Applying incorrect logic caused me to focus on developing the wrong attributes

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Falconer, Jun 18, 2007.

  1. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I think I had been aware of this concept for a while but it finally sank in on Saturday night when I opened a set of ugly to average chicks and was blown out.

    My mistake was this:

    As a guy, I place a high value on how a woman looks. A chick can be hot and boring and she will still get attention/be opened/get laid. In fact, she can have any possible combination of attributes and as long as she is hot, she will be desired.

    So I assumed the reverse would be true, too. I assumed that if I could get my looks to or beyond a certain point, I would instantly have social value with women.

    I thought this despite seeing tons of "ugly guys" with hot chicks. I rationalized it as "they'd rather be with a guy who looks like me than a guy who looks like that guy that they're with." This was logical male thinking and I shouldn't have applied it to women.


    It's no secret that I'm not the most social person in the world. I came up with the fucked up concept that, if I was good looking and not really social, this would work to my favor because chicks would see me and wonder what the mystery was about me... why is that good-looking guy by himself instead of with a group of frat boys.

    Well obviously it doesn't work that way. I would love to see a gorgeous girl by herself, but the reverse does not apply. By isolating myself I was failing preselection criteria (ie. the chick thinks "that guy is by himself --> therefore there is something wrong with him or other people would be with him --> therefore I don't want to get to know him").

    Man... it's so the opposite with women, tho. A hot chick surrounded by a ton of guys turns me off. A hot chick by herself = attractive. But like I said, the reverse of this concept doesn't apply.

    I thought for a while that I could use my introvert tendencies to my advantage, but it doesn't work that way.

    btw, I'm kind of :rofl:'ing at this thread because on the looks scale, if I spend the time to make myself look good, I'm like a 7, tops. So I'm not even really good looking in the first place. lol.

    So there's no real point to this thread other than the fact that I'm agreeing with people who say looks don't really matter to a chick. Ever girl I've been with has loved my body, abs, etc., but the simple fact that hot chicks fuck ugly dudes proves that looks are not of high importance on the attraction scale.
     
  2. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    Chicks want the guy that the other chicks want, regardless of their (the woman's) looks.

    But many less desirable chicks are successful in landing men with good looks because these chicks actively pursue the man.

    As far as the situation where you got blown out, these chicks weren't interested in you, then when you approached them you did nothing to attract them, AND they assumed you are unable to get a good-looking woman, because if you could, why would you be talking to them?
     
  3. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    I've said it a bazillion times: your intellect is your own worst enemy.

    Why can't you just read DYD and DO what he says? If you do, I guarantee you will be successful.

    I tried selling cars once, quite unsuccessfully. One of my fellow salesman had been in the game for quite some time. This guy was not very intelligent.

    The sales manager once told me "He's not very smart, but in his case he uses it to his advantage. Whatever I tell him to do, he does. And because I know what works, he is successful because he doesn't try to go out on his own and do his own thing. If I tell him to go tell the customer to jump in the lake, he won't even think about it, he will just go do it."
     
  4. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I have DYD. I should read it again.

    I was in the ugly chick set for like 15 minutes. It was a 4 set with an UG4.5 and three 6.5s. I figured I gotta start somewhere. But that's not even the point of this thread. The point was me finally realizing something that should have been obvious.

    Exactly. If a hot chick opens me I assume it's because I'm awesome and not because she "can't get anyone else." But it doesn't work that way with chicks.
     
  5. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    Forget what the chicks rate on a scale of 1 - 10.

    Go for the chicks you are MOST ATTRACTED to.

    Out of the girls I work with, the one I am most attracted to is not the one I consider the hottest. Hell, there are plenty of better-looking girls there.

    Read DYD, then DO WHAT HE SAYS AND DON'T THINK ABOUT IT. JUST DO IT!
     
  6. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    again, you are applying logic in a way that flies in the face of logic. your sample size is too small and you are dealing with multiple variables, many of which you can't know anything about.

    have two guys hit on 100 girls each, each using the same open. if one is short and ugly and the other tall and handsome, THEN you can draw some conclusions. In the meantime you are using anti-logic to make the leap between one random experience and an unsubstntiated conclusion.

    Looks do matter. Height does matter. muscles do matter. Obviously not every girl likes the same thing, so 'logically' you should not be at all surprised when any particular girl or group doesn't dig you. eject asap to avoid wasting time and energy and move on to the next girl.
     
  7. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    ^ I didn't come to this conclusion based on this one experience... it was just that it sank in finally. But you're right about the small sample size.
     
  8. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I understand what you're saying but you have to realize that my brain does not not think. I can't turn it off. Acting without thinking about it is nearly impossible for me. I also assume this is why I don't have a short temper like most people do.

    That makes sense. I was thinking that more attractive chicks would be more difficult to talk to as they are more experienced and allow you to make fewer mistakes. Kind of like going up against a Brazilian Jiu-jitsu black belt vs. a white belt.
     
  9. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Why is it you seem to think you are an abnormaility when it comes to thinking? 90% of people overanalyze absolutly everything and try to logic what doesn't need logic. But a lot of that 90% is still able to ignore it for long enough to go out and just see what happens. You keep using it as an excuse like you are the only one that thinks constantly.... and we all think constantly, the only way to turn your brain off is with sleep or alcohol so quit making excuses.
     
  10. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    troof :rofl:
     
  11. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    the main difference is the hotter the woman, the less interest she is likely TO SHOW. (also, the more available she is, the less interest she is likely to show).

    so the hot woman isn't going to validate your ego nearly as much as a less physically attractive woman will
     
  12. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    be a man and go after what it is that you want
     
  13. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    just accept that this isnt supposed to be a game you win everytime.

    Think about a nut and a bolt. its not all about good nuts or bad bolts. Its about the right nut going with the right bolt. Think about poker. Even when you win, you always fold an lot of hands, lose some of the hands you play, and win the ones that matter.
     
    Last edited: Jun 18, 2007
  14. moses

    moses OMGWTFBBQ

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    Falconer, what amazes me about your posts is that I've seen your pics and you're an attractive guy, but Yail is right. You tend to over think everything it seems, and in my opinion its stopping you from being relaxed and enjoying the moment with these women that you're trying to talk to.

    Would you say that you're relaxed and having a good time, or focusing too much on routines and shit?
     
  15. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    The latter.

    Re: my pics: I could post a lot of pics that would make you go "omg, what a loser." I probably haven't presented myself in an accurate manner. Not like I photoshopped the pics or anything, but I become very conscious when my pic is being taken and I know how to position myself to present a better angle to the camera.
     
  16. moses

    moses OMGWTFBBQ

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    so stop focusing so much on entertaining, and just have fun with it?
     
  17. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    But if you had height and muscles you wouldn't need nearly as much confidence and could even fuck up the approach somewhat while still wearing the feedsack.

    Looks matter to men, no one wants the fat or ugly girls (in theory - but they all still get laid and married :mamoru:)

    Women will get with men that are skinny/short/unattractive if they have a lot of confidence/etc.... however, to think that looks don't matter is ignorant. The bigger your muscles are, the less personality you require during the pick up. Mind you if you are dumb as a brick with little to no confidence, then it won't really go past there even if you have giant 20" arms. But you will still have a shit ton of girls approaching you - before they realize that you lack in other desirable traits. So yes confidence is the main tool, and any guy can use it, but looks/height/muscles give an edge to those that have it.
     
  18. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    I agree.

    Looks are a foot-in-the-door, nothing else.

    The better you look, the more opportunities will present themselves, versus you having to go out and create the opportunities.

    An ugly guy will have to work harder, but an ugly guy with an awesome, confident personality will fare better in the long run than a good-looking guy who doesn't feel good about himself.
     
  19. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    and to make all this even worse, there is nothing wrong with Falconer's looks, yet he believes that there is!
     
  20. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    I think he gets off putting mental barricades up in his own head, because then he has reasons for why he isn't getting the results that he assumes he is entitled to naturally.
     
  21. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    always approach the girls you are attracted to. it is my belief that if you see something charming in a girl, she is somehow already far more compatible with you than the random hottie at the club. go after genuine attraction, not just looks.

    as to your thinking.. i'm a thinker. im a smart guy. i TOTALLY get where you're coming from with your long, drawn out, stream-of-consciousness posts.

    there's nothing wrong with that side of you, its you. However, and if you were my wing this would be an order from me. Match each hour of "alone" time working on yourself with an hour of "out in the field" time. If you spent 4 hours on PU forums last night, you shouldn't touch those forums again until you were out at a club for 4 hours actively doing "PU" stuff
     

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