LGBT as a gay kid growing up in an accepting community...

Discussion in 'Lifestyle' started by urbanjanitor101, Nov 2, 2005.

  1. urbanjanitor101

    urbanjanitor101 OT Supporter

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    i feel very lucky to have to deal with very little prejudice. but, there are 2 stories that i have to share and get off my back. i've been out as being gay at my school since the end of last year, which was a time that was very scary for me. i had no idea what to expect. and i'm happy to be able to tell you that for the past 7 months i've been happier than ever.

    But, a few days ago (nat'l coming out day) i was sitting behind the booth that gave out pride/gay support stickers and i experienced my first act of prejudice. i gave a sticker to someone i considered to be a friend of mine. he, and another mutual friend took the sticker, crumpled it up, threw it on the floor, and spit on it. they walked away hysterically laughing. i sucked it up, showing no emotion, but i can tell you that that was one of the worst experiences of my life. i had never been as depressed as when i went home that day.

    The second problem im experiencing is that, since outing myself, i'm finding that who ever i become close friends with, they always get shit for being my friend. people call them gay because they're friends with me. its not that i have ever really cared what other people thought of me, but i am a very loyal person who is thankful for true friendship (probably because before i came out, i was always very reserved and never had many friends because i was afraid they would find out about the true me). now that i've developed several very close friendships (mostly with straight guys), some of them are getting made fun of for being friends with a gay person. it is annoying the hell out of me because he doesnt deserve this. i just had to get all this off my back. i really dont want to lose a friend because of other people being assholes, but at the same time it isnt fair of me to allow my friend to get harassed and have me not do anything about it.
     
  2. chriso59

    chriso59 New Member

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  3. sholnay

    sholnay New Member

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    I'm sorry.. its unfortunate that people are descriminated against by association, but thats our society. If this is grounds for ruining your friendship, then perhaps you are better off not being friends with them. But by the way you describe your friendship with these guys (very close), I dont think it will matter much. I mean, when it all comes down to it, who cares if some immature people call your friends gay? What matters is that they arent - and whats even more important is that they are not letting some bent out of line idealism shape their views and limit their friends. In the end - you and your friends will be closer and stronger.
     
  4. TommyBoiSxty9

    TommyBoiSxty9 here, but I'm really gone

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    When I worked @ cobalt in buffalo, it was owned by more str8 owners and we brought in Bartenders from the str8 community/bars...

    One of them was this guy named Ceasar --- This guy is just mr. macho italian as they get, muscley, macho guy, loves his chicks. I was always intimidated by him cuz he fit the type that would normally beat the shit out of a homo.

    First few tiems i worked with him though, we both got mad drunk, which of course lets guards down and i ended up talking to him and got to be really good friends with him over the time I worked there.

    He always used to pick on me because I barbacked (BAR-BACKED -- no E, shut it.) for him and he told me "ya know tommy boi, i've worked at bars for 6-7yrs, and you're the best barback I've ever had, you bust your ass, your funny and you don't take my shit... normally if any of my barbacks argued with me or gave me shit like you do i'd a knocked em out, but your just a bitch and I have to deal with that, you're the only guy I'd take that shit from.

    Long story short, long run, we basically called each other brothers, I went to the birthday party for his kid which meant a lot to him.

    I always knew he had my back too, especially when the striaght people used to come there and hang out becaues they kenw the owners or him... but again often times were the macho str8 guys.

    Few times they'd be standing there and make some stupid comment or joke and he would call them right out on it. He was far from gay and they knew it, but he respected me, he also told us how he came form a hugely catholic family and most of his family doesn't agree with it, but he really didn't see how it was a choice. Especially seeing how much shit we put up with firsthand when he worked with us and when we'd go out w/ them or soemthing...

    anyways, awesome guy, and no matter what his friends said it didnt matter, he knew what he was, and he was my friend.
     
  5. sholnay

    sholnay New Member

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    :wtc: brings a tear to my eye! :) but seriously, thats awesome
     
  6. The Internet

    The Internet New Member

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    as a straight guy who has been given shit for being friends with gay guys...

    you're probably being too hard on yourself. i doubt that they are taking it as hard as you are. :hs:
     
  7. TommyBoiSxty9

    TommyBoiSxty9 here, but I'm really gone

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    true, they probly jus take it as any other stupid joking, str8 guys love to bag on each other, if they dont choose one thing they'll pick something else :dunno:
     

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