SRS Can "let's be friends" yield positive results?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Euclid, Aug 13, 2007.

  1. Euclid

    Euclid New Member

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    I've been dating a girl casually for a couple of months since I moved to this city. She's basically my only friend here. We've been having sex but I am not very attracted to her, and I'd like to pull the relationship back into "friends" territory so I can start dating other people.

    Has anyone had success with this sort of thing? Or can I expect to lose her as a friend when I tell her that I want to see other people?
     
  2. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    :rofl: this won't end well at this point she's fallen for you and keeps hoping it will turn into a relationship
     
  3. Killuminati

    Killuminati New Member

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    I am trying myself to do something similar myself. But it is not going well.
     
  4. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    Once you've crossed that line from frienship to gf/bf, there's no turning back. Now in the type of relationship you are currently in that is tho.
     
  5. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    first off, why do you feel you can't date other girls?

    have you agreed to be exclusive with her?

    do you stay the night at her place and/or does she stay the night at yours?
     
  6. Killuminati

    Killuminati New Member

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    What if she was my best friend before we got involved? I am currently trying this its not going well so far. :hs:
     
  7. AkaiOokami

    AkaiOokami Hero of the Hounds

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    Because when you're out of high school/college, and you become an actual "ADULT", you stop walking on people's back and start treating them like humans with actual feelings.

    He said they sleep together.
     
  8. AkaiOokami

    AkaiOokami Hero of the Hounds

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    I think you need to be upfront in a kind and considerate way.

    She may be very hurt.

    And it may turn ugly for a little while.

    but if you hang in there, keep up communication, and show her you genuinely are interested in being a great friend to her, hopefully she'll understand you just need more.

    DO NOT TELL HER "You were the first girl I met. Now I need more".

    Maybe something along the lines of, "You've always been there for me, but now I need to see what else is out there and grow a little bit. Maybe the future still holds something for us, but right now I need something different"

    However, if you go out and screw someone else immediately, you've basically fucked yourself over.

    Good luck man.
     
  9. Killuminati

    Killuminati New Member

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    Nah man I wasn't the original threadstarter. This is a chick (my best friend) who I got involved with who is married. We are not involved anymore because she is focusing on her husband. It has been ugly for 6 months now!! All we do is argue when we talk.... But I know how much our friendship meant to each other. We are gonna try to make it work but I don't know if it will man. And I'd be lying if I said I did not have any feelings for her but I just want to be her friend again.
     
  10. AkaiOokami

    AkaiOokami Hero of the Hounds

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    Aw man, that's a tough situation.

    Still, the same applies. Just focus on both of you doing what needs to be done, and maybe give each other a break so the friendship can soak in, but still maintain open communication!!!
     
  11. AkaiOokami

    AkaiOokami Hero of the Hounds

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    Yo,

    I meant replied to another members input, but I think the same still applies to you as well!

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Killuminati [​IMG]
    What if she was my best friend before we got involved? I am currently trying this its not going well so far. :hs:

    I think you need to be upfront in a kind and considerate way.

    She may be very hurt.

    And it may turn ugly for a little while.

    but if you hang in there, keep up communication, and show her you genuinely are interested in being a great friend to her, hopefully she'll understand you just need more.

    DO NOT TELL HER "You were the first girl I met. Now I need more".

    Maybe something along the lines of, "You've always been there for me, but now I need to see what else is out there and grow a little bit. Maybe the future still holds something for us, but right now I need something different"

    However, if you go out and screw someone else immediately, you've basically fucked yourself over.

    Good luck man.
     
  12. oatmeal

    oatmeal New Member

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    Chicks are weird dude especially if you have had sex with them… things get complicated and the friendship suffers.

    I was with this girl and our relationship was strictly sexual. We only called each other to hang out when we wanted to bump uglies.

    What was weird about the whole thing is that, when she was with a guy she would call me all the time and let me know what was going on, but when I was with another girl she would get pissed.

    Being friends is really hard when intimate emotions are shared and then shattered with the ‘let just be friends’ speech… we only lasted 6 months and now we don’t even speak to each other.

    Who knows, things might be different for you and the two of you could end up being friends. It won’t hurt to try, besides if you are not happy with how things are going it’s best to remove yourself from the equation….
     
    Last edited: Aug 14, 2007
  13. Killuminati

    Killuminati New Member

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    if open communication is her yelling then we've done that.:hsugh:
     
  14. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    There's your mistake.

    I've never understood why, much less how, a guy could have sex with a chick to whom he isn't very attracted.
     

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