SRS Anonymous post: Smoking

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Darketernal, Nov 28, 2007.

  1. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    My dad caught me smoking. Thing is he didn't say anything to me, he's just pretended that he didn't see it. Or so I thought. Turns out he said to my sister that he'd caught me and thought I was stupid for doing it in his own garden. And that he was fed up of me moaning about having no money and spending what he lent me on cigarettes.

    Why does he think it's anything to do with him? Yeah, I live with him, but only till mid-december. I also pay my own way and rarely ask him for any cash. If I do it's usually paid back within a couple of weeks.

    I don't understand why he has to go behind my back rather than telling me things face to face. We've never been that close and he went a bit crazy when he divorced my mom. He had a knife to my throat at one point, because I stopped him from hanging himself Maybe I should have let him do it!

    As far as i see it, smoking isn't a big deal anyway. I'm old enough to make my own decisions. He did say to my sister that he'd leave me to it as its "my life", which is good. Annoying that he tells my sister these things and not me. She smokes too btw, not sure if my dad knows.

    How can I get my dad to be more open about things? He's never even sat me down and told me "the birds and the bees" or any of that other stuff you see on TV. I dunno about my friends and their experiences, not asked anyone as it's a pretty gay situation they'd probably just laugh at me

    Good thing he doesn't know I smoke weed huh.
     
  2. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    He thinks it's to do with him because all of those things you listed are to do with him. It's not about you, he's just using you as an excuse to bitch and vent his frustrations about the stuff that's really bothering him, which he apparently lacks the courage to deal with.

    He's not the first person to get divorced, or to be depressed, or to take his frustrations out on other people. His pain isn't special, except that it's his pain. He could get help if he wanted to. Maybe you can try to help him once you're on your feet again.
     
  3. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Because he's your dad and that's what parents do....raise kids by teaching them what's right and wrong. However, it probably would have been better if he just voiced his concern to you....but by reading the rest of the thread, you guys have way more dysfunction than just communication issues.
    Good for you but I do the same and my mom will tell me things to this day that are "in my business". Guess what, that's life. Parents often will be in your business because they are trying to help.
    Wow....there is a lot here. I really think you should seek professional help. Stopping anyone from committing suicide can be a very difficult thing to handle, emotionally. Add to that an assault with a deadly weapon (something which he should have gone to prison for....yes it's a crime) just adds to the emotional baggage. Then add to it that all this happened at the hands of your dad and holy shit....you've got a lot to work with here.

    I'm sorry this happened to you and I can only imagine how fucked up I'd be after this shit. A professional counselor can help but you might need time to find the right one.
    Smoking is a HUGE deal. It's the #1 cause of preventable deaths. There are more smoking related illnesses than any other activity we do on a regular basis.

    Educate yourself about the risks of smoking. It's horrible for your body and it's far from "no big deal".
    You can't....focus on fixing yourself.
    It's very common to compare yourself to what you see on TV but it's also a recipe for disaster. Most people realize that Hollywood puts out distorted images of family life all the time. It's part of making it appealing, because it's so much different than reality. The key....stop looking to TV for what is "right and normal".

    Indeed....but smoking pot is also extraordinarily bad for your health. Yeah I know, there are many websites from people claiming that pot isn't bad....however, there are also many websites from Medical Professionals that say exactly the opposite.

    The pot smoking community seems to just want to stick their heads in the sand and hope that smoking pot really isn't all that bad for them. The medical evidence doesn't support this idea.
     
  4. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    smoking does make you die sooner. He prolly cares about that part too
     
  5. Redneck Shinobi

    Redneck Shinobi Well Jules, the funny thing about my back is that

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    I know this isn't the place for it, but please you are wrong. Have you actually read the reports for both sides? For every Study the government throws out that is a myth, gets 3 from the other side proving them wrong. The problem is you can bullshit a lie like "Marijuana kills brain cells" and it's automatically taken as truth until mis-proven. I know this isn't the place for spreading my rhetoric, but I'm just here to tell you, you're wrong.

    Do you object to people eating it then? or what about vaporizers?



    Going back to topic, that's weird he didn't confront you right then and there. It could have been just done and over with, but now it's just going to grow until it gets thrown out again and again, over nothing, or when he can't win an argument.

    Too get him to open up you are going to have to make the first move. I'm assuming, but from your description he sounds like he is very non confrontational, and chooses to fight his war behind the scenes. You're going to have to confide in him and get him to do more. I doubt he will jump at an opportunity by itself.
     
  6. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Government doesn't equal science.

    Number of people preaching something doesn't make it right or wrong. Just because 10,000 pot heads yell "NUH UH" doesn't change the fact that scientists are discovering the very damaging effects of pot smoke.

    Have I read reports? Yep. Here's one from the National Institutes for Health.....read this as it has very sound medical advice and information.
    http://www.nida.nih.gov/Infofacts/marijuana.html
    Here is part of what it says:
    A study of 450 individuals found that people who smoke marijuana frequently but do not smoke tobacco have more health problems and miss more days of work than nonsmokers8. Many of the extra sick days among the marijuana smokers in the study were for respiratory illnesses.

    It goes on to say
    Smoking marijuana possibly increases the likelihood of developing cancer of the head or neck. A study comparing 173 cancer patients and 176 healthy individuals produced evidence that marijuana smoking doubled or tripled the risk of these cancers10

    I'll take the word of physicians and scientists over pot smokers any day of the of the week.

    So instead of saying "YOU'RE WRONG" provide support. Read that article I linked....look for trained medical professional opinions not fellow pot head that don't want to believe there is anything wrong with smoking.
     
  7. Redneck Shinobi

    Redneck Shinobi Well Jules, the funny thing about my back is that

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    Wow I wasn't expecting this reply, but ok... So other real scientist who don't smoke weed, but study it and find out myths, are just "pot heads".

    I asked you a question, that you seemed to miss. What if they eat it? or use a vaporizer? Can I argue against cancer?

    There are lots of things that can kill you in this world. Marijuana has never been proven as the cause of death. Show me a direct study where Marijuana is blamed for lung cancer. Show me a study where it is a proven fact Marijuana caused it.


    I can get links too....
    http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/05/25/AR2006052501729_pf.html

    We really shouldn't take our debate here, since it's not related to this topic at all and I'm sorry to the OP for this :/
     
  8. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    No...that's not what I ment at all. However, there have been a great many people throw up websites that claim pot isn't bad for you....and these have been quoted to me in other threads as if they are "THE TRUTH" while my references get discounted. So in order to short circuit that process, I wanted to make it clear that a pot head's opinion is irrelevant compared to scientific analysis.
    I didn't respond to those questions because IMO they obscure the issue of smoking pot.....smoking is the thing we are talking about here. These questions are off topic.
    I gave you a link and quoted earlier where in it there are some very alarming facts. A) it sure doesn't sound like you read that linked article B)in my previous post I clearly quote that it increases the risks by as much as 3 times. C) I can find links or examples of smokers that have smoked cigs (not pot) their whole lives and they don't have cancer.....does that lessen the harmful effects of cigarettes? Of course not.

    Look science often doesn't give direct conclusions like smoking pot causes death. That's an extreme that you are taking this argument to because you don't want to believe the facts. The facts are that science is starting to wake up to the facts that smoking pot can be very damaging to your health. It puts one in a high risk category just the same way that smoking cigs does. Does that mean that every pot smoker will get cancer?? Of course not. Does it mean that you are more likely to get cancer?? It sure does.

    Look cigs, I read somewhere that there are over 40 known carcinogens in a cigarette. That's 40 different things that are known to cause or contribute to the formation of cancerous cells in the body.....yet people still smoke every day.

    Just because lots of people smoke pot doesn't make it safe.
    Be sure to read carefully:
    Tashkin found that even the very heavy marijuana smokers showed no increased incidence of the three cancers studied.
    I have not reviewed his evidence but he's only studying 3 types of cancer. Ok....so lets throw out all the other forms that might be relevant? WTF?? Why limit his research??

    Also of note, his previous research showed a positive link between cancer and pot smoke. So his own research is conflicted.....this calls into question his abilities.

    Me thinks you would rather throw out links, make broad claims and dismiss other evidence to support your ideas. Great....stick your head in the sand much?
    Look...if you hadn't been so vocal about how wrong I was (something which I've shown to be incorrect) this never would have started up. We don't need to debate this any further as I have no desire to convince you or anyone else to quit smoking pot. That's not my job nor is it my concern....afterall we are all free to fuck ourselves up in many different ways.

    Cigarette smoking is known to be harmful to your health and no matter how much scientific evidence is shown that proves this, people will dismiss it and keep right on smoking. That's what you're doing with pot. I hope you don't get cancer but a smart person would do themselves a lot of good to look at the scientific links between smoking pot and cancer. It's surprising and startling.
     
  9. JustJeff

    JustJeff www.youtube.com/thisisjustjeff

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    Just like religion!



    My suggestion to the OP: When you get yourself straightened out (cause i don't know if you've realized, you're father isn't the only one that has problems here), you need to sit down with your father and talk to him. You need to ask him about his concerns for you, and instead of fighting with him, LISTEN. Don't talk back to him, don't interrupt him, don't put him down. Let him talk to you, let him express his feelings to you. When he realizes that you are listening instead of fighting, he will stop fighting with you.
     
  10. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    How about if you people stay on topic. He wasn't asking for help with his pot habit.
     
  11. Redneck Shinobi

    Redneck Shinobi Well Jules, the funny thing about my back is that

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    Yeah I even put in my two cents on my first post. I never ment for it to go this far, I just don't like it when people claim it's "extraordinarily bad for your health" when there are a hell of a lot more things bad for you ahead of it, including alcohol and cigarettes, so I don't see this as an issue for him in the slightest, which is why it could have been ignored in the first place.


    Look cootie, we can go on and on, and we are not going to change each others minds. There is a reason you can't answer my question and we both already know the answer. You can say it's not related, but the truth is, they are. Like how you won't find a single case of marijuana killing anyone, because it is less harmful, than a lot of things out there. I think we can agree that the other is wrong. This isn't the place for it and I'd gladly debate you in another forum.
     
  12. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Do not presume to speak for me or say you know the answers that I would give. You don't and any attempt by you is an error....no matter how smart you think you are.
    Jesus, you are so wrong and you don't even realize it....why the hell should I continue to debate with you when you think eating and smoking pot are related?? Not to mention, the evidence isn't pointing to the harmful effects of eating pot...it's specifically pointing to smoking it.

    Your inability to understand and comprehend the differences in this are one of the main reasons for me continuing this debate in this thread....and for my continuation below.
    There you go again....continuing the debate and making false claims but then throwing up your hands and saying, "this isn't the place". There's a phrase for that, it's called a "cheap shot". Don't do that.
    Feel free to start it up a thread and point me to it. However, don't be surprised if I don't participate. The reason is not because I don't want to answer difficult questions or because I think my logic is flawed....nothing could be further from the truth. I've simply reached a place in life where see the futility of reasoning with certain people.

    Like I've said before....smoking cigs is very bad for people, there's mountains of scientific evidence supporting that, yet people still smoke like chimneys. I have no desire to argue about the harmful effects of smoking with them because they want to believe that it's not as harmful as the scientist say it is. They want to go on killing themselves and putting themselves at risk.

    Why should I take my time to educate them or even argue with them?? It's boring and gets old fast. I'd rather do about a million other things that are more fun. I suspect any debate that you enter into regarding the harmful effects of smoking pot would be as futile as those with smokers that really don't want to look at the truth....they'd just rather go on with their happy lives.

    So feel free to make a thread for the debate and send me a PM on it's location. I may or may not engage....depending on my mood.

    To the OP: You can and will believe whatever you want. It was my desire to give you evidence of the harmful effects of smoking pot because it is most definitely relevant to your life and your health. My hope is that by looking at the scientific evidence you will make up your own mind about the harmful effects of smoking pot. It seems that here at OT there are many vocal people that either don't believe the science supporting it or don't want to believe the science. Whatever their motivations, I felt compelled to share what I've discovered in my searching.

    Hopefully you found benefits and clarifications....but regardless....cheers and good luck to you. I'm done with this thread.
     
  13. Redneck Shinobi

    Redneck Shinobi Well Jules, the funny thing about my back is that

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    I was ending the debate not a cheap shot, go live your life the way you want. I really could care less how you live your life, as long as it doesn't interfere with mine. I am not speaking for you, was just waiting for the answer.

    I never said smoking isn't bad for you? There are a lot of chemicals in tobacco, and there is scientific evidence of dangerous health effects from it.

    Do you know what a vaporizer is? It burns the cannabis at a heat that is just enough to only burn the THC. So you don't deal with the tar of smoking. It is smoking, but pure. What if the OP did it that way? Would you have still wrote that part in your initial post? I know smoking is bad, in fact I don't smoke. I won't reply to this here anymore. Another forum would be good, I always like a debate :)


    Good luck OP, you got lots of good peeps in here to help ya.
     
  14. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    1. It was too a cheap shot. I was going to say something but decided against it at first. If you wanted to end the debate then you wouldn't have presented any more evidence for your case.

    2. The problem is the OP would still be using an illegal drug, which has enormous consequences in adult life, regardless of method.

    3. I'm going to repost my first post because it got totally ignored:

    He thinks it's to do with him because all of those things you listed are to do with him. It's not about you, he's just using you as an excuse to bitch and vent his frustrations about the stuff that's really bothering him, which he apparently lacks the courage to deal with.

    He's not the first person to get divorced, or to be depressed, or to take his frustrations out on other people. His pain isn't special, except that it's his pain. He could get help if he wanted to. Maybe you can try to help him once you're on your feet again.
     

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