SRS Anyone just sick of the grind?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Nev, Mar 10, 2010.

  1. Nev

    Nev OT Supporter

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    I'm now 25, have a degree from a good University, and a job that is meh, but at least I have a job. I have good family, good friends, etc but watching friends get married, have gets, get stuck in a rut that is just a rinse and repeat of so many others:

    Graduate high school, go to college, get a degree, take some crappy job, end up not liking your job/field, get married, move up in job/field that you don't like, having kids, get a few weeks off per year, retire....then, um..you can 'experience life'

    I just have a hard time fitting in with this. I know my example seems pretty extreme, but from what I have found, it's not far from the stereotypical common case. I really have a strong urge to just get up and travel as I feel that people are meant to explore rather be be cooped up in cubicles.

    Will I have tons of money? Well who knows what ideas I may stumble upon whilst traveling. But I will probably be relatively broke. But will have experiences you can't pay for.

    Anyone else hit with similar thoughts/outlooks? Or those who have just picked up and done something similar?
     
  2. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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  3. blackbirdbeatle

    blackbirdbeatle New Member

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    I've done everything you've said. From my work history (For the most part), to my ideas about family to extensive travel and life experiences. And I'm much less happy than my dad who has done half of the 'experiencing life' things that I have done with twice the years.

    What I'm getting at is that if you think forgoing kids and a spouse and all the trimmings for a life of more independent travel and adventure (And I hesitate to put it in quotes) will somehow allow you to figure out the modern condition, you're in for a rude awakening. Certainly with your happiness, it's not going to come from where you traveled or the position you held or not being tied down with kids. Unless you can figure out internally what makes you happy, you will always come back to that base level of happiness and discontent you had before you did all these amazing things.
     
  4. Nev

    Nev OT Supporter

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    Well I really really just want to travel. I've never been out of the country. I want to experience these things when I'm young rather than wait for my retirement to do them. I'm not saying I should completely neglect marriage and kids. I'd really like kids someday. I just think that so many people get on a direct path up through school and continue that path after school into marriage, etc because society has deemed it the correct path to take through life.

    Personally, I have no problem waiting until 30-35 to get married. I want to see the world while I'm young, not when I am 75. I may never make it there.
     
  5. Sick of the grind? Yes.

    Welcome to life though. You've got maybe another 60 or so years of it. May as well get used to it.
     
  6. Dio Seijuro

    Dio Seijuro New Member

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    If you are 25 and have never traveled, especially to a very different country for an extended period of time, then I think it might be worth it to put normal life plan on hold and travel a bit. But if you have already traveled much as a youth (because of your parents, or if you grew up outside of US like me, during college, military, etc.), it seems perfectly sensible that, if you make a decision to get a 9 to 5 life and family, and travel only sparingly in the next however many years, it's because you'd like to, not because you are just following protocol and have never seen the world and don't know better.

    It also depends on what "adventure" means to someone. Until a couple years after graduating college, I thought things like hitch hiking all over an exotic country with nary a penny in pocket were acceptable adventures so long as you get to see stuff. Now (I am 28 married no kids) I'd rather focus my travel on target places that have things to offer that I'll like, and hopefully sample the best examples of what it's most known for (hiring a personal guide might help, which sometimes cost $$), and I'd rather be able to lodge and move around at least comfortably and efficiently. Just because I enjoy watching tribe documentary on Travel Channel, does not mean I need to be there. The point I am trying to make is two folded: 1. adventuring without means can be too inefficient and might not give you what you want and 2. with a 9 to 5 lifestyle and a family, you can still adventure, if you put in effort in planning.
     
  7. blackbirdbeatle

    blackbirdbeatle New Member

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    Oh, then by all means do it. I thought that you were hinting that by forgoing the traditional routine of school-kids-working-retirement-death that you would somehow be happier or have more meaning to your life, when it doesn't work like that. But travel is well worth it and I think you might catch the bug like me. Just don't expect to find yourself like most of the other corny 20 somethings that gush after they've seen the Eiffel tower or the pyramids on a 4 week whirlwind tour.
     
  8. Dio Seijuro

    Dio Seijuro New Member

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    Another thought on the "grind". I think it would make a huge difference if I did not live and work in-town in a big city. I see all different kinds of people, have access to lots of shops and restaurants and bars after I get out of work, and I am that close to many international enclave/neighborhoods. It doesn't feel like I am isolated and stale and never "experience" things. If it's living in small town where there's nothing to do and no diversity, plus a long commute to work daily to an Office Space type of place, I would be pissed and would feel the "grind".
     
  9. Nev

    Nev OT Supporter

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    That's the exact mindset that so many take and I think its terrible.
     
  10. Nev

    Nev OT Supporter

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    When I leave, I want to continue traveling as long as possible. I don't mind living pretty cheaply, finding work, living with locals, etc. In fact, that's what I would rather do. Right now I'm looking at starting out somewhere like Costa Rica :o
     
  11. 4W4K3

    4W4K3 New Member

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    If you don't like your job, work toward getting a better one. I did for a few years, both during high-school and right afterward.

    If you don't want a cookie cutter life, don't have one.

    I'm not going to recommend not going to college, not listening to those older than you that "played it by the book", etc. All I know is I did not follow the typical path of life for people my age, certainly did not do what my friends did; and I am very satisfied with my life so far and the direction it is heading. Other people are not so lucky when they try to make their own path. I think it really just comes down to determination and persistence in reaching your goals.
     
  12. philvia

    philvia SUCKIN ON MY TITTIES LIKE YOU WANTIN ME CALLIN ME

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    get a better job and travel
     
  13. Nev

    Nev OT Supporter

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    excellent insight.
     
  14. quid

    quid I Piss Excellence OT Supporter

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    I've traveled a little, and I plan to travel more. But ultimately I think that just kicks my materialistic tendencies down a notch. When you get away from the plethora of nonsense that is Los Angeles and see people, even in this country, who live more simply with less emphasis on BMWs and more emphasis on living it changes your (my) opinion on happiness.

    I found triathlon and I love it, I had to wake up intensive care to find it.... But when you shift your mentality from STUFF to LIVING you will be happier.

    my 2 cents
     
  15. CodeX

    CodeX Guest

    What is with this infatuation with travel?

    I have traveled, I have been on 5 of the 7 continents, and you know what you will find? 90% of the places you will go will be shit compared to where you are, and 0% of them will have the family and friends that care about you.
     
  16. quid

    quid I Piss Excellence OT Supporter

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    thats why I believe in it... its a weird feeling to look around and see people on the other side of the planet and realize how different life there is. Made me appreciate things more.
     
  17. Nev

    Nev OT Supporter

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    I feel like most people have a natural instinct to want to travel and explore. :dunno:

    I have ever since I was a little kid
     
  18. BoomBoomBoy

    BoomBoomBoy Guest

    I pretty much felt the way you did for until my mid 30's, then I found out I like volunteering. I've volunteered for all kinds of organizations, and found some I liked and others I could do without. For the last few years I've been volunteering at the VA hospital, and absolutely enjoy helping out there.

    There's something very satisfying for me to be appreciated helping out people in need.
     
  19. Noel

    Noel New Member

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    This is like the 4th thread I've posted in about this exact same topic...its not an uncommon feeling.

    You are experiencing a Quarter Life Crisis: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quarter-life_crisis

    I and most of my friends went through the same phase following graduation. I had a great job but still wasn't happy...because a simple "job" can never give you a fulfilling life.

    What you have to do is discover what it is that makes you passionate...something that actually excites you enough to get up in the morning. Some people find it by pursuing work in creative fields, some people find it in altruism and helping others, some people find it in building their own business.

    Travel/Backpacking is one of the most common ways to do this and comes highly recommended. Wandering around exotic foreign places, experiencing a different way of life, meeting new people and learning about different life perspectives....these types of adventures go a long way in putting your own life and direction into perspective.
     
  20. Noel

    Noel New Member

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    Was it typically touristy stuff or work related?

    Or did you actually immerse yourself in the culture, get to know the locals, their customs and really absorb it all in?

    The infatuation with travel is that you get to experience an entirely different (and thus exciting) culture. Some parts you'll love, some parts you'll hate...all of it really puts your own home life in perspective
     
  21. Zero

    Zero Well-Known Member

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    what do you do for a living that is so mind numbingly terrible?
     
  22. blackbirdbeatle

    blackbirdbeatle New Member

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    I don't know a single person that has found the meaning to their life or their calling by traveling long term or not. I'm sure it happens but it's not like you are going to start negotiating with border guards in Georgia, drinking tea with locals in Cairo, or snorkeling in the Red Sea and then all of a sudden find your way.
     
  23. NUDES

    NUDES New Member

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    Coming to accept I want nothing to do with having children has greatly improved my perspective on life in regards to this topic.
     
  24. SofaKingKong

    SofaKingKong New Member

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    When I was single and had no real responsibilities, sleeping till noon and going out all the time was normal. Now that I have very little free time, I enjoy sleeping in and going to the bar alot more now.
     
  25. brocephus

    brocephus i would unplug cooly's life support to charge my c

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    :werd:

    Without the grind, we wouldn't live in a country where we do have the luxuries we do.
     

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