A lil help here

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by AstroGirl, Jul 21, 2005.

  1. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    Okay so here’s the deal I met a guy online about 1 ½ years ago. We talked through emails/ IM/ and the telephone for a little over a year before we finally decided to meet in person. We took a little vacation in Florida and sparks FLEW! We have since then been doing the long distance thing, I see him about every month, and we talk for about an hour every night. There was never any discussions of commitment and it was more or less sort of a fun thing. I was dating other people, as was he. Well about a month ago things got a little more serious and we decided to stop dating other people. So I stopped seeing the girl and guy I was seeing, and I was not aware if he was even seeing anyone else at the time.

    So two weeks after that decision had been made I go onto myspace and see en email from a random chick saying that my mans pic was on another page. Curious I go to this girls page and see that she is "in a relationship" with my man. So I call him, and ask him what is up.

    I guess he and this girl started seeing each other (long distance) before he and I did. And he had not called it off with her yet. He said he would, and he did. Her page was all heartbroken for about a week with a poem about how much she loved him, etc. To sum it up I felt like shit. But basically the way he puts it was that it was fun with her and he liked her, but he didn’t love her and didn’t see a future with her. With me he did.

    So that was that, we had cut all ties with our other people and it was just going to be "us." Well today I go onto her page and see that there are still pics of him up there. Hmmmm. She knows about him and I, and we had actually exchanged emails a few days ago about it. Basically just me saying Brad and I were together, I am sorry for her loss/ she seems like a sweet girl/ etc. So she knows about him and I. And I know for a fact that he is not physically seeing this girl anymore, he is studying for the bar exam on tue/wed next week and I talk to him every night. So is she doing this to make me jealous? To ruin my relationship that is so fresh? Or should I ask him about it again? There were still pics up last week and I had inquired about them and he said he doesn’t talk to there anymore, and he has no idea why there are pics up.

    I am going to see him next week, I am not a jealous person, but I don’t know what to do here. Any suggestions?
     
  2. okita1

    okita1 Great spirits have always encountered violent oppo

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    its a little weird, that he didnt break it off with her until you mentioned something, but he did. dont sweat it too much, but dont go rushing into things also. basically play it cool
     
  3. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    Jealousy is not a bad thing in moderation. Its what keeps us on our toes and aware of what is going on in our relationship. I would say that since a relationship is founded and based on trust, you should talk to him about it once and for all. Don’t leave anything out, hit it all that way there is no room for "what if's". You are a great girl and anyone who knows you would be lucky to give it a shot with you. The distance thing is never an easy task, trust me, I’m there with you on that one :)



    Just call him and ask what’s up, be honest and expect nothing less from him. If this is going to work, you are going to have to endure the hardships for now until you can see him again. Things will work out love trust me on that one. Our heads are our worst enemy's! They fill our thoughts with cheating and wondering if they actually love us anymore. Funny thing is that both sides do it. Where there is a lack of communication, there is a lack of feeling and trust. Both of which are important to any relationship.



    When you see him in a week, good feelings will flood back and you will have a great time, leaving you something to look forward to when you get to see him again. Remember to stay present in the moment... You will never get "right now" back again. Meaning if you are spending all of your time in a worry state, you lose all the good going on around you, and the memories you could be creating. You and I will beat this head game.... you just wait and see!



    chin up love.... things are just fine!
     
  4. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    :kiss: Thank you okita1 and Squirley :mamoru:

    I was not sure wether I should throw a tantrum or not. I just need to RELAX!

    I think I am not going to say anything to him until I am out there though, just so I can see how things are first ;)

    This is really difficult...
     
  5. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    sure..... take your time and think it through.... just make sure you are not making a big deal in your head out of nothing ya know? the mail man visited you too :wavey:
     
  6. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    Hee hee, okay ;)
     
  7. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    I am really trying too, I am glad someone else sees this in a different perspective ;)
     
  8. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    sorry... but I am a guy.... and I place about -50% reality in Myspace or anything like that.... for me.. I still had pics up of my ex on there from like a year before... and never use it... then my current GF back in the day was like what the fuck! and I told her I never use it ..... and if it was there I didnt care....

    becuase I was with you "silly girl":squint:

    so you see... I dont find it odd....
     
  9. okita1

    okita1 Great spirits have always encountered violent oppo

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    im sure it will all work out, good luck, and have fun next week :)
     
  10. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    Ha ha "silly girl" you know too mcuh!

    Thanx sweets. I think she is doing it to make me jealous. I talked with my best friend about it over lunch and she said she would sure as hell do the same thing if she were in this other girls shoes. I think I would too!
     
  11. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    aww... no worries... even tho i'm not an addict or anything, i have pics on myspace as well. a lot of pics are of me with girl friends of mine, but there are a few of me with guys. i am not dating any of them, but they're still up there.

    :dunno: maybe she likes herself in the pictures. i really wouldn't let it bother you. i understand why you would feel that way tho.

    ;) this is why i feel ld relationships are a :nono: BUT... you didn't ask my opinion on that :o
     
  12. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    Haha thanx chica. I was wondering where you were.
     
  13. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    :rofl: :eek3: ;)
     
  14. ProneToEpisodes

    ProneToEpisodes New Member

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    Am I allowed to say anything?

    Im on OT so yes. I know you can do better you deserve a fresh start with someone who isnt going to pull the same crap as Durka durka... Good luck <3
     
  15. ItchyDog

    ItchyDog Guest

  16. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    muhamid jihad?
     
  17. ProneToEpisodes

    ProneToEpisodes New Member

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    Durka durka muhamid durka??? Jihad? Durka durka :rofl:
     
  18. themacstallion

    themacstallion The electric sheep are dreaming up your fate

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    He wouldn't have dumped her unless you said something.
     
  19. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    I disagree
     
  20. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    :love: Good Morning Sweets. Coffee with durka durka was entirly plutonic (sp?) and coffee with the "other" ex was uneasy ;) But I was a good girl. And I have less than a week left! Wo0oh0o0o, we have been having some great phone conversations, and I have my battle helmet for our "talk" this weekend. Thats right folks it is shit or get off the pot time! I really do care about him, but I don't think I would be too upset either way, especially after this. :wiggle: P2E has requested I do NOT go into asshole mode if it is all done, I guess I will try :noes:
     
  21. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    Good for you... I think it will all work out for the best though.... all this stress will be gone and its just gonna be you and him time... the best kinda time :)
     
  22. ProneToEpisodes

    ProneToEpisodes New Member

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    Hate to say it but I totally agree. He got caught so he had to admit it.

    By staying with him are you not saying what he did was ok?
     
  23. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    It is okay, because we weren't in a commited relationship to begin with. In fact we still are not, the only reason I had a problem with it was because MY emotional level of commitment was a different level than his. I am finished talking about this, this weekend is the only thing that will tell wether we are going to stay together or not.
     
  24. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    doesnt sound that way to me. I have had past internet things that I totaly forgot about or didnt update/care about anymore... It slips minds sometimes.
     
  25. ProneToEpisodes

    ProneToEpisodes New Member

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    You obviously do NOT know the whole story.

    Im hate debating this on OT Insom, you know I love you :kiss:


    Your reaction yesterday about coffee with Durka shows there is NO possible way you love Gumbi.
     

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