Can I get some feedback on these lyrics?

Discussion in 'Entertainment' started by Jadix, Mar 7, 2007.

  1. Jadix

    Jadix The Nice Guy

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2006
    Messages:
    7,877
    Likes Received:
    0
    I know it makes much more sense to post recordings, but we dont have the money for it yet.
    Spoiled

    It will be a long day
    So dont forget your shell
    You wouldn't anyway
    Gotta make the sale
    Put on your new pair
    of faded jeans
    that and your torn cap
    you just bought last week YA!

    chorus:
    we're all sedated
    completely wasted
    I'm feeling naked
    get me a blanket
    Im just too lazy
    masterbate me
    catch me faking
    like im mating HEY!

    What will the others think?
    Maybe that you're a fag
    But your shirt is pink
    So you're a real man
    Good thing for the holes
    proving experience
    Too bad we all know
    you're just delirius YA!

    In Jesus' Name

    I'm so afraid
    I'll do what you do
    I'll say what you say
    I'll think what you think
    We have the truth
    I will not stray
    Ill sell my soul
    In Jesus' name

    I dont like fun
    Its all a sin
    I hate my friends
    for the lives they live
    I want to give myself
    I like to hate myself
    And I would kill myself
    In Jesus' name

    This means war
    They're to blame
    Mary's a whore
    God is great
    This means war
    Our children trained
    to kill them all
    in Jesus' name
     
    Last edited: Mar 9, 2007
  2. Jadix

    Jadix The Nice Guy

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2006
    Messages:
    7,877
    Likes Received:
    0
    nothing eh? Could you tell me the lines you hate the most?

    Sitting by myself on the sidewalk
    Thinking how I'm cold as hell
    I wish I could get my mind straight
    Ya I wish my fate wasn't real
    I want someone to speak without a lie
    And tell me that I'm gonna be fine
    Its funny how time can move so slow
    When you've got nowhere to go oh oh

    Tonight its storming
    Nothing is warm but
    I've got coins for
    The liquor store and
    All these forties mean
    No good mornings but
    its so boring ya
    boring boring

    Walking by myself on the boardwalk
    Looking at the ocean swells
    I wish I could buy my own island
    And forget about the horror land
    People ignore the ugly ones
    I feel like im an alien
    I dont remember the abduction
    but i was probably just fucked up
     
    Last edited: Mar 9, 2007
  3. American SuperBeast

    American SuperBeast New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2006
    Messages:
    644
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lehigh Valley, Pennsylvania
    here ill give some feedback
    it sucks.
    concept lyrical quality and just about everything is bad
    try again
     
  4. Don Ganja

    Don Ganja Drunk Driving > *

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2006
    Messages:
    4,333
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Life feeds on life
    my clothes are so old and worn they are starting to become trendy
     
  5. Jadix

    Jadix The Nice Guy

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2006
    Messages:
    7,877
    Likes Received:
    0
    :wiggle:, thanks for the opinion
     
  6. Jadix

    Jadix The Nice Guy

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2006
    Messages:
    7,877
    Likes Received:
    0
    :rolleyes: , do you not find it odd that people buy pre-worn out shit and think its cool?
     

Share This Page