes Received:
    7
    I wouldn't seriously date someone who I know has cheated.
     
  24. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,398
    Likes Received:
    482
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    People can change, it depends on how well you know and trust the person.
     
  25. fray

    fray New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2006
    Messages:
    5,282
    Likes Received:
    0
    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
     

Share This Page