SRS Are you a different person around different friends?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by driftwell, Jan 17, 2006.

  1. driftwell

    driftwell New Member

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    I've realized that I have different personalities around different friends.

    For instance, around 1 group of friends... I'm the outgoing, energetic, makes jokes at the right times kinda guy. I'm very bold and confident generally entertaining and very much apart of a "show"

    Around another... I'm the recluse, quiet, no matter what I say it's not funny, obviously NOT energetic guy that just happens to be in the background. I just feel like i have nothing to say and have nothing to add as entertainment at all. I feel like the audience, and not part of the show.

    Around another... I'm the one that gets picked on and i just seem the be the easiest target to make a joke. Don't get me wrong though, I take these antics quite well (for the most part) and sometimes have a comeback. Other times I just laugh too cuz sometimes they clown on me pretty good.

    It's kind of depressing when i'm either of the last 2... because there was a point when i was JUST the energetic, outgoing, part of the show guy. Some say it's just the group of friends... and perhaps they aren't real friends? Sometimes I think its just that natural competition thats in me and I just can't compete with their social aggressions and behaviour. Then I started thinking maybe I just don't fit in with particular styles of humor?

    I have gone through some life changine events in the past 2 years... perhaps I'm become a serious person?

    No matter what... I want to and am determined to get back to the person I used to be with everybody. Cuz now, I'm falling more towards the pathetic side and am afraid sooner or later... I'll be pathetic around all my friends
     
  2. Broken5hift

    Broken5hift New Member

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    i think thats with everyone. everyone has a niche in their click of friends. then your stuck in that position unless you do some sort of prison ritual and take out your clicks leader.

    you post made me think of my groups of friends and i couldnt help but laugh about you being right. in one group im the party animal, in the other group im the married boring guy.
     
  3. driftwell

    driftwell New Member

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    well its good to know i'm not some weird ... (i forget what you call someone with multiple personalities)

    The more i think it's just a "survival of the fittest" thing... i get depressed.

    I'm a small guy 5'3" and have always been small. I've been very insecure about it... and thought i got over it when i was 20 (because I was doing so well with a business i had going at the time).

    Now i'm going to the gym and trying to bulk out... in hopes to build up the self-esteem a little bit and go back to being the funny guy.

    THere HAS to be way to get out of "the position"... because I wasn't always like that.
     
  4. Broken5hift

    Broken5hift New Member

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    you sound like my friend ken. he is about your height and 25 i think. in my one group of friends he is the alpha male, he is the foreman for a body shop, had a well known band, had an awsome car he built, and built and worked on others cars, was the party animal, always loudest most outgoing and who everyone turned too and talked too. put him in my other group of friends and he was just the quiet short kid.

    but he didnt really know them as well as the first group. i think it boils down to who your comfortable with.
     
  5. Jay Pheezy

    Jay Pheezy New Member

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    I'm like that too. I like it when I'm relaxed and can say anything. I tihnk it's natural with most people I've talked to. People just shy up with certain people or get more outgoing. There's nothing wrong with you. Although sometimes I feel like I haven't "found" myself because how much I change around different people.
     
  6. driftwell

    driftwell New Member

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    DUDE... taht IS me haha.... except i'm still building nice crazy cars and i'm about to turn 23


    i think the reason why this bothers me so much... is how a girl would view me around the friends in which i'm not the alpha male.

    Lets face it... girls love the alpha male... and me being short... my social stature is all i've really got... BUT at the same time... my friends are really good people
     
  7. Broken5hift

    Broken5hift New Member

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    i hear ya. my friend felt the same way, like how was he gonna find a girl if he felt 5'3. eventually he became that 10 foot tall kid he was around us, around women, and now he has one. im 5'9 and my woman is 6'1. height means nothing when your personnality is a giant :rofl:
     
  8. KDazzle

    KDazzle New Member

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    can totally relate with you, bro. im short as well and im funny and entertaining as well with some friends, but drift into the background with others. you mentioned something about other ppl's "social aggressions and behaviour" and i agree with you. i feel like if im with ppl who are more aggresive than me then that's when i tend to fade. but if i'm with ppl who are a little bit more passive and not as socially aggressive, then i tend to become more outgoing. i guess the best thing to do is just find a group of ppl who are at about the same "social aggressive level" as you are.
     
  9. ebbnflo

    ebbnflo REAL- LAOT Hermit

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    Yeah, I think different people bring out different facets of my personality for sure. I am pretty sure that's:dunno: "normal".
     
  10. PuppyCat

    PuppyCat O.T. Mom

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    We all wear diffferent hats...I work in man's world and have to be tough (to the point of being bitchy---HA! but a man is called "assertive"). I am stoney around some friends, arrow straight with others...I do not think being short is really any part of the equation as to how one acts, or what hat they wear. Who we really are sometimes shines through...There will always be greater and lesser persons than ourselves. I am digressing again, however, the important thing is to know who you are and your limitations...wearing different hats is just an act anyway....to quote the great man Shakespeare "All the world is a stage".

    ~Climbing off my soapbox~
     
  11. driftwell

    driftwell New Member

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    i guess for those of use who don't like wearing "the hats" we wish we didn't wear... we need to figure out how to be "that 10 foot tall giant character"

    and man it really strikes home when you said "how can you get a girl if you FEEL 5'3"

    i know for a fact that when i'm feeling 10 feet tall that girls notice
     
  12. Gravity's Rainbow

    Gravity's Rainbow evian OT Supporter

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    jesus that is me right on the money. however i dislike position #2 the most.
     
  13. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    What matters is also if you are on the same 'frequency' with people, the individual characters all react onto eachother giving the 'athmosphere' that ya'll are in. This definitly means that some of the people are influencing you in a whole different way then in that other group. Stand above that and be who you want to be.
     
  14. driftwell

    driftwell New Member

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    darketernal... good analysis

    see the tough part is "standing above it", especially when i'm already been placed into a position.. I am determined however to get out of it... i didn't start off in that position... so i don't see why i can't get out of it right?

    I'm thinking maybe i need to take some time off from "those" group of friends? Maybe build up my "true" self and come back as a new person? I dunno
     
  15. Timdog

    Timdog New Member

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    I find I actually change the tone of my voice and the accent around different people. It scares me sometimes. I also change my laugh when I'm around different people. It's not fake either, I just naturally do it. Sometimes it gets annoying because I sound exactly like the person I'm talking to and they call me a copier. :rofl:

    EDIT: Except when around girls, then I usually use the same tone of voice for every single one.
     
  16. ebbnflo

    ebbnflo REAL- LAOT Hermit

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    :rofl:
    OMG, I'm sorry, but that is so adorable!
    Also I have a tendency to do kind of what you said sometimes. I am an actor/performer and pick up on people's accents too often. Especially Southern. I am from AZ and NON-Arizonans tend to claim that "natives" like myself have some kind of drawl or something anyway, so, If I am around drawl-y peeps, I will end up drawlin' too.
    Not fake for me either, I just do it. LOL I'm a bit of a mocking bird, I guess.
     
  17. cranberries06

    cranberries06 New Member

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    hmm...this is so interesting...there's really no right or wrong way to look at it. i think that every person has somewhat of a "core" self but i mean realistically..it's constantly changing and being modified to fit different scenes, etc. we are whoever we want to be whenever we want to be it. rhetoric, rhetoric, rhetoric.
     
  18. Timdog

    Timdog New Member

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    Actually, I've lately noticed I don't speak the same to girls anymore. Depends on who it is. :hsugh:
     

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