Best friend and Ex putting me in weird situation...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by 2000GT, Feb 28, 2005.

  1. 2000GT

    2000GT Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2001
    Messages:
    5,773
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    Vancouver
    I broke up with my girl almost a month ago. Great girl, but not for me in the end. During our 8 month relationship she became good friends with my 3 best friends. In fact, I hated her friends so much, they were bad people, I made sure my friends new that it was cool to hang out with her if they wanted. (My friends are good peeps and have there shit togethor, so I thought it would be good)
    Now that me and her are not togethor, I said its cool that she still hangs out with my buddies, they are each others friends now. However, nights like last night she went to one of my friends houses to watch a movie, and it got super late, so instead of driving home, she crashed there.
    This happened once before, but she slept on the couch and my buddy in his bed. Last night they both slept in his bed on opposite sides apparantly.
    I trust they wont or didnt do anything, and I dont even question that, but it still makes me uncomfortable. I feel like my limits are being tested, and I am not sure what to do.
    She is 21 and he is 25, I am 23... we are all adults, but I feel guilty for being uncomfortable with this.
     
  2. JustaMeThang

    JustaMeThang New Member

    Joined:
    May 3, 2002
    Messages:
    1,677
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Long Island, NY
    If you trusted that they wouldnt or hadnt done anythin together, you wouldnt be uncomfortable with her sleepin in his bed. IMO, girls dont sleep in the same bed with a guy that they arent somehow involved with, when there is a perfectly good couch within range. I know Id take the couch over sleepin in the same bed, just seems like it would be more comfortable on the couch, get me? Who knows, I could be totally off base....You have nothin to feel guilty about, your wounds are not healed, its all fresh and I think regardless of what you can admit at this present time, you do indeed have doubt.
     
  3. 2000GT

    2000GT Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2001
    Messages:
    5,773
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    Vancouver
    well, no I really dont have doubt, I KNOW they wouldnt do anything. But I do feel jealous of my friend, as much as I dont wanna be with the girl, I miss her a ton. I would love to sleep beside her, but I know I cant. As for her, I feel bitter and harbour resentment for putting me in this position.
    The couch was a no go this time cause my buddy has a bad back and cant sleep on it, and she is allergic to the material on it and get stuffy and coughs as she learned the last time.
    There was a night where both her and my friend were at another friend of mines house and they all ended up crashing. she slept on the couch there and my buddy who she stayed at last night slept on another couch.
     
  4. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2005
    Messages:
    20,480
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    heres the deal. do NOT mix friends and girlfriend. two different worlds. then situations like this would never come up.
     
  5. 2000GT

    2000GT Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2001
    Messages:
    5,773
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    Vancouver

    Its always been important for me to have a girl who likes my friends, so I dont feel like I am choosing one over the other all the time.

    This is a unique situation.
     
  6. Ranger-AO

    Ranger-AO I'm here for the Taliban party. Moderator

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2004
    Messages:
    34,662
    Likes Received:
    150
    Location:
    the places in between
    Any claim you had on this girl is over now. She's a free woman. Suck it up and move along.
     
  7. Mordaine

    Mordaine New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2004
    Messages:
    16,928
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Jakarta, Indonesia
    my gf lied to me. I am younger but she started to talk to a good friend behind my back and go hanging out with him while telling me that she wasent.....
     
  8. walman7

    walman7 "Did you hurl in my shoe?"

    Joined:
    Feb 16, 2005
    Messages:
    85
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    hmm difficult situation. seems to me you just gotta find solace in teh fact that her and ur friend are happy and leave it at that. if she's not right for you thats the end of it and regardless of what she's doing, if she's happy and ur friend is happy in her company, thats an awesome situation. let her go and like u said ur all adults you'll just mature and learn from the experience. it'll also give u mad respect for the next chick that comes along and finds ur still hella cool with ur ex .:bigthumb:
     
  9. walman7

    walman7 "Did you hurl in my shoe?"

    Joined:
    Feb 16, 2005
    Messages:
    85
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    then again ur buddy should know, bro's b4 ho's bitch!:fawk: :fawk:
     
  10. Wolfden

    Wolfden :trance:

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2004
    Messages:
    2,072
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    MidWest
    I have to agree with Ranger_AO - she is free and you have to let it be - I agree it sucks, but are you going to ruin a great friendship with your friend or try to break them apart and loose them both?
     
  11. 2000GT

    2000GT Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2001
    Messages:
    5,773
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    Vancouver
    looks like the best solution is to be quiet :( dunno why this drives me nuts, but last night she went to the movies with one of her girlfriends and my 2 buddies, something just pisses me of with the situation. but I will do my best to not say a thing.
     
  12. diaper eater

    diaper eater OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2003
    Messages:
    17,211
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    mpls, minnesota
    im in the same situation man, my gf broke up with me, and now my two best friends are seemingly gettin closer with her, me n her arent really on speaking terms, things got bitter, but are getting better right now. and my best friend is always talkin to her online, and always has a quote of something she said in his profile, and my other friend is always texting her to see if she wants to hang out. i know i dont any claim on this, but honestly do my friends have to go in for the kill right away, or even at all, when they can have ANY chick, honestly they are both fuckin pimps, and this was my first love, and im still tryin to get her back. but shit man, as i heard in the song hoodrats by obie trice "you aint ownin on shit, aint no rings on that finger!" so we gotta just let it go, and move on
     
  13. kuno

    kuno .... OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2002
    Messages:
    5,235
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wichita, KS
    Your friend should have more respect for you than to get so close to her so soon after your break up. I agree.. Bro's before Hoe's..

    If your buddy came to you and told you straight up that he's started to get interested in her would you be OK with that?
     
  14. 2000GT

    2000GT Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2001
    Messages:
    5,773
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    Vancouver

    I think it started off as him doing me a favour and keeping her busy so she doesnt get upset when she thinks of me. Now they are just good friends.
    I would get upset if e came to me with interest in her, I wouldnt tell him to stop, they are there own people but I would have to pull myself out of the situation completely and not keep in touch with either of them.
     
  15. Grow up.

    If she wants to go out with him, why do you care? She's your ex, don't you want your friend to be happy? :ugh:
     
  16. Muricane

    Muricane Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2002
    Messages:
    43,230
    Likes Received:
    1
    Sure it's important to have a g/f that likes your friends, but it's not important to have your g/f being friends with your friends.

    When you broke up, they should no longer be friends (it's in the man handbook). You've made this situation by encouraging them to hang out.

    You made your bed, now you get to sleep in it. :)

    EDIT: It's not a unique situation. Just because you don't want to rules to apply to this situation, doesn't mean they don't.
     
  17. patboone7

    patboone7 I will BUST YOU!

    Joined:
    Feb 15, 2005
    Messages:
    2,981
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Indiana
    how long was the relationship with her? also if you dont mind me askin, why did you dump her? and last, im gonna assume your single currently or are you seein anyone new?
     
  18. IslanderOffRoad

    IslanderOffRoad Do you even lift kit? OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2003
    Messages:
    73,600
    Likes Received:
    249
    Location:
    Houston, Tx
    key letters here: EX

    Its not your business anymore man. You're jealous because you still feel something for her.
     
  19. patboone7

    patboone7 I will BUST YOU!

    Joined:
    Feb 15, 2005
    Messages:
    2,981
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Indiana
    well it's an ego thing, men have egos and they get hurt. once she was yours, you don't want anyone with her let alone your friends. my friends are cool with my girl and think of her as their friend, but would never cross that line and call her, im sure if they saw her out after a break up they would be cool with her, but not invite her over for a movie, to me these guys or this guy is not your friend, he is not respecting you by doing this, once you and her broke up, your friends stay with you man. don't wage a war against her, but do they really need her friendship that bad....?
     
  20. Dr3w321

    Dr3w321 Sgt. Pepper's Lonely

    Joined:
    Oct 7, 2003
    Messages:
    4,366
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    CT
    If there is anything going on, hell with your friend.

    Just learn from it.
     
  21. 2000GT

    2000GT Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2001
    Messages:
    5,773
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    Vancouver
    wow... not what I was expecting...

    I guess its the bed I made so to speak. I am not over my ex, and having my friends see her all the time, makes me bitter and upset. I ended things cause I could not see a future for us. We are very differant and are not able to maintain a peacefull relationship. It wasn't what either of us wanted, but it needed to happen, so I dropped the ball.
    I just dunno what to do, I guess I have to let her to my friends and start fresh? new friends, new life? Seems harsh to me, but I get the impression I can't do too much else unless I wanna feel like shit seeing her with my friends all the time.
     
  22. 2000GT

    2000GT Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2001
    Messages:
    5,773
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    Vancouver
    My friends wouldn't have a relationship with her, and she wouldnt with my friends. Its there friendships and the fact they have all play daily roles in one anothers lives.
     
  23. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2005
    Messages:
    20,480
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    much better than what i was trying to say :big grin:
     
  24. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2005
    Messages:
    20,480
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Houston, TX

    Haha, watch out, I see your friend(s) banging her. You need to pull the bros before hos card with your "friends" and if they dont back off then its time to find new friends.
     
  25. :ugh:

    If they are his friends and this is his ex, then why doesn't he just grow up and wish them well?

    Bros before hos is when a guy steals a girl from another guy. You can't claim something that isn't yours then dump your friends because they hit that shit.

    Some of you people need to grow up about 10 years. :hsugh:
     

Share This Page