broke up with my gf v. update from months ago

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by krazywulph, Mar 30, 2008.

  1. krazywulph

    krazywulph Guest

    She's been getting fucked up to a point where I need to babysit her every time she goes out. I told her last time that she needed to act mature and stop embarrassing both of us and treating me like shit, but she did it again last night, so I told her I couldn't do it anymore. She took it rough. I feel pretty bad. Your thoughts ot?

    here's the original http://forums.offtopic.com/showthread.php?t=3631191
     
  2. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Good for you.

    No need to be with someone who can't act like an adult.
     
  3. Xin

    Xin OT Supporter

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    Good job. When people resort to heavy drug/alcohol usage to cope with stress in their lives, they tend to bring you right down with them. If she wasn't respective enough of you to at least work on toning it down and work on not getting to be an unmanageable mess everytime, then you made the right decision. It's unattractive when people show that they could give two shits about their health/body/life.
     
  4. krazywulph

    krazywulph Guest

    I agree. I still love her but I hate who she lets herself become and she doesn't have any control over it. I've tried talking to her and calming her down but it never worked. Last night she was even doing some really inappropriate things in front of my roommates and while black out kept talking shit about me in front of them! she's in tears today, can't believe I'm breaking up with her, cause I'm her one, and her saying that makes me feel even worse. But there's only so much I can take, right?
     
  5. Vanilla Tarantino

    Vanilla Tarantino OT Supporter

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    Oh man, I went through that shit. My ex would also get to the point where she didn't know what was happening. God that led to some...interesting times...(e.g. her getting pissed at me that I wouldn't have sex with her in a public place on campus...AFTER a police vehicle rolled by not 5 minutes prior - when I said no, she responded, "Well, _____ fucked me in *part of campus*"...that was awesome...)
    To mirror what has already been said, it's bullshit and not anything you should have to put up with. It's one of the big reasons that I broke up with my ex. You're there to love her, share times with her, and yes, support her if need be, but you shouldn't have to take care of her that much, ESPECIALLY if you're taking care of her because of things she's doing to herself. You are fully justified in breaking up with her over this. Do not EVER stick with somebody because you feel bad for them.
     
  6. KiddX

    KiddX Tigth as Piston In Ferrari Engine!

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    There is not a "." big enough to convey my agreement.
     
  7. Xin

    Xin OT Supporter

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    She has alot going on with her life, and since she resorts to those things to that extent, it shows she's not happy with herself, and we all know if you aren't happy with yourself, the relationship isn't going to work out well. If you talk to her about it and she's completely unreasonable about it, she's probably taking it like you're lecturing her, trying to take her 'fun' away and viewed as a threat, or honestly doesn't give two shits.

    Of course you're her 'one' and she 'can't believe it', because her normal conscious is in play now and probably vaguely remembers what she becomes when she feeds her routine addictions so she probably feels a slew of shit from her thinking "what did I possibly do wrong?" to that last attempt desperation mode people tend to go into when a relationship is about to end.

    In short, life is all about YOU, and if someone is trying to bring you down, or causing you immense stress and shows no signs of wanting to communicate and work on things together, it's time to cut the cord. Now your next battle is not giving into whatever she may say when she's sober and turns into that sweet loving girl again that tries to get you back. Keep at it.
     
  8. krazywulph

    krazywulph Guest

    :werd: She said she wanted to change and be a better person for herself and me, but it's not the first time we'd have the conversation, and she broke my trust. She said she'd do anything to have me, and I think that's true, but after all that happened I just cant look at her the same. We had been dating for about 15 months
     
  9. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    Good move breaking up with her.
    At least you tried. Now it's time for her to make huge mistakes and HOPEFULLY learn from them (the hard way apparently).

    Now let that weight fall from your shoulders and have a good time :bigthumb:
     
  10. althepirate

    althepirate Talk nerdy to me.

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    MotherFuckin' :werd:
     
  11. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Go find yourself a woman and move on from that mess.
     
  12. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    What thoughts, it's pretty self-evident... You no longer wish to take her shit, good for you? what do you want here affirmation? Good boy! Here's a cookie.
     
  13. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    All you guys say is "Good move on, good" when it comes to threads like or even remotely similar to this. Almost every single problem people come here with you say "Why waste your time".

    :rofl:
     
  14. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Because...why waste your time?
     
  15. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    I know it isn't that simple.

    Good relationships dont just magically pop out of the ground, every single successfull and wonderful relationship i've seen in my 26 years on this planet has had times like this and other "not-so-good" times where one or the other couldn't take something anymore or someone went too far etc.. If you left everyone when something like that happened you'll be going through everyone you date eventually.

    Is that to say that statement is stupid? No, I agree with it in some cases.. but it's thrown around here as almost "filler".
     
  16. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    There's a big difference in fighting to keep a relationship together because you love someone, and fighting to keep a relationship together because you are afraid to be alone/don't think you can do any better.
     
  17. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    Yeah I know that, when it comes to relationships and how women act, you're an experienced lady and I consider one of the highest class of women. I'd love to date a gal who had the mentality of you, you seem very loyal, strong minded, knows what she wants etc.


    When it comes to men and how we think and act, you dont know dick compared to me. In this case are you wrong? Maybe not, in my case? Maybe you're right, but every single person is different and rome wasn't built in a day. If you can see yourself with someone forever, do what you can, give it every chance you can handle and figure it out for what it really is. Don't be so QUICK to tell me, everyone else and your own mind "fuck it, move on find someone else dont waste your time" like it's some general thing that can be applied to everyones problems with a SO.
     
  18. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    LoL, I know im about to get yelled at
     
  19. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    I think it's obvious however that most of the people who come to the Vag are not in love with their SO enough to fight for them, hence why everyone tells them to better themselves and their SO by moving on. Why should they fight when it's obvious they aren't willing to? We're not here to tell people "you should love her unconditionally and overlook the fact that she gets too drunk and acts stupid to the point of embarassing you!" No, we're here to point out that she should grow up and he should move on because obviously it's a big enough issue in his head and he's only stayed with her because he pitied her in a way. Those posters who truly love their SO and want to make it work dont listen to us and do fight for it.

    If someone does listen to a message board and dumps their SO just because we said so it proves that they aren't in it for the long haul, therefore why should we tell them to stick it out? Every story is situational of course, but I'd say 90% of the people who come in here and make threads about their relationship troubles point out enough that they aren't right for one another. That on top of the fact that they are usually between 18-22 and shouldn't be settling down for life as it is.
     
  20. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    Fair enough, good point.

    I love you
     
  21. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    Because most people that make these threads are under 23 and fighting for someone or something when half the time they are not even sure what they are fighting for. If you have to ask yourself "is this worth fighting for? Is she worth my time?" then usually the answer is no.

    And mind you, I am not one to give up easily. I have been fighting for a year now to keep an LTR (of several years) going strong because I believe nothing worth having in life comes easy and if the two people still love one another then it is ALWAYS worth fighting for.

    Most of these people making the threads in question though are not really in love... or they have fallen out of love. Dragging something like that out is only making it worse for everyone. It is often best to just realize you guys are not in love anymore or never were and end it... the sooner you end it the sooner you get over the s/o and can live your life and take advantage of being younger and having tons of options.

    90% of the time with these threads people don't fight for the relationship because they love the person or have faith in the potential of the relationship... they fight because they are afraid to be alone and afraid of what life is like without that comfortable presence there. Despite if love exists.
     
  22. Exiled

    Exiled New Member

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    Yeah, another good point.
     
  23. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :ugh: Didn't I already say all of that :ugh:
     
  24. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    nothing spikes her interest like refusing to have anything to do with her

    be prepared

    she is going to come after you HARD.

    if you don't resolve to stand strong, you will find yourself right back where you started (with her again)

    she will tell you she will change, and everything will be different.

    You can't believe her words. You can only judge by her actions.

    Her actions have shown that her unacceptable behavior will continue. Do not be fooled by her words.

    She has treated you with disrespect. If you allow her to get you back, you are disrespecting yourself - and no one else should respect you either.

    Don't try to be friends with her. You think you are being nice and giving her sympathy, but it will only hurt YOU in the long run. You have to do whats best for YOU here. Let her worry about her problems, they are yours no longer.
     
  25. krazywulph

    krazywulph Guest

    damn, i really connected with you here. i feel you man. problem is we have some of the same friends, not any of my close friends, but im likely to run into her on weekends and such. i guess i just cant let myself care...
     

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