SRS Another issue with my parents and the military

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Casino, Jun 17, 2009.

  1. Casino

    Casino OT Supporter

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    Just for a little background info, I'm 19 and in Army ROTC trying to contract because I want to serve after college. My parents are 100% against it, saying it will kill the family, they cannot believe I'm related to them, don't want to know when I'm killed, take it as a death sentence, etc.

    I told them I'm contracting despite how they feel and they are very upset about it. I have to get a medical waiver before I can contract and the only thing I need for that waiver is a doctors note. My parents took me to the doc for the condition the Army found just for my own personal health. My parents are happy that the doctor said my condition will not affect me at all, but then I asked the doc in front of my parents for a note so I could join the Army. He said he could and all I have to do is email him the address to send it to and obviously my parents do not want the note sent.

    Here is where I need advice on. I want the note sent so I can contract but my parents are completely against it. We've sat down and discussed the whole situation many times and I will not budge on my stance and either will they. I'm never going to have their approval on this so should I just go ahead and email the doc behind their back and have him send it? I understand why my parents are upset about me joining and I'm sorry for what I'm putting them through because I love them, but this is something I have to do.

    Please do not move this to Teh Barracks, I want advice from you all. Thanks!
     
  2. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    You're not doing anything behind their back. They already know where you stand and that you plan on doing it. You said it right there in the office in front of them and the doctor.

    Do what you need to do.
     
  3. gkremian

    gkremian New Member

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    Contract. It's what you want to do and nothing should stop you from doing that, not even your parents. My father enlisted into the Army in 66 or 67, even with both of his parents (including his father who was on Iwo Jima) telling him not to do it. He basically went through the same thing you did. After switching from Army to USMC, he went career and spent 23 years in the Corps. He will tell anyone it's probably the best thing he's ever done and he still calls those years the "wonder years."

    Best wishes.
     
  4. G_Ranger

    G_Ranger New Member

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    I agree with whats been stated already. Do what you feel is the right thing to do. Legally they have no ability to stop you from having the doctor send the letter...the fact that they are aware is completely your call. You being over 18 means they no longer have a right to be involved in your personal medical business. Most of the time people look past that and allow parents full access...but legally they need permission.

    At the end of your life you will look back on this and either wish you had listened to your parents or be glad you didnt. Either way thats what life is all about. A wise man once said that the interesting thing about being an adult is when it starts. Really being an adult starts 12 moves before you or anyone else in your life realizes it does...thats what makes you the adult you will become. Good luck with your decision and i look forward to serving with you if thats the path you shall choose!
     
  5. Casino

    Casino OT Supporter

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    I'm going to go ahead and have the letter be sent. I know in a couple weeks they are going to mention it and I'm going to say I already had the letter sent. They are going to blow up saying I did it behind their back without telling them first, etc. Dammit whatever it will be worth it in the end.
     
  6. tubachris85x

    tubachris85x New Member

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    I totally respect that they care about you, but at the same time, I feel that your parents being against what you want to do, and the military, to be quite ignorant.

    Perhaps their minds will change over time, but they need to at least be supportive of what you want to do.
     
  7. Casino

    Casino OT Supporter

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    I can't see them ever being supportive of this, especially how they think I'm the most evil son ever for putting them through this. I'm so proud of the Army, but whenever I mention the "A" word, it causes a fight. Who knows, maybe they will come around.
     
  8. seismic

    seismic New Member

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    There's nothing more respectable than someone who serves for our country, IMO. Good luck!!
     
  9. EYOB

    EYOB Guest

    Didn't read the thread, but make sure you or your parents don't start blabbering about medical issues to the military. If it's something MEPS can detect on your body deal with it, but if it's paperwork, hide it. :dunno:

    I've taken ADHD & anti-depression/anxiety meds, but I didn't tell them about it. Another guy I went with to MEPS did tell them about his similar situation and got DQed.
     
  10. Casino

    Casino OT Supporter

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    I'm dealing with DoDMERB since it's ROTC. I'm not worried about my parents trying to sabotage it, but I can't rule it out completely. I'm just taking it one step at a time and the first one is getting this note sent away. They do a good job at making me feel guilty though.
     
  11. OniMinion

    OniMinion ...recalls when this forum was actually about cars OT Supporter

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    Enlisted or Officer? Please say officer!
     
  12. disley

    disley Ooooh no it isn't. Ooooh yes it is. OT Supporter

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    Personally I agree with your parents because I don't believe you can fight terrorism with the military, and we've lost enough good men.
    But it's your life and your choice, they must accept that, so go for it, they'll still love you after they get used to the idea. You're a man now, and you must make the decisions for things you feel are important to you.
     
  13. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    i HONESTLY feel bad for you that your parents are very selfish and can not support their son going into a good and proud career.. that is some weak shit.
     
  14. Casino

    Casino OT Supporter

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    Letter was sent.
     
  15. Julius

    Julius Guest

    Good, that's how it should be.
     
  16. Julius

    Julius Guest

    And for additional insight: my family wouldn't even look at me when I left for MEPS to sign my enlistment contract. They're proud of me now, but that doesn't influence me. What matters is that I do my job.

    The military creates an intense love/hate relationship with everything in your life. The main benefit it gave me was that of independence. It drug me into unfamiliar territory and away from everyone I knew. I met new people, some of which were bad, while others were good. It was the worst/best thing that I've done for myself, if you catch my drift.

    Now I'm on my final year in the army. I plan on joining the the french foreign legion (légion étrangère) after I finish school on the GI bill. My folks think I'm nuts, but it's my life.

    You did the right thing.
     
  17. Casino

    Casino OT Supporter

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    I said that in the very first sentence in my original post
     
  18. Casino

    Casino OT Supporter

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    Thanks for the support. I'm hoping they get over this period once I'm contracted, but I honestly cannot predict how they will react when I call in a few months saying I signed the contract.
     

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