Discussion in 'On Topic' started by dOOfus, May 10, 2007.
Anyone know of anything I can do that can help me control my anger problems? I need help.
Lots and lots of approaches to this. One, you could look for anger management classes/professional guidance in your area.
You could look for ways to safely calm yourself down once you are angry...it could be doing a certain activity, deep breathing, going to a certain place, etc.
I'd recommend using the ABC method. I seem to remember is standing for antecedent, behavior, consequence (not 100% certain though). Look for things that trigger you anger, if possible change things so that they happen less. Look at the behavior...look at ways of containing/controlling your anger while you are angry. Then, look at things you can do afterwards to help.
If you really think it is a problem, I recommend just looking into a professional class/counselor, etc. It may turn out that you don't need that much support, but hey, it won't hurt if you get more than you need.
You could also just start Googling "anger management" to start getting some ideas.
I always calmed myself down by smoking or drinking
I started working out when I got angry. I would run as much as I could so by the time I got back, I was too tired to be angry about anything, and it felt good. I picked up lifting too, which is a great stress/anger reliever for me.
well, drinking is not the answer, because if hes getting angry alot, then hes gonna be a damn drunk, and that'll lead to more problems he'll be posting on OT in 3 months.....
it all depends on how bad it is. sometimes, if you just get pissed easily, you can stop yourself, visualize a stop sign in your head and say in you head "ok stop, think for 5 minutes about the situation, and if i'm still mad then, i will deal with it then." a majority of the time, you'll come to realize the situation is not worth being as angry as you would have been, and you'll be able to approach it with a much clearer mind. if its alot worse than that, then basically, your anger issues come from a long chain of events throughout your life. there is no one way to deal with anger because neither you, nor anyone else here, can get into your past and see what you have these issues. therefor, your best bet is to get into therapy or counsling. you'd be shocked at the things they can uncover just by asking you questions, hearing your replies, see how you act, talk, etc. i know a professional can get to the bottom of this, so i would strongly urge you to take that route.
I mean, I don't get angry that often. But it seems that when I do, I start yelling and cussing. Nobody can seem to calm me down either, except for the Marlboro man.
I read a few different books after I really realized I had a problem, gave me a lot of insight into things. Made me look at certain things in my life differently, and made me change myself. When I get back into my room, I'll list the ones that really helped.
Counseling can help, but you have to have the right counselor. Plus, I think it's beneficial to have people that have been affected because your anger go with you a few times to give the counselor a different viewpoint on things and say some things you don't realize or won't admit. However, the problem with that is that some of those people may be long gone at this point.
Ok...the books I think are good:
The Anger Trap - Dr. Les Carter: Great book, by far the best one I've read. Talks about different things that can trigger anger, both from the past and from your current life. Also talks about how to turn anger into something positive. Gives you ideas on how to change your thinking about certain things and whatnot. I'd defenitely read this one.
Beyond Anger, A Guide For Men - Thomas Harbin: It's geared towards guys. Defenitely pick this book up as well.
Getting Over Getting Mad - Judy Ford: Just a bunch of little short stories or passages about anger, with it broken into four parts: anger with yourself, your s/o, children, and colleagues.
Check them out. I honestly think reading did a lot more for me than anything else.