SRS Asylum, tell me what you think.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by chucklenut, Apr 13, 2007.

  1. chucklenut

    chucklenut New Member

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    im 16, turning 17 this june. i recently quit hardcore drugs and plan on stayling clean for my entire life. im going to highschool currently and will go to college ASAP.

    i want to start looking to date girls, but with a more serious tone. granted, i've only ever dated 2 girls in my life and the last one was more like a "omg your a virgin too? lets fuck", juvenile kind of thing.

    any tips for an almost-17 year old dude, who doesn't have a car, that goes to school in a different city, that you could share? im very curious as to what people here who are older and obviously have way more experience me can tell me what to go for, and what to avoid.

    and since this is ot, heres a pic of me

    [​IMG]
     
  2. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    Well I'd say good work on quitting the drugs. My advice would be to stay strong on that front and work hard at school. Don't let girls and dating take over your entire life, at your age there are more important things to concentrate on imo.

    That's not to say don't have any fun (safely).
     
  3. Liquid_Vitamins

    Liquid_Vitamins New Member

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    You're only 17 and have dated 2 girls, my best advice would be not to set yourself up in mini-marriages. I don't mean you should screw around just that there's nothing wrong with dating a few different people who you find interesting. That's the whole point of dating. It's so weird that we commit so early and then by the time we're married we realize we've been married in a bunch of different ways for years.
     
  4. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Alice and Chains fucking rules.
     
  5. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    You are SUPER young, so the first thing I'm going to say is don't go looking for a serious relationship man. You are young, not a bad looking kid, and need to learn first what relationships are about. The best way to do this is casual dating. You need to have fun for a few years because serious relationships can cause a shitload of stress. Now I'm not saying turn DOWN a possible serious relationship; like if you meet a girl and really like her then of course, go on. But you are in this mindset only after dating 2 girls that you want something more serious....well most older people will tell you you should try your hardest to steer away from those and just have a blast all the way through college.

    Props on the quitting drugs too.
     
  6. chucklenut

    chucklenut New Member

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    Awesome advice, thanks guys.
     
  7. Scootin

    Scootin OT Supporter

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    Sorry, have to comment on the av :rofl:
     
  8. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Good for you to quit drugs man. Trust me, having been there it is not a road you want to go down. When I was 16 I quit messing around with drugs. I was never BAD with it, I only did a few for about a 9 month period, but I was emeshed in that scene because all of my friends were. One day I decided-like you-to get the fuck out of it. My life has been on a MUCH better road ever since.

    I don't talk to any of my old friends, but the last time I did was a couple of years ago. NONE of them are doing ANYTHING. We're all 26-32 years of age now (I'm 27) and of my old friends pretty much all of them are still in the drug scene, have done time, have way too many kids (who are subsequently growing up in a drug abusing family), living in trailors, and are barely scraping by. Not only that, but the crowds they hang out with are consistantly invovled in fights, theft, the drug trade, etc. It is an shithole of a lifestyle.

    Me on the other hand, I am 27, make $65k a year, have a nice house, a beautiful girl, and great friends who in turn keep out of trouble. At 16 I am thankful that I was smart enough to quit that scene and never look back. If I wasn't smart enough, I could be like those guys right now.
     
  9. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Oh, as far as women, your best bet would be to look into "The Mystery Method". Trust me, meeting women and getting their interest will never be easier.
     
  10. chucklenut

    chucklenut New Member

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    I appreciate your comments diggity.

    Explain this "mystery method" more please?
     
  11. chucklenut

    chucklenut New Member

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    :bowdown::bowdown: every song of theirs i can relate.
     
  12. SixSecrets

    SixSecrets New Member

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    You're a good looking guy and I applaud you for quitting drugs and so forth. It's good you have a plan (and don't forget to form a contingency plan). Be smart, sock away some money, focus on your studies/chosen career and guard your heart, Find joy in the day, and remember, even Atlas Shrugged.
     
  13. chucklenut

    chucklenut New Member

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    :bowdown: Thank you
     
  14. DarkAngel19

    DarkAngel19 New Member

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    Hey ChuckleNut, I didn't date that many guys in high school either, and I'm actually kind of glad I didn't. I had a blast every week, got great grades, took cool classes, went to parties (no drugs though:)) and played sports. I was so damn carefree in high school, you have no idea...

    I casually dated a little bit, and it was fun, but there weren't any strings to get all angsty about, no breakups to make my life miserable, and I did have sex so it wasn't lonely.

    If you find someone you really like, ask her out, borrow mom's car and take her to the movies. But don't spend actual time looking for a girlfriend, it happens when it happens.

    And don't wear plaid *grin*

    You have a great smile, use it to your advantage!

    And remember that there are some surefire ways to relapse with drugs and alcohol, and 'relationships' is one of them. Breaking up, divorce, moving and marriage are some big reasons for relapse:)

    Enjoy high school, college is okay, and after is the dreaded REAL WORLD...

    DA
     
  15. chucklenut

    chucklenut New Member

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    This thread is another reason why i love the people on this website. Thanks to everyone!
     
  16. GizmoR

    GizmoR New Member

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    first of all, you dont need girls to be happy. period

    Once you are trully happy with yourself, girls WILL come to you. Forget all this dating shit, enjoy yourself. Realize that at youre age, if you could find an amazing girl, she still probabably would want to experience other things at some point in life. Keep an open attitude and dont fall in the "OMG I really need a girlfriend to be happy" band club.
     
  17. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    The "Mystery Method" is one of many systems put out by PUA's (Pick Up Artists). While a lot of self righteous people immediately start dissing on this type of stuff, they do so in ignorance. While a lot of the stuff that PUA's and in particular "The Mystery Method" says does indeed focus on "scoring" but that's not what it's really all about-which is what a lot of self righteous people will try to say in an attempt to attack it.

    What this type of stuff really helps you with is increasing your understanding of how the dating game works, and it helps increase your Social Skills. While a lot of the information on there is delivered from the perspective of trying to get chicks like a player, it's not really about that. Why? Because ultimately it comes down to who you are. If you are a Nice Guy then that's what you are and nothing you learn with "The Mystery Method" will change that. What it will do for you is help you understand how best to present yourself in a manner of appearing most attractive. To do this you do not have to lie, you do not have to mislead, to be a jerk, or anything of the sort. For someone who is a Nice Guy but is having problems attracting women it is merely going to teach you where you usually go wrong and how you are sending the wrong signals to women which causes them to either friendzone you or completely blow you off.

    If you are out to score with as many girls as you can it also can help you there too because what you are learning is how to make yourself appear most attractive and increase your chances of success. I do not advocate that because I think you should respect everyone (unless they're disrespectful first). The primary things that "The Mystery Method" teaches is how to make yourself look attractive to women and it does so by breaking down how most interactions and meetings with women take place, what the usual response, mood, and attitude a girl will have. It will teach you how to read her feelings a lot easier which will help you understand what is actually going on. It will help you overcome the usual resistances and hesistations a girl will have when a random guy approaches (you) in hopes of taking her out. None of this changes who you are or what your goal is. If your goal is to find "the one" this will not change anything other than the likelihood of her seeing you as an attractive guy worth dating.

    It's hard to explain but you can learn a ton from it.
     
  18. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    I would not recommend "playing the field". Aim for serious relationships, making it clear you aren't planning on marriage until you have a stable economical situation underway. Dating is obviously something you are persuing so I can't really say stop and focus on other things like nailing the education quickly, but anyways...

    Date a lot before having sex, meaning don't mess around like that on the third date. Try to make it to a month, and you will see what she is in the relationship for.

    I cannot give you advise such as playing the field, the first thing that comes to mind is AIDS, but then again there are many other incurable infections that will pester you for life, even if you wear a condom. Short relationships are meaningless and form terrible aggregates on the subconcious level... real authentic relationships give you lots of experiance. You may go through a couple, and by that time you have an amazing handle on how to deal with the final wife, if it's not your first girl.

    At your age I recommend joining the gym, going every two days, eat clean as hell, look into amazing antioxidants (revertasol, etc). You will have very strong body and a very young biological age for good time to come.

    Most importantly, realise that becoming a real man has little to do with what experiances you've had, but how you have acted, up hear *head*, here *heart*, and down there *cock*.
     
  19. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    I disagree. There is a TON you can learn from short term relationships. ANY experience is experience. I'm not saying that one should run around and plan for one night stands, but casual dating is fine. You don't have to enter each and every experience with the opposite sex with a big commitment in mind. In fact, if you do you will often be setting unrealistic expectations on the budding relationship or adopting an attitude that can prove detrimental to your developement.

    Now, if a casual relationship has potential and you both want to take the next step, by all means do it. I just wouldn't enter every female encounter with "serious relationship" on your mind. Especially at your age most relationships are going to be very unstable. Things might seem perfect one minute and the next you're being ignored and/or dumped. Trying to be serious on every potential lead is going to set you up for a lot of dissapointment... and potential damage. If you go to the dating websites I visit you will see tons of guys who are constantly serious on every girl and they are always devastated and confused. You're too young to be getting that affected by girls. Your goal should be to work on school and your future, and the relationships should be for fun. Date to enjoy dating. Don't get so serious, not unless you're dating for awhile and you both decide you're ready for the next step.
     
  20. chucklenut

    chucklenut New Member

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    I truly appreciate all of the advice given here.
     
  21. Volmunikz

    Volmunikz New Member

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    all i want to say is wait for college and you might then otherwise :mamoru:
    you will mature alot more within the next 2-3 years... don't get into a relationship especially cause you don't really know yourself completely yet and the worst is getting "serious" with someone and not knowing exactly who you are and what you want.. it hurts them and you in the end.

    I say just take care of yourself.. have some fun, work, save some money, and go to school :bigthumb:
     

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