Advice Needed

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by jdmdisco, Apr 12, 2006.

  1. jdmdisco

    jdmdisco OT Supporter

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    I broke up with my gf of one year because i needed some time alone. She had become very clingy and she was talking about marriage etc etc.
    Well its been a few months and i realized how much i missed her and i want her back in my life. Recently we have been talking a lot more and slowly rebuilding our friendship.

    Heres the problem...I am transferring to a different university 4 hours away in May and she is thinking about moving in together. But the other day she asked me "what plans do i have to make things work?"

    i dont know how to answer this, any help suggestion or advice would be appreciated:hs:
     
  2. Vailripper

    Vailripper Daywalkers have feelings too.

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    If you guys aren't on the same page then you aren't on the same page. Asking an internet forum what I should do to mend a relationship...where all you have told us is what she did wrong...isn't going to help much.

    With that said, it sounds like she is looking for a serious relationship, while you are looking for something more relaxed. Maybe if you made that clear to her, should would lose the clinglyness, but I doubt it :/
     
  3. 127.0.0.1

    127.0.0.1 New Member

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    how old are you two?
     
  4. jdmdisco

    jdmdisco OT Supporter

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    shes 19, i am 21
     
  5. jab1983

    jab1983 40/40 crew failure with less than 1 week to go...D

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    She's 19, she will fall for any line :bigthumb: tell her this.


    you would be happy to have her move in with you (if you really want her there) but until you graduate you won't be financially secure enough to provide for both of you, because of that unfortunately both of you would have to work in order to chip in together with the bills so that you two can get your own apartment. Tell her that when you were apart you saw how much you need her and that you would do anything to be with her because you see a
    "long term commitment with her" but that until you graduate and can provide for both of you the most You can give her is your love and your promise to be a great boyfriend.


    That way she moves with you, helps pay for shit :bigthumb:
    Also you have avoided marriage talk until you graduate:bigthumb:
     
  6. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    you already broke up because you needed time, what are you going to do down the road when you need time again? Moving in together is ALOT like marriage...you get to know someone ALOT better than you ever thought possible.

    Id just end the relationship now, you have already had doubts once. Now you are moving away...dont try to make this something its not. If you are meant to be together, you can come back to each other after you graduate.
     
  7. jdmdisco

    jdmdisco OT Supporter

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    thanks for the input
    i DO want to be with her but i dont know what kind of guarantee she wants from me. I know i broke her heart before that’s why she lost some trust in me.
     
  8. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    so you are going away for school? Is she going to transfer to that school too? What will she be doing while you live together.

    If you are going to live together and keep a relationship...then it needs to be a very STRONG relationship. If you are going to live together and not expect a relationship, then things can go pretty well.

    Living with anyone is HARD...people are just different, and you get to know someone better than you had ever imagined. To make it you need to either truely love each other, or not really give a damn about each other...atleast in my experience.

    It may work out great for you, but it just sounds like a bad situation to me...
     

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