SRS Being the Bigger Person [Very Long]

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by adelacruz, May 21, 2006.

  1. adelacruz

    adelacruz New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2005
    Messages:
    6,991
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Saint Petersburg, Florida.
    Oh God am i pissed off right now, I can't possibly see how i can be the bigger person and still feel good about myslef.

    Im only 17 and live at home, I have a little sister who I didn't grow up with and whose a little bitch. My parents and grandmother have inadvertedly put it in her head that she is equal to me and that she shouldnt have to worry about me hitting or correcting her (its the only thing she is afraid of, she will chew you out until you raise your hand to her then shes a little pussy), due to this she treats me like shit. We have been sharing a room for about 1 year and thank god are moving to a place where i can have my own room, but we always get into small arguments and today was a bad one.

    She has a problem with chronic lying, it makes her feel good to lie, my mom took her to a shrink but treatment was too expensive and they said it would take over 2 years. So it was a seemingly small matter but she was lying about me constantly throwing stuff on the floor and its the other way around, so it all just came together and I blew up and started yelling to leave me the fuck alone, and my grandmother got pissed off saying im older and have to act like it, etc.


    I know this is true, but I go on 2 or 3 month streaks of being the bigger person and it makes absolutely no difference, I dont know what to do. It's kinda weird but im feeling like crying out of rage which i think is kinda childish, I really dont know what to do. Especially with my parents telling me i have problems of suppressed rage against her, she definately isnt my favorite family member most of the time, but i still love her, and i never had a bigger role model so i try to treat her how i liked to be treated when i was her age but we grew up so differently that what i used to want at her age she doesnt give a shit about.

    I posted about her before, people basically wanted me to disown her, thats not what i want to do, I know i cant change her but i want to be able to deal with her bitch side but not feel like she's an ass when she behaves.

    I understand parts of this may be hard to understand because im pretty mad, if you need anything cleared up just let me know.

    btw: Im generally a good guy, everyone I meet that gets to know me thinks of me as that clean, decent guy. My friends know im a cool guy and ive never had any problems like this outside my home. Its so hard to know what to do, I know itll take a while to respond here but the offtopic forum is full of asshats who would recommend me some ointment for my hurt vagina or something.:o

    EDIT: posting this is already making me feel better, i can sorta see alot of stupidity in it, and I can poke some fun at myself for it, but i really need help, I dont even need to move out of home for college but if this keeps on I WILL move due to this situation. I mean i dont want to be the weird kid in his locked room 24/7
     
  2. FyreDaug

    FyreDaug lolswift

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2006
    Messages:
    23,228
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Canada
    Id say put that bitch in her place... your 17 and shes your little sister... hmm, so how little is she? How old is she? You need to have a good talk with her to tell her to get out of your fucking space, she came from no where and invaded your room and is now making your life hell, why should you have to go through that because shes being ungrateful?

    :EDIT:
    :mamoru: [/gimpy]
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,498
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    What you want to do is to be NOT where she is. She enjoys pestering you so if you show zero response it won't become fun for her anymore and she will keep to try angering you, so just move out. If she is upstairs you are downstairs and vice versa. Just don't be where she is.
     
  4. adelacruz

    adelacruz New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2005
    Messages:
    6,991
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Saint Petersburg, Florida.
    well its an apartment so for now i dont have much choice, but im pushing to move, and my grandma has finally decided to do it, were moving to florida where rent is cheaper to a beachfront home for like a grand a month where ill have my own room. Today I've noticed she hasnt done anything if i just put my headphones on that seems to work. Ignoring her really does help.
     
  5. SpeedLaci

    SpeedLaci New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2005
    Messages:
    73
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hey I can relate. I had to grow up with my brother and sister (Twins) ..they are 11.. and im 20.. Its a pain.. especially to see how spoiled they are etc.. but I have to go with Dark Eternal on this one. They do it for the attention! It likes they get on a power trip knowing that they are conquering the older one you know? Its a way to make them feel better about themselves.. but not responding..you are just putting her in her place..It will be hard for a while.. trust me.. it still is with my bro and sis.. but just dont aknowledge her antics and they will slowly cease. Also another hint of advice is siblings usually seem to behave better outside of the home. What I do is take them out.. like to get pizza or the movies or in public.. and they dont seem to misbehave as much..its weird i guess. but if you want to keep the connection with her, which it looks like you do.. try hanging out with her out of the home more.. if you feel she is going to get annoying or something like that ..take her out of her zone..take her somewhere where she is defensless..you know? When you guys are in the middle of a mall.. she has no family to back her up.. just you , her, and strangers.. and you are her best friend in that situation so she will be on your side? I know its long but i hope it made sense. Pretty much .. take her out of her comfort zone.into a situation where she needs you more then she doesnt.. you will see a change garunteed!
     
  6. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Pull your parents/grandparents aside and tell them how hard it is to always be the bigger person and how after months of putting up with her verbal abuse, you can and will lose it sometimes. Instead of letting this shit slide, they need to be more aggressive with putting their foot down on that bad behavior. When that bad behavior gets ignored, that person is basically getting rewarded for their behavior. That bad behavior must be PUNISHED and the good behavior must be REWARDED. Ignoring the problem makes it worse.

    I feel for you. I have a short temper with that crap and I probably would have beat her ass by now if I were you...
     
  7. RotiEatter

    RotiEatter New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2004
    Messages:
    131
    Likes Received:
    0
    Punch her, seriously. Thats what I did with my little brother to put him in his place.
     
  8. Arclight

    Arclight Hypercube

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2004
    Messages:
    19,688
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto
    Fixed by Chuck Norris.
     
  9. Hootahz314

    Hootahz314 I have daddy issues

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2005
    Messages:
    2,440
    Likes Received:
    0
    Well despite the overwhelming responses to hit her I have to disagree here. Maybe it helped as kids, but you're almost an adult and should know that hitting doesn't solve the problem. You really need your own room before you decide to do anything drastic or not. If you think she's a Bitch, there has to be a cause for her to act this way.. maybe looking towards the adults that ARE responsible for the way she is. If they won't do anything, take matters into your own hands but not through violence.. You never know if it will come back to haunt you one day.
     
  10. PukeyCute

    PukeyCute New Member

    Joined:
    May 5, 2006
    Messages:
    244
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Somewhere in NC
    This sort of shit pisses me off. The therapist was a lying son of a bitch, for one thing. Two years, my ass. The kid is doing it because it's the easiest way for her to feel powerful. All she has to do is make the choice to stop.

    Gonna have to parrot DiggityDogg for the rest of this. Until your parents and grandmother actually stop defending her with that "be the bigger person" shit, she won't have a reason to act like a human that was worth removing the condom for. If you're not exaggerating about how good you usually are about ignoring her and tolerating her psychotic outbursts, then there's no way they can't tell that it's simply not working. They're just turning a blind eye to it.

    However, I wouldn't smack her, simply because the brat's probably well aware that a call to Child Protective Services will land you in a very bad place. Maybe an alternative would be breaking or hiding one of her things in secret after every tantrum. :p
     
  11. an0nym0us

    an0nym0us New Member

    Joined:
    May 10, 2006
    Messages:
    56
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Texas
    well i see that you're 17 and probably about to graduate HS... do you plan on going off to college? i realized something after i moved off to go to school, i really do love my little brother, i mean a lot more than i ever thought when we were still living together. my brother and i never got along before i moved out, i mean we were at each other's throats to the point where we wouldn't acknowledge each other when we saw the other one in public. after i moved out, things got better... we talked on the phone from time to time and we would plan on going out together like on double dates and such. the point i'm trying to get to is absence makes the heart grow fonder. maybe a little bit of seperation will solve the problem. maybe something as little as being in a different room. for the time being, i'd just ignore her unless she's being pleasant or helpful.
     

Share This Page