SRS As much as i want to get ahead I can't *SUPER RANT/VENT*

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by shadowoperative, Jan 28, 2010.

  1. shadowoperative

    shadowoperative Rawest asian alive, so raw they call me sashimi.

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    I have a circle of really great friend but my two best friends who have always been there for me but somehow they both end up pissing me off the most out of the circle because of the way they are. Let me tell you about them

    Guy 1 just had a kid and is now unemployed and squeezing out as much unemployment as he can. He constantly tells everyone how he is street smart and can make it in the world with out college. IMO Street smart is the cooler way to say im not kinda really smart smart. To me an education is everything. What pisses me off is that with the kid and unemployment he still goes out to movies eats out and buys nice things and doesn't like to spend money on other people which i understand but (me being selfish here) if i get stuck eating out with him and guy 2 which will be talked about later i end up paying when those two wanted to go out to eat. Anyways imo guy 1 should be looking for a job during the time shifts for watching the baby (him and his gf switch off) and saving as much money as he can. I mean I understand sometimes you gotta have fun but you have a life to take care of now, you know?

    Guy 2 My oldest friend the one whom i've hung out with the longest. Simply said he is a bum. Sometimes I can't stand it, he constantly does the "feel bad for me complaining" or the "subtle hungry whining" and also "im bored sighing". We both currently smoke for the longest time i've been trying to "quit" but I can't because I end up buying a pack and sharing it with him. If im going to buy a pack im going to have some too. I've told him countless times to go get a job anywhere you can fuck it go to McDonalds his response is "fuck that working at Mcdonalds is a fucking shit job look at all the losers..." I want to tell him so bad that right now that burger boy is making patties but at least he can somewhat support himself. But i don't have the heart to say it because he gets offended easily and pissy easily too I don't want to deal with it. Right now he lives with guy 1 and constantly complains about how he has nothing to eat cause he has no money, how he has no smokes, no money, how he has to sleep in a shitty sofa and hears a baby crying and has to deal with an old man and a couple who live upstairs. (btw guy 1 lives downstairs. guy 2 sleeps in the living room of guy 1's apt.) You know what the biggest bullshit is. His family is loaded and he was spoiled but his parents couldn't handle his attitude so they kicked him out but they'll let him back in as long as he gets a job. They'll give him everything they'll pay for his phone pay off his debt every fucking thing. He hates them though cause they don't respect him. As king of the world. Its understandable though right?

    Me
    I'm the Idiot who still loves these guys no matter how much they piss me off. I'm no better than them though. I'm 21, I work at a gas station as a deli guy making 8 bucks/hr 40hrs/wk, live with my mom in a pretty ok apartment, I'm fat no girlfriend (but currently I know i don't need more stress at this point of time in my life) and if I don't do something soon my future will be the same as theirs.


    I have dreams though just like them and anyone who else is reading this thread. Because you know what I want to live in a house with my mom with an awesome career. Instead I'm stuck in my own shit, and im sick of it. I'm sick of living in a shitty apartment, I'm sick of thinking about my asshole father who left us to live with his other family over seas, I'm sick of my mom coming home from work tired I don't want her working anymore cause a couple years ago she found out she had MS. I'm sick of customers who think its a bright idea to come in 5 mins to close and want to buy a sandwich off of my just clean slicer. I'm sick of friends who think I'm an asshole because id rather go to sleep early than stay up all night and play video games and go out to do shit and spend money cause they have nothing better to do the next day. And i'm sick of them not getting their priorities straight. I'm sick of feeling worthless.

    But you know what I'm fucking sick of the most.

    Life is how you make it to be and that even in the darkest times only you can turn that light on and make it brighter

    I know that I can change all of this in time but im too big a pussy to do so. I'm too scared to confront my friends. I believe that even if i get a degree from community college that it won't even matter. I fear that I'll be working the same shit for years to come. I want to help my mom but I know I can't.

    I don't remember where i was going with this but I tihnk what i was looking for was help.
     
  2. weezyfbaby

    weezyfbaby New Member

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    I don't know what to tell you other than you have to live your life, and stop wasting so much energy and time worrying about them.

    I had a friend who was kinda like your #2... The thing that gets me is the Walmart and McDonald's guys are "losers" but said friend isn't because he is unemployed, has to bum $ off friends, doesn't do shit because he has no $, etc so really, who is the true "loser" here?

    your #1 is kinda how I feel about my other friend. He quit work and was on unemployment for like two years straight. I don't know how, I don't care. but he would live it up, bars, sporting events, casino, etc. Part of me I guess was jealous but another part was "How the hell is this guy going to live like this when it comes crashing down?" Well, now he is living back at home with his parents and can barely do shit on the weekends. As for finding a job, I'm not sure if he is even looking but it has to be hard when you haven't worked anywhere for 2 straight years and you quit your last job because you found a way to get unemployment $ out of it and you just didn't feel like working.


    Anyways, I know this doesn't help your situation but it seems like you have the motiviation deep down to change your life. Why don't you do that? And stop being another mom/dad to your friends... You shouldn't be caring more about their lives than your own (no matter how much you love your buddies)
     
  3. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    You need to focus on yourself instead of things you can't control or change. If you want to get ahead, start from within instead.
     
  4. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    Fear is a prison with an open door, you are afraid of the hurt that lies beyond that door and therefore you are stuck in your comfortable cell, what you need is a hand that reaches out for you and pulls you out of that cell, if there is no reaching hand however, then there is no alternative to walk out of that door with your own strenght.

    From today you will start making logical decisions, you must do what 'is' logically correct , instead of doing what you want. Live a 'green line' of lifestyle, and staying out of the red. Meaning that you will leave your loser friends behind and start climbing up in society.

    You must understand that you don't always have the 'luxery' of doing what you want in life + doing what is correct.

    Sometimes you need to make HARD CHOICES, to bring yourself forward in life.

    In your case it means , leaving your mom, move to a city with a lot of job oppertunity, leaving your loser friends behind, and find a better job that suits with your education.

    Understand this: YOU are your mothers future, even if she falls you must not let your future fall together with it. Life lessons:

    -Helping someone is nice, but not at the cost of destroying yourself.
    -If people aren't contributing to your life, dump them.

    vs staying in a rut forever.

    What i mean to say is that 'if you are in a unhealthy situation' JUMP OUT of it.

    Swamp situations are terrible, you get stuck your life is on a halt, and all the wrong people drag you back into it, even worse you might be crazy enough to jump back or stay in it by yourself.

    NO

    The best thing to do is just to put your mind on zero, put your shoes on and leave, it is for the best. Later when you look back on it, you will be in disbelief of how you allowed the unhealthy situation to swallow you up.
     
  5. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    Obviously an education is not everything, or you would have left this guy in the dust years ago.

    1. How the hell is it Guy 2's fault that you're willing to buy him cigarettes and then bum some back from him?

    2. Tell him what you think. He needs to hear it. He obviously has an ego problem or he wouldn't be sleeping on a sofa while he waits for people to give him what he obviously deserves; telling him what you really think will make you feel better and it will let you find out whether he's really so delusional that he thinks he really is king of the world, or if he's just covering up a desperate need for sympathy which you so conveniently provide. If he doesn't write you off, he's just a sympathy case; if he does, then he really does think he's king of the world and you're better off without him around.
    So, following the "fat lonely guy" stereotype, you "love these guys no matter what" because they're willing to keep you company when nobody else will. Well, that's valid, but that doesn't mean you should willingly accept abuse from Guy 2. As for Guy 1...I think you're just upset that you're working and he isn't, but he's not homeless. Well, apparently he does have some street smarts if he's able to compensate that effectively for not having a job. Maybe you can learn something about charm from him; it goes a long way if you have any other qualifications at all.

    Your mom is not your girlfriend, and she shouldn't be a placeholder for one either. I'm sure she's a nice lady, but she's still your mom. Find a woman you can have an equal relationship with. Your mom can always move in with you when her MS gets worse, but she shouldn't be there right now and you shouldn't be wishing she were.

    Regarding the slicer: lock the doors 5 minutes before closing, and turn off the OPEN sign, then clean the slicer. Or if you can't do that without getting busted, stay a couple minutes after closing to clean the slicer, so you spare yourself the trouble of cleaning it twice. Pragmatism rules the world.

    All I can say about this is: be a man and take the leap. You can dream and worry and plan for something your entire life but you'll never do it until you fucking do it. You don't even have to know how to do it properly (unless you're going skydiving), because if you fuck up then the worst that happens is you have to start over, but at least you'll know what not to do next time. And if you get a degree and apply for jobs and you're still slicing ham in 5 years, at least you'll know it wasn't because you didn't even try. It's like they say: you never fail unless you try.

    (I might have bastardized that saying a bit. :fawk:)
     
  6. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    This is not just a figure of speech. Anyone who has ever bought a pet kitten knows what it's like to bring the carrier inside and pop the little door open, but the kitten just hunkers down inside and peers out the front with a look of terror on its little face. Humans have the same instincts that all animals have. Fear is literally a prison with an open door.
     
  7. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    Stop paying for other people's shit, both figuratively and literally.

    Let them know that you can't buy them food/smokes/whatever any more. Then stick to it.

    You can't change what they do or how they act. Like the others have said, focus on what you CAN change.
     
  8. shadowoperative

    shadowoperative Rawest asian alive, so raw they call me sashimi.

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    well guy 2 is mad at me cause last night i wanted to sleep but they wanted me to hang out. So they called and i said id be over and i fell asleep, so he talked to my mom and gave her attitude. So he came by my work and told me that i should call before I go to sleep and i was being a smartass and said that tonight ill be sleeping at 1130. He got mad and I think he kicked me out of his life. Win win for me.
     
  9. VA197

    VA197 New Member

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    OK, I'm not one to hold back on the honesty, and sometimes i get called a bitch or a cunt for it, but please understand I mean this in the most loving and caring way. I am going to talk to you now like I would if you were my son. I have a daughter almost nineteen, and if she were in your situation, this is the advice I would give her, straight up.

    Get away from these guys. They are leeches. They are doing nothing to bring you up in life, they are not encouraging you to better yourself in any way, they are wallowing in their own misery and not moving forward and if you keep hanging with them you will never get out of the black hole that you are presently living in.

    You have a job and a home. Your mother has MS and needs your assistance, and will need you to help her more and more as time goes on. I know this because I have an aunt with MS and I have seen what it does to a person. While you have the opportunity, go sign up for classes at your local community college. I don't care if it is one or two classes a semester, but start getting yourself an education. You obviously have a computer, so you probably can take some classes through the college online as well. Instead of wasting your time with useless video games, learn something that will give you some knowledge and get you ahead in life and will prepare you for a real job in the real world. Without an education, you are going to find yourself working shit jobs for the rest of your life, or manual labor until your body gives out.

    When you go to class, meet some quality people, with goals and dreams like you have. Look for people who are smart and going places to be friends with, not fuck ups who are wallowing in their own misery. Find some joy in your life, and learn to enjoy learning about new things. Pretty soon you'll find that those shitty customers who come in at the last minute don't matter so much to you any more, because you have much more important things on your mind.

    You have a life ahead of you. Leave those two losers in the dust. Sometimes you have to just cut people loose and move on. Maybe one day they will get their own lives together and you can reconnect, but until they do, concentrate on yourself and making a place for you in this world.

    Hold your head high and be proud of who you are. And mucho kudos on being a good son and taking care of your mother. Get a good education, then a good job, and she won't have to work and then you really can be proud of being the man she raised you to be!

    Good luck and God Bless!!!
     
  10. huskerfoos

    huskerfoos New Member

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    Don't complain about being behind when you can control that. You obviously chose to stay behind, then complain. My best friend is a bum, but I be damned if I give him a damn thing.
     

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