Another question I think I already know the answer to, but...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by PSUPef2K, Jan 17, 2005.

  1. PSUPef2K

    PSUPef2K #Elite member

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    Ok, so i've been seeing this girl for almost 3 months now, we've gotten really close, she said "I love you" tonight.

    Happiest night of my life. For those of you that think you've been in love, so did i, until i met her and feel what i feel for her.

    However, when sexual past has come up in conversation, I told her I had only been w/ one girl.

    Fact is, i've been with 2. I hooked up with another girl 1 time before i even met my current g/f. It's been bothering me that i haven't really told her that, but I was too ashamed to tell her at the time in fear she would judge me for having sex outside a relationship. It's also something i'm not personally proud of.

    Point is, I feel now that things are progressing more, that I owe it to her to tell her of this other girl I was with. Especially considering if she comes w/ me to visit my one friend we'll probably run into her, and I don't want her hearing about this other girl i was with when I told her i had only been with 1 other.

    Should I tell her? I believe in being 100% honest, i just wasnt at this point because i was thinking she'd judge me. I don't think it is that big a deal, I just fear she will think im not trust worthy and it will mess everything up. I really want to spend the rest of my life with her, and she makes any love i've ever felt seem like nothing.

    Thoughts?

    Thanks in advance.
     
  2. trust

    trust Guest

    well me and my girl have talked about the same subject so i feel for you. I would tell her, and always be honest to her. If you've lied to her once you wont feel bad about lying to her again. Personally i havent lied to my girlfriend once about anything. So far, i have found that honesty is the key to a good relationship. You should be able to tell your partner anything and vise versa. Id suggest talking. Good Luck, Honesty > *
     
  3. Myst

    Myst New Member

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    Truthfully you owe her no explanation. Your sexual history is your business, if you're STD free & all that. Realize it works the other way around as well.
     
  4. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    I would not tell her. It does not matter. How many has she had?
     
  5. PSUPef2K

    PSUPef2K #Elite member

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    more then me, come to think of it, i never got a specific number.
     
  6. Sionell89

    Sionell89 I grew up when I wasn't looking

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    If it will make you feel better, then you should. And simply tell her that you were ashamed of it, you didn't know how to bring it up, but you didn't like feeling that you were keeping something from her in spite of the fact that your sexual history is your own.

    Methinks you'll get points for it. :bigthumb:
     
  7. Muricane

    Muricane Active Member

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    :rofl:


    Your first mistake was getting into that conversation. Don't bother telling her. Also, why would she hear about this other girl if she meets her? Is it common practice for your friends to point out all the people you've slept with as they walk by?
     
  8. mkevaldz

    mkevaldz New Member

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    past is past, only a memory. as long as you're clean, she's clean, and you two are the only ones either of you are fucking, none of it matters. I'd only been with 3 women when I got with my current so, she'd been with quite a few more, I never asked, she told, but I was ok with it. I used to get worked up over that shit, but I learned my lesson the hard way.

    she loves you, if you feel it's that much of a burden, tell her, look and sound ashamed when you do it, cry and make it sound like you feel yourself to be a horrible person just for keeping that one detail from her, she should comfort you and say it's ok...if she really loves you.

    good luck mr. a+
     
  9. PSUPef2K

    PSUPef2K #Elite member

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    I told her...she wasn't mad at all. Not sure if it got me points, but that is irrelevant.

    Last night she told me she loved me...I couldn't be happier then I am right now. She's the first girl since my first g/f in 10th grade, if that even counts, to tell me she loves me before i told her...I'm on cloud 11ty billion :wiggle:

    After telling her what i had to say I felt a little wierd, like i really didn't have to say it. She even told me I didn't have to, and that she's made a mistake she regrets as well, but basically is just happy she is clean and I am clean.

    I feel better though, having gotten it off my chest. The way this girl makes me feel though is unreal. I'm just happy to have her in my life. :love:
     
  10. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    Excellent. She seems to be very understaning and down to earth. Those girls are rare. Keep her or else. :)
     
  11. Dr. Kenneth Noisewater

    Dr. Kenneth Noisewater New Member

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    :werd:
     
  12. PSUPef2K

    PSUPef2K #Elite member

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    maybe so, but i needed to get it off my chest or it would have bothered me down the road. Now EVERYTHING is out in the open and i am hiding nothing.
     
  13. PSUPef2K

    PSUPef2K #Elite member

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    that's pretty much how it went. i didn't cry or anything, but i was and am ashamed. She said it was ok and wasn't mad at all.

    :)
     
  14. bobbarker70

    bobbarker70 New Member

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    unless she asks, dont tell
     
  15. calilynne

    calilynne New Member

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    It should not matter. Anything that happened before her is out of her control. The question I would ask to you is, why did you feel afraid to tell her about #2? I could understand being hesitant to tell her about #200, but 2? Perhaps if you're telling each other you love one another but still are unable to talk openly and freely about everything, you may want to take it slower. Work on those parts of your relationship so that you do not have to come to the point of lying to each other or regretting not telling everything.

    If she loves you, it shouldnt matter how many people you have had anyway. And if you are that close, you should be able to tell her that you were'nt comfortable telling her everything yet, but feel you wish to now. She should understand. If she does not, then your problems are deeper than this.
     
  16. PSUPef2K

    PSUPef2K #Elite member

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    she did understand, and I did tell her i wasn't comfortable telling her about #2 because of the circumstances and it was a 1 night stand. I was afraid she wouldnt think i was a good person. No worries. All is well. The update is posted above :)
     

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