SRS ANON POST: I want to do some cocaine.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by i killed tupac, Sep 22, 2008.

  1. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    ANON POST:
    I just got this gut feeling I'm going to use again tonight, i just dont know what to say to myself/tell myself not too.

    /ANON
     
  2. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    MY REPLY:

    Cravings are a strange thing, aren't they? If you think you can't stop thinking about it now, just wait till that dope enters your system again. The disease has two parts: obsession and compulsion. Obsession is the neverending stream of thought related to using drugs-and compulsion is the inability to stop once we have started.

    You did the right thing-the first step teaches us that we are powerless over addiction-so you have already realized that. It sounds like you already know there is nothing you can say to yourself to stop.

    Enter 12 step programs-we help each other. Reaching out today is the best thing you could have done. This is the start. You call me, you call a sponsor, you call a help line, you go to a meeting- you stay clean.

    Here's some things to think about until one or more of those things happen for you:

    Now, the first thing you do is WAIT. Think you cant stay clean all night? Try staying clean 5 minutes at a time. That how i've done it, 9 years now and the most intense parts of my recovery have been matters of minutes.

    I can never think of a time when i did not use when i was upset, then later wished that i had-but there were several times when i used that i wished i hadn't. Call someone. Call me if you need too, I have PMed you my phone number, or go to NA.org for local help. Read the first 3 steps in "It Works, How and Why", then call me if you still want to use.
     
  3. Daveee

    Daveee New Member

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    How's this for simple: you do the blow, you're throwing away whatever time you have clean. You probably won't die, you probably won't sell all your possessions for more coke, and you probably won't get arrested...but how are you going to feel when you wake up the next morning and realize what you did the night before? You have the ability to make the CONSCIOUS DECISION, right this second, either to do the cocaine or not do the cocaine. If you do use, you made that CHOICE. This "we are powerless over our addiction" 12-step nonsense is just that - a crock of shit. You need to make the decision and stick with it.
     
  4. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    How is a personal development course with 12 parts a crock of shit? What is wrong with admitting you cannot control drug use, finding something else, doing that something, cleaning up the past and helping others? :confused:
     
  5. Daveee

    Daveee New Member

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    Nothing at all, assuming it ACTUALLY helps you and makes your life fulfilling without turning you into an automaton who spouts off AA catch phrases.

    However, when a program such as the 12 steps convinces its hundreds of thousands of devout followers that they are literally powerless to stop themselves from using drugs (I'm not talking about moderation here, I'm talking about abstinence vs. using period), it is doing more harm than good on the whole. What SHOULD be taught is personal responsibility and intelligent, well-measured decision making when confronted with an urge to use a drug.
     
  6. Daveee

    Daveee New Member

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    By the way, I'm not trolling, I'm saying something that I wish I had been told before I wasted more than a year of my life pissing and moaning in 12 step programs rather than getting to the root of my problems.
     
  7. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    Well, that is probably a debate that could rage on forever. The truth is, 12 step programs have worked for millions, and will continue to work. Whatever helps anyone stay right and live comfortably is a good thing.

    Anyways, TS, an update?
     
  8. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    ANON REPLY:

    on post in r2r
    Okay, I did end up using. However, I didn't do much, I ended up throwing away half of it. I had a feeling of guilt right after I used, and it wasn't a good experience. I hope, really hope, that when I get urges again, I can look back and re live this situation, and let it be enough to deter me from using again.

    In response to the 12 step ideals. NO, I won't partake. But, I do take a lot of those ideals in stride. I just simply won't do a 12 step program for personal reasons that can obviously be understood.

    Thanks guys

    /ANON
     
  9. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    wasn't the last time a bad time too? So, what programs will you try? I know there are some great non12 step programs out there that have worked for many people! Most hospitals offer one, and a lot of state agencies offer free help too.
    best of luck!
     
  10. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    ANON REPLY:

    I live in Canada, so the programs up here are similar. Obviously we still have 12 step programs locally available, but I can't do it. I'm religious, but I don't hold the same values as others do. Step #3 is the "I can't do this" step for me.

    Just from browsing the R2R forum, I've gained a lot of aspect and perception.


    /ANON
     

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