Anyone eventually end up going out with a long time friend?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by wallydog11, Jul 4, 2006.

  1. wallydog11

    wallydog11 New Member

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    I've had a good friend who I was close friends with in highschool, we're now in 3rd year college and now that we're home in the summer, we've been hanging out more frequently. We're both single now, i'm not sure if she's interested in taking it further or if she's still in the friends stage...i'm not sure she if likes me as a friend or wants to move further but is to shy to make a move...this weekend she seemed closer than usual when we went camping (teasing, sleeping on shoulder etc). And today she asked me to come visit her at work on her break....it would easy to say she likes me if we weren't such close friends, but i'm confused if she's into me or just comfortable since we've known eachother for so long now..any ideas? anything i should do?
     
  2. WeRdToYoMoThA

    WeRdToYoMoThA Girlies on Standby, Waiting to say Hi

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    minus well try :dunno:

    i did it, but i did it after not talking to said girl for a few months
     
  3. Tiberium

    Tiberium Active Member

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    My advice is to hurry the fuck up and make a move... otherwise you're screwed. Trust me, I know. :hs:
     
  4. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

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    :rofl::rofl::rofl: You people crack me up sometimes....

    That's "Might as well try," smart one! :hsugh:
     
  5. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    :hsugh:
     
  6. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    i'm betting she's interested (more than friends)
     
  7. wallydog11

    wallydog11 New Member

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    yeah i'd think so..

    the thing is, she's been my "crush" best girl-friend since highschool...i've liked her since then but i've nevered actually tried asking her out or whatever...I regret it since then but im hoping now something can happen:x:
     
  8. wallydog11

    wallydog11 New Member

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    also how can i try and take it a little furter or ask her on a date...i don't want to scare/push her away if she isn't interested in me that way.
     
  9. moomoo3210

    moomoo3210 Active Member

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    don't want to be negative or anything, but sounds like your friendzoned.. just spill your guts out n tell her everything or live life regretting what *could* have been if u asked her out
     
  10. whunpac

    whunpac New Member

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    sounds like she definately has feelings for you, but is afraid to ruin what is already a beautiful relationship.
    the question is, are you willing to risk losing her as a friend to take it to the next level? do you think she might be 'the one'? if so go for it, if not cherish what you have and leave it at that.
     
  11. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    Look, theres really three ways it can go.

    - It all works out.
    - It works for a while but then shit happens, you may or may not go back to being friends.
    - She doesn't like you that way, you get hurt, things are weird for a while but more than likely go back to how they were.

    Make the move, if she is a worthwhile friend it won't ruin your friendship whatever the outcome.
     
  12. beautiful disaster

    beautiful disaster OT Supporter

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    i dated this guy who i was best friends with all through middle/high school. we dated seriously for little under a year before he was killed in a car accident a couple years ago...

    for some people it might not always work though lol
     
  13. giapia

    giapia Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you re

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    i was friends with my last bf for 2 years before we got together. ended up staying together for about 3 yrs and it was a really fulfilling relationship
     
  14. matsuya

    matsuya Active Member

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    watch the season 2 finale of the office.
     
  15. i2ichal2d

    i2ichal2d New Member

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    id say make an obvious move already b4 u do get friendzoned. no harm no foul neways. hit or miss
     
  16. RedDawg

    RedDawg Well-Known Member

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    i was best friends with my current g/f for about 1.5-2yrs. before we became a couple and its the best relationship i've ever had.
     
  17. bokhan

    bokhan i love you

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  18. niquesuave06

    niquesuave06 New Member

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    I was best friends with my gf for a few months before we started dating and now we've been together for almost 16 months. Getting things started was horribly difficult, but we had added complications to our relationship :noes: It was kind of scandalous. But being friends before has definately helped us get through some things that I think we may not have gotten through otherwise.

    And it sure made it easier for my gf to be my best friend too :love:
     
  19. Fiya

    Fiya Guest

    :hs: well said
     
  20. jackjohnson

    jackjohnson simple as something nobody knows OT Supporter

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    spilling your guts is the worst advice for these types of situations. OTers always say to do this in this type of situation. It only works in movies, in real life its just plain creepy. you're friends with her for a long time and then bam one day you confess all kinds of crazy shit to her. talk about being thrown under a bus it's just not romantic at all. put yourself in her situation, its just too weird, too high risk, and no matter what it'll never be the same. edit: its basically the equivalent of one of your best buddies of a few years coming out of the closet and confessing his love to you. in a lot of cases thats the type of friend you are seen as to her

    you have to somewhat pursue it. you got to make her want it. all the usual mind games. don't always be there. don't be so damn easy. flirt. keep progressing the physical contact . basically you have to make her think "what if?" This gives you an out as well because if she's not interested you can still be friends.
     
  21. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    I've never dated a long time friend but my GF said she has.....She said she dated this guy she knew for a long time for a lil bit but then they soon realized they couldn't be a couple because they were too much alike and would just end up killing each other so now they are just friends.
     
  22. armond

    armond New Member

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    Dating my best friend right now, in fact we live together and have all talks of marriage coming out.

    How it started:

    1. Friends with her since 9th grade, over 10 years now
    2. Started hanging out more frequently
    3. Became "closer" meaning we began to have a little more physical contact
    4. I explained how I felt about her, and how I want to take a chance
    5. She weighed her chances, telling herself "he is my best friend, I come to him for everything, why not?!"
    6. Present, we are still together, been about 7 months now, we both agree that we will more than likely end up dying together

    Give it a chance, be persistent, but not in a creepy way.
     
  23. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    i was friend zoned with this girl i liked and had been friends with her for at least 8 months. she called me her best friend. i got pissed becausei really liked her and she flirted with me every chance she got and i did back with her, but she never wanted anything more than friends even though i tried to make smooth moves on her. so i said well, if she just wants to be my friend or my best friend and i really like her, instead of it driving me crazy every day, i decided to ignore her out of the blue. didnt pick up her phone calls or text messages. NONE of them. fast forward to 2 weeks later of ignoring. i see her at the same party im at, mutual friend of ours. she sees me and gets an "oh shit" look on her face and moves away when I walk in. then she comes up to me an hour later at the party and is like, can i talk to you?

    i told her yes, in a minute, im busy right this second, and she runs off and starts crying. she comes back like 10 minutes later and is like "please abomb, can i talk to you?" so i said ok, lets go out front and talk. we are talking and shes like why the hell did you just ignore me, and i said if i cant get what i want, then i dont want to torture myself.. and she says abomb i dont care, i just want you in my life....... and now shes my girlfriend and we are really happy at the moment. later, she called me a smooth manipulator in an admiring way though, i found that amusing.

    cliffs: got out of friend zone, damn im good.
     
  24. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    My take on it...

    Don't "spill your guts" or "tell her how I feel about her." Instead, flirt with her. Joke, play, make her attracted to you. Invite her to go do something fun, and - shit, how to explain this (I personally believe that it's VERY hard to go from long time friends to lovers), make your intentions KNOWN but NOT by saying it. Do it with actions, not words.

    Make her attracted to you by being a great man, a great flirt, a great time when you are together. Nothing serious, all flirting, all joking, all being who you really are, you know?

    This is one of those topics that should have a book dedicated to it.
     
  25. wallydog11

    wallydog11 New Member

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    the thing is...she KNOWS i like her...she flirts with me too but I don't know if she's just being friendly or what...for the last 10 days we've spent everyday together, and we call eachother all the time, we've never been this close because one of us always had a bf/gf. I know she has a great time with me, i've never seen her laugh or be so happy with anyone else, we get along great and connect on everything. The stuff she does is what confuses me..example, she'll rest her head on me, she sits beside me every chance she can, asks me to come visit her at lunch break,she gets me to put my arm around her when we're in cabs. I don't think we can get any closer without being intimate.

    the situation is confusing, when I thought i had a chance back near xmas, she said she didn't want a relationship then...but she told her bestfriend that she could see us dating in the future....:x:..although right now one of her "ex's" just (nothing serious happened) stepped in the picture:fawk:
     

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