animalpak.com stories >*

Discussion in 'Fitness & Nutrition Archives' started by il_duce, Jan 29, 2005.

  1. il_duce

    il_duce OT Supporter

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    "yeah, this one time I was doing my 45th set of squats with 600lbs., and in the middle of my 12th rep, my hamstring snapped and rolled up my leg. At that point, I had to make a decision: be a pussy and rack it, or keep going for 3 more reps. I wasn't going to let the iron beat me, so I started the three reps of 600lb. single leg squats. On the second rep, I had built up so much pressure in my gut that one of my eyes popped out. I didn't care, I was going to finish that set if it killed me. Yeah, some would say I'm an animal. I'm just doing what I've got to do."
    :noes:
    http://www.animalpak.com/html/article_details.cfm?section=livin&ID=118

    It's something to think about.
     
  2. michael

    michael FLORIDA > *

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    :hsugh:
     
  3. cavefish

    cavefish You ain't a crook son, you just a shook one

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    I'm a moron who thought the quoted text was what was on the page. Doh. This thread is now about making up Animal stories and posting them.
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2005
  4. Hood Moses

    Hood Moses I part the Black Seas...

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  5. Hood Moses

    Hood Moses I part the Black Seas...

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    :rofl:
     
  6. iCe

    iCe Active Member

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    Mine has a piece of shit by the corner. :hsugh:




    jp
     
  7. cavefish

    cavefish You ain't a crook son, you just a shook one

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    Let's write our own Animal stories!

    "So there I was in the gym, finishing my up 10th set of 200lb DB bench presses. I had done 42 reps on this set but as I went to do the 43rd my wrist snapped in half and I dropped the DB's to the floor. But I don't stop there because I ain't no goddamn pussy. I took a hammer and smashed my broken wrist and hand into pieces, then wrapped it around the dumbell like a strap and finished my set. Then after 50 reps I dropped the dumbells on my face because I'm a hardcore motherfucker. I started spitting blood at a kid doing curls in the mirror then whipped my penis out and crushed it under the stack on the lat pulldown machine. This is hardcore, this is Animal. Can you handle it?"
     
  8. Werdna

    Werdna Livin' the SLO Life...

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    im high, but still :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
     
  9. DerekForeal

    DerekForeal Diamond Member

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    hah, I did the same, I was like wtf animal is such bs, then I was like wait... something is a little fishy here. rofl, good thread.
     
  10. PurEvl

    PurEvl going out gassed and not half assed...

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    I was on my 57th pullup when the video camera died and I had to go back to my internet forum empty handed. I also lost all the footage of my 800 pound dead lift. This is animal bullshit...can you handle it?



    *its only a joke so dont get pissy*
     
  11. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    omg :rofl: :rofl:

    :bowdown:
     
  12. Hood Moses

    Hood Moses I part the Black Seas...

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    :rofl:
     
  13. MikeTheVike1

    MikeTheVike1 OT Supporter

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    "I was training my large Pectorals on a bench when I see some punk bitch frat boys eyeing my bench. When I was done with my set I pulled my my cock and ball out and pissed all over the bench to show them its mine. A PT came up to me with this faggot attitude so I headbutt him into the mirror, then busted a lat spread in the shattered glass. Before leaving I shit on the front counter and threw a dollar to the worker. Heres a tip..Don't fuck with the animal."
     
  14. Phlab

    Phlab OT Supporter

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    "I loaded up 750 pounds onto the bar above my bench, 2, 100's at a time. I layed down and unracked that weight and started pumping that shit. On my 11th rep, my pectorals snapped off my chest and rolled up towards my armpits like the top of a sardine can. While holding the weight in a locked out position, I tilted my head up and gazed down at a smorgasboard of internal organs and flesh, now fully exposed, pulsating in my ribcage. I could've racked that shit, but I knew that I wasnt gonna be a little bitch about a fucking scratch. I shifted one of my hands to the middle of the bar, and held the 750 up with one arm. I fuckin rolled my pecs back onto my chest, tore off my dick, and used used a nearby nailgun to graft that shit back together. That's animal pak intensity - That's animal pak pride."
     
  15. Perkwunos

    Perkwunos Dog Bones OT Supporter

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  16. D-GUy

    D-GUy Guest

    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: @ "stories"
     
  17. michael

    michael FLORIDA > *

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    :rofl:
     
  18. PurEvl

    PurEvl going out gassed and not half assed...

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    :rofl: bwahahahaha
     
  19. Ilyusha

    Ilyusha Guest

  20. PurEvl

    PurEvl going out gassed and not half assed...

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    anyone remember my patrick batemen story in the main forum...man was he mad at me :rofl:
     
  21. ~stangzorized~

    ~stangzorized~ New Member

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    I've honestly never laughed this hard reading OT ever. :rofl:
     
  22. Jeg1983

    Jeg1983 OT Supporter

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    :rofl:
     
  23. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    :rofl: best thread in f&n in awhile

    EDIT: nvm.. the thread ceaze made with steel cut oats was pretty recent and was funny as hell
     
  24. michael

    michael FLORIDA > *

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    "It was my first time attempting a 2500 lb squat without my gear. I was nervous. I knew deep down inside that I could do it, I had taken my animal pak vitamins and I could feel the pump rushing through my vascular, hardened body. I stepped up to the squat rack and got under the massive amounts of steel. I pushed off and easily unracked the 1.25 tons that were now sitting on my monstrous shoulders. I lowered my ass to the ground (if it dont touch, it dont count!)...at this point I squeezed with all my might to raise the weight when I felt something happen. I easily put the 2500 lbs up and re-racked it and took a look behind me. It seems most of my intestines and internal organs had dropped completely out of my ass, I guess I blew my sphincter out. Anyhow, I picked up the liver and pancreas and examined them. I remember reading in Men's Health that you needed protein to keep these organs healthy, so I figured they were packed to the brim with casein and whey, so I started munching down on them. Hell, what's a cheaper source of protein than the kind you produce yourself, right? So after I finished about 4 organs I decided to throw another 1,000 on the bar. Again, unracking it was easy, I got it up when I heard something in my back tear. I re-racked the weight and turned so I could see my posterior in the mirror. What the fuck? My spine was jutting out of the top of my neck! Oh well, the animal inside of me knew what had to be done, I had seen enough movies! I pulled my spine completely out of my back and wrapped it around my forehead, creating the coolest god damn bandana I had ever seen (Rambo, take that!). I grabbed an ez-curl bar and shoved it where my spine previously was and went about my workout. Some people think I'm crazy. I think I'm an Animal."

    -Troy, avid animal pak user since 2002
     
  25. michael

    michael FLORIDA > *

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    hence not creative if you're going on fact, you jack-ass. :slap:
     

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