LGBT Age gaps

Discussion in 'Lifestyle' started by D-FENS, Sep 26, 2009.

  1. D-FENS

    D-FENS New Member

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    Anybody here involved with anyone much older or younger than them? I've been looking, but I just can't seem to find any young guys in Phoenix who are actually masculine - no offense to you twinks out there, but I'm a bear man. However, through my searches I did come across one guy who really did seem like a good match for me, but he's 42. I'm 20. Considering the "cougar principle," that any 20 year old guy would jump at the change to hook up with a hot 42 year old woman, I can't find anything actually wrong with getting involved with someone so much older than me, but I'm still feeling wierd about it.
    I guess more than anything else, I'm looking for some justification to just bite the bullet and go for it with this guy.
     
  2. Sam Gamgee

    Sam Gamgee Every tool is a weapon if you hold it right. OT Supporter

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    When I was 35, I tried to date a 21 year old. And as much as I liked him, I couldn't get past the age gap. We had such a difference in life experiences.

    Currently, I'm 38 and my partner is turning 32 in a couple of weeks. That's the biggest age gap I'd do.
     
  3. philvia

    philvia SUCKIN ON MY TITTIES LIKE YOU WANTIN ME CALLIN ME

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    im 20 and my friend/boyfriend/idontknowwhathefuckweare is 24.... may not sound like much but it's a considerable age gap for me:o
     
  4. novo

    novo Pokey Man OT Supporter

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    i've known a few relationships with large age gaps.
    they usually don't work out, but some do. :dunno:

    do you feel like you "need" to be in a relationship?
     
  5. Elusid

    Elusid New Member

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    Idk I've been with a 30yo before and I'm 18. I didn't have a problem with it and I don't think he did either I just moved off to college =/
     
  6. D-FENS

    D-FENS New Member

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    It would definitely be more of a friends with benefits kind of thing, rather than a typical relationship. I'm looking for some sort of emotional connection, not just two strangers who fuck every now and then, but I'm certainly not looking for a "lover" or "boyfriend". I definitely am attracted to older guys, and there are plenty of guys in their 40's and 50's I can talk to can get along with just like any other friend of mine.
     
    Last edited: Sep 27, 2009
  7. DouggieJ

    DouggieJ OT Supporter

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    If it's more or less just for sex, I'd say go for it if you're attracted to him. Age might only become an issue if you want to get into a relationship.
     
  8. Macbeth

    Macbeth That's illogical... OT Supporter

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    Similar for me. I'm 19, and my boyfriend is 24. It's an obstacle.
     
  9. Matitulo

    Matitulo If sexy never left then why is everybody on my shi

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    one of my close friends is 22 and engaged to someone in their 40's :dunno:

    if it works, it works
     
  10. aenergi

    aenergi New Member

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    I'm 23 and my fiance/bf is 30. It really works out just fine.
    _d
     
  11. Josey

    Josey New Member

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    when I was 30 I dated a couple of 38-40yr olds...and sometimes it was bliss and the other times I wanted to set them on fire.
     
  12. stevenlk

    stevenlk New Member

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    its all on you, im 23 i dated a 29 and 33 but i like them older, but keep in mind your' both on different levels in life but you can make work if its meant to . age is nothing but a number. if its there its there. go for it.
     
  13. geniks

    geniks king of the hill

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    *looks around* OKAY I am currently dating somebody much older (almost scared to say now) LOL! My boyfriend is in his 40's and i am in my early 20's. We've been together now for 3 months... I still don't even know how to tell my parents or brothers i'm in a relationship with somebody as old as my parents.. I like this guy a lot though - and hes super hot :).

    How long can i go like this? I'm not sure.. It's great now but in 5 years i'm not so sure.. all i know is that i'm enjoying it today and i'm having a great relationship at the moment. Sometimes I think i'm crazy - but i am really doing what I want to do and not what other people think is socially acceptable.

    THIS is an awful picture of myself (ughhh eww ) i should cut it out but i'm too lazy.. but here is his picture, he is on the left:

    [​IMG]
     
  14. jordan04

    jordan04 The seeds of love have taken hold, and if we won't

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    in the words of samantha jones regarding alexander petrovsky (carrie's older man) "he's been around the block and knows how to use his cock" why not?
     
  15. Bib-Lettuce

    Bib-Lettuce New Member

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    Personally I think age is just a number, in the end it depends on the person.
     
  16. Orly_Yarly

    Orly_Yarly New Member

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    ^^ Agreed. Have known several people with great differences in age. However, sad to say, most of those people, as the youngest in the relationship, are the only ones left - as their SO have passed well before they will. I see THAT being the only obstical.
     
    Last edited: Oct 1, 2009
  17. BTCollins

    BTCollins I met a gypsy and she hipped me to some life game

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    You say that but regardless how much people boast about not caring what other people think it will take a toll on you and unfortunately, people tend to look down on couples with a significant age gap :(


    ...just sayin'
     
  18. Bib-Lettuce

    Bib-Lettuce New Member

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    I agree with that, I just meant within the relationship, like maturity levels, what people want, etc. Age is usually a good indicator but not an absolute and it depends on the person in the end. But yeah like you said that stuff needs to be taken into account as well.
     
  19. MeanGreen

    MeanGreen New Member

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    Im kind of in the same place right now. Most of the guys around here that are in my age group are either way to gay for me, losers, CRAZY, or are just trying to skimp by in life w/o an effort. I have meet lost of guys older that are a bit older than me but I still feel very strang about being w/them longer term. I feel like I'm going to reach an age where they are now, and they will have aged to the point where we just don't have the same ambitions in life anymore as I do/will. Almost feels like jumping into something that you know if going to fail, although nothing will ever succeed when you go into it with that mentality.
     
  20. RyRy

    RyRy Active Member

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    I completely agree. However I would probably fall into the classification of "trying to skimp by life w/o an effort" because I'm technically not employed. I do so much for family members that that is my job! It's going to SUCK when I need to re-enter the job market in a few years. I mean it's not like you can just put "2008-201X cared for elderly family member who was ill while attending college" Granted I can always put working on family farm or Brad's business or something I guess.
     
  21. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    Oh, shit... When did you get back on OT? How's NY treating ya? (You know the Closet has a few peeps there, including some other transplants from MD...just saying.) I need to get back to the States and party with your brother. Or he needs to bring his gay ass BACK to Africa!
     
  22. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    To D-FENS:
    Trust Samantha. For most of my young life, I played almost exclusively with older men. It wasn't until college that I really considered really being with someone my own age--and that was only because he was so damn mature!

    Give it an honest go.
     
  23. MeanGreen

    MeanGreen New Member

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    Skimping by does not mean not having a job. Its just that just want that bare minimum in life. I'm not down with that
     
  24. MeanGreen

    MeanGreen New Member

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    i won't lie to you about that lol could be.

    But to be 100% honest, most of the guys my age act like total children and get wrapped up in so much drama its ridiculous

    I don't do Drama :squint: its a waste of my time
     
  25. D-FENS

    D-FENS New Member

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    I would much prefer my first gay relationship/hookup to be with someone my own age. I'm all for fucking older guys once I've gotten myself accustomed to the whole idea of dating/hooking up, but I'd prefer to start things out with someone my own age. Like I said (being bi), I'd totally jump at the opportunity to get in bed with a hot 42 year old woman now that I have already been with girls my own age, but I'm not sure I'd want to lose my virginity to a 42 year old woman.

    If you know where in Phoenix/Tempe I can find masculine gay guys my own age, I'm all ears. I'm under 21 so bars are out of the question, I want nothing to do with the whole club scene (if there even are any under 21 clubs here), I made a profile on bear411 but it seems like theres nothing but older guys on there, and I posted on craigslist and I'm not getting any responses other than "HEY BRO UR HOT LETS HOOK UP TONIGHT. 5'11" 160LBS 6IN COCK U HOST - GOTTA BE DISCREET", with the exception of this said older guy I'm considering.
     

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