Anyone here think they are afraid of commitment?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by wake_o, May 24, 2008.

  1. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    Im starting to think its my relationships life's fatal flaw. Im starting to think its why i have ended my only truly seriously relationship, even though i definatly didnt think so at the time. Anyone else feel like they might just be afraid of commitment?
     
  2. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    I don't believe in commitment. It makes no sense.
     
  3. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    well the majority of animals do it so its kinda hard wired in us
     
  4. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    I'm pretty sure I'm a commit-a-phob, or, at least, that's the conclusion I've come to in the last year or so.
     
  5. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    Nope, i've never found myself really 'afraid' of anything I have control over.
     
  6. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    Thats just not true buddy.
     
  7. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    most primates and 90% of birds are, and nothin else matters:eek3:


    but i meant humans are predisposed to be monogamist
     
  8. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    Cite your sources, I don't know much about birds but you're mistaken on the primate front.

    Edit: bonobos are my fav primate, and they're polyamorous
     
    Last edited: May 24, 2008
  9. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    only because i'm moving at the end of the year. if you were in a serious relationship though, that's a commitment to me. maybe you just didn't like it is all.
     
  10. Monotone

    Monotone New Member

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    I like commitments.
     
  11. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    Totally. Its not just relationships for me though... I like to do what I want, when I want.
     
  12. alo816

    alo816 New Member

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    I'm going into my 3rd year of college...commitments are just not for me. I was in a relationship for 3 years into my first year of college. Now I have wayyy to much fun meeting new girls, hooking up with them, and partying. I would rather not have to worry about someone else.
     
  13. 04JETTA

    04JETTA OT Supporter

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    i just havent met the right one yet im looking but im not gonna freak out wondering every second where they are/when they are coming im not afraid of commitment just havent had the oppurtunity yet
     
  14. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    yeah i was kidamakin stuff up about primates, i cede that point to you lol. As an interesting fact tho, 90% of bird species really are monogamous...

    "Monogamy is one of several mating systems observed in animals. The amount of social monogamy in animals varies across taxa, with over 90 percent of birds engaging in social monogamy but only 7 percent of mammals engaging in social monogamy"


    from wiki
     
  15. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    i am in the exact same situation as you. The girl i dated ih HS/ first year of school was a LD thing. I really cared for her, still do, but it just didn work out, i wanted to much to live the single college deal. haha funny though, im also going into my 3d year ad everything
     
  16. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    werd. This is one of the reasons I love my life so much right now, I have control over just about everything.
     
  17. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    can i asked what made you end the long relationshp, and how it is with her now? friends?

    Im also a big hipocrite, Im stil friends with the girl and hate when i hear about her and guys, yet i'll hook up with a dif girl every weekend/ sort of dating a girl. i think im just really immature all around, cause i still really care for the girl, but see it a a mute point since there is no way we'll live within 4 hours of eachother for the next 8 years.
     
  18. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    i kind of love my life for that same reason, as im in the prime of my life and can do almost anything i want. I am not completely in control tho, as im stuck in school for 5 more years at a school i absolutly love, but a location that i dont love quite so much
     
  19. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    I'm special.
     
  20. Diesel66

    Diesel66 My standards for women is like rent-a-centers stan OT Supporter

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    not exactly. They just use sex to dispell any issues. Get mad at someone ? have sex to make up.


    It would be interesting, someone cuts you off in traffic. Both pull over and he/she gives you oral to say sorry. :mamoru:
     
  21. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    And for relaxation :eek3:
     
  22. yankeeschick14

    yankeeschick14 New Member

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    see, I think this is just because you're actually afraid of commitment and/or getting hurt
     
  23. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    No, not if you're with the right person.

    If you're settling, or your SO has red flags yet you continue to stay with them, then obviously someone would be afraid of commitment because they would always be thinking "what if there's someone better out there for me?"

    But if you're with someone meeting all your needs, then there is no better possible match for you (maybe equal, but not better, or if better, not statistically significantly better, like you upgrade from a 9.5 to a 9.6, big deal), so there's no reason to be afraid of commitment.

    Yet another reason why it's good to have a long list of specifics you want in an SO.

    The only thing that could go wrong then would be either:

    a) you change (and therefore your need change)
    or
    b) your SO changes and no longer fulfills your needs.

    So fear of commitment would really be fearing one of those two scenarios.
     
  24. wake_o

    wake_o New Member

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    I understand this sentiment. i used to think that people never change, but boy was i wrong. Maybe part of my issue is that i cant deal with believing that people change/ getting over the fact that the old them is gone
     
  25. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    No I'm not afraid of commitment, it's a very relative thing anyway, being committed to someone or something or a task, is very beautiful, that does not mean however that you are somehow stuck or imprisoned.
     

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