breaking up with girlfriend

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by strik9, Apr 25, 2008.

  1. strik9

    strik9 Verbing weirds language.

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    i don't know how to do it

    backstory....started dating this girl about 6 months ago. shit went good at first (as always) but the last month i pretty much don't like her anymore. we constantly argue, i'm miserable around her cause of it, and we haven't had sex. well the other night i got drunk and ended up cheating on her. i know you will all probably flame me here for that but it doesn't exactly pertain to my problem.

    i want to break up with her. problem is that i don't really know how to go about it. if i tell her the truth (she makes me miserable and i cheated on her) it will probably hurt her. plus its the end of the semester and i dont want to get her all depressed during finals...but i really am annoyed. she isn't staying the summer and when us still dating was brought up she didn't seem too optimistic about it.

    i guess the question is...should i tell her the truth, hold it in for 2 weeks and break up with her then, or just break up with her with a bs excuse like i cant be in a relationship?
     
  2. HuskiRuski

    HuskiRuski Cardinal Fan

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    Usually it's better to tell someone about this kind of thing right away, but it might be a better idea to just spend less and less time with her while finals are going on, letting both of you focus on school. Then as soon as the semester is over, break up with her.

    If you break up with her now, it might hurt her studying because she'll be really depressed, and will make her do poorly on her finals. I know it's a shitty thing to 'live a lie' for 2 weeks, but in this case it may be the better idea.
     
  3. jkiley07

    jkiley07 New Member

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    Wait until after finals, ask her how she feels about the relationship and where it stands in her point of view, and when it's your turn to give input, say it's not working for you
     
  4. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Wait until after finals.

    If you do it now and she takes it hard, it could mess up her performance on her finals, and you don't want that.
     
  5. audrey

    audrey New Member

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    I say tell her the truth. I wouldn't be able to hide something like that. I wouldn't be able to sleep at night.
     
  6. Mulsanne

    Mulsanne The Man = Funk Fusion Chaos

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    tell her now,

    Penn state finals are a joke ;)

    I wonder if you're someone I know :noes:
     
  7. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    you wont last two weeks before you have a fight and blow up, and shit hits the fan right in the middle of her tests.


    better to do it now, so it's calm and as far in advance as possible so she can focus when she needs too.
     
  8. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    she is going to be hurt no matter how it goes down

    if it were me, i would tell her that i have come to the realization that it will never work out between us, so we should go ahead and end the relationship rather than spend more time in a relationship that will not last

    then get the hell out of there. she's going to be upset. it's not your place to console her. she will call her mom and get with her close girlfriends for comfort.

    then just be all business when she contacts you (and she will).

    nothing spikes her interest like you having nothing to do with her, so she is gonna come after you HARD. be prepared and stick to your decision

    if you backslide and get back with her or keep having sex you are just causing yourself more problems and drama down the road
     
  9. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    if she asks why it won't work you can either:

    1. not answer

    2. tell her some version of "its not you its me" (I wouldn't go that route)

    3. tell her it doesn't matter because it won't work out anyway so there's no need for further discussion (my choice)
     
  10. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    Don't need to tell her you cheated on her, but telling her that you're no longer interested in a relationship and are breaking it off, should do just fine. Good luck.
     
  11. vodkacollins

    vodkacollins New Member

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    i totally agree.

    if you try to fake it and pretend you want to be with her for the next 2 weeks, then its going to confuse her even more when you end it. to her it will seem sudden.

    i'm not sure you really could fake it that much, and why should you have to? you have already been unhappy for a month, thats enough time to decide for sure you dont want to be with her. finals might actually be a good distraction for her

    just tell her its not working anymore and that its over and leave. shes going to be hurt no matter when you do it, so you might as well just get it over with now
     
  12. strik9

    strik9 Verbing weirds language.

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    :noes:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
  13. strik9

    strik9 Verbing weirds language.

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    sounds like a good idea

    thanks everyone :bigthumb:
     

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